In which Scorpius plans a new life in the Pacific, Albus is so nervous he forgets his own name, and there is a life-size cardboard cutout of Viktor Krum.
[can be read as a standalone]
Here it is, the scorbusquel at the request of shreya. Thank you to shreya, lisa, kayla, cass, isobel, kristina, bianca and anyone else who helped me out, you're all legends.
"You know what they say about wishes being horses you can't look in the mouth or whatever" is a mixup of two different idioms: "If wishes were horses, beggars would ride" and "Don't look a gift horse in the mouth", in case you're not familiar! I imagine it would be difficult to google.