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StarFeather

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StarFeather

I'll try one.

You may only use SOUND and SMELL in your writing.

 

“Harry…” a name came out from her mouth.

 

The unknown man’s name whispered in her painful voice brought him into senses. He cursed himself being afraid of the possibility he might have hurt her feeling. The name must be her boyfriend’s name. He didn’t want to let her think he took advantage of her kindness. Sitting up on the bed, the pillow fell on the floor with a flopping sound and he apologized his careless impulse. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. It’s complicated. My past memory confused me. And your beauty…I’m sorry.”

 

“Why are you look like him?” She muttered and left the room. Soon she came back with a cup of tea and a piece of pie. When she sat down next to him, a spring mattress made a small squeaking sound. And there was a scent of vanilla. “I made a lemon pie. Moar and I brewed a potion for you. Don’t worry. It doesn’t contain chemical substances.”

 

Gordon was going to ask her who was the guy named Harry, but he forgot asking when he inhaled the fragrance of minced lemon zest in the pie. The sound of pouring tea into a cup eased his nerves. The scent of citrus fruits mixed with the other herbs made his mind clear.

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WindingArrow

Kenny! This looks interesting. I love, love, LOVE the last paragraph! The smells really come through there and I really want something lemony now... Thank you for sharing!

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StarFeather

Thank you from me, too.  :D

This thread is really helpful. The description of things or people is one of my weak points in writing.

 

I tried one more:

Stared like that, he lost his words at a moment. To break the silence, he coughed lightly and said, “I’m hungry. Can I have breakfast at your castle?”

 

Rowena smiled gently, “Of course, you can. But you haven’t answered my question yet.” She stepped closer to him and waited for his answer.

 

He smelled the fragrance of roses from her hair. Without thinking, he said, “Yes, I do.”

 

“Good.” Satisfied, she tucked up her dress. And she began walking across moor. 

 

The sound of ripples in the gentle breeze on the heather was pleasant to his ears. He couldn’t stop smiling at her humming from behind. She was his strength to go on. Her wisdom and her prudence were what he needed in the midst of the Great Powers at that time.

 

 The breeze wafted the smell of bread baked outdoors. He heard two boy servants chat merrily in their heavy accent standing around a stone cooking stove. Sometimes, there were pop sounds and a clacking sound. He guessed invisible house-elves were working instead of the talkative young wizards.

 

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WindingArrow

You have no idea how excited I am that you find these helpful! (That was my goal, so I am really very genuinely and awesomely excited.) And this is another wonderful little piece! On top of what sounds like really great smelling bread, Rowena seems a bit manipulative with her rose smellingness. ^_^

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PaulaTheProkaryote

Kenny! These are awesome! I really love the Rowena one and I'm dying to know more about it!

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StarFeather

Thank you, Paula for your encouragement. :D

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StarFeather

I'll use the first line posted on June 20 for a new chapter. :)

 

 

The sandwich was mocking him and that was just the start of the bad day. Kreacher apologized Harry,

 

'Master, Kreacher is sorry. It will take one more week to prepare ham sandwiches.'

 

Harry stared at his cucumber sandwich. He liked the fresh smell of cucumber, but he didn't think he would be able to survive a day without eating meat. Hogwarts needed rebuilding. Manpower was essential, but a food shortage was serious.

 

 

 

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StarFeather
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Open the last scene you most recently wrote in a project, fic or original. (For those who do not write, the last scene you read in a fic or a book.) Rewrite the scene from the point of view of something that cannot be seen by the present characters, such as a hiding house elf, a dust bunny under a sofa, or a bird perched in a tree.

I'm writing a Muggle guy following Cho Chang  to the King's Cross station.  ( from chapter 5 of "Out of the Magical World".)

Quote

He believed that she would come out of the spot and continued watching the area. Someone must have heard his prayers, Cho emerged again with her company. The elder woman looked alike Cho. He guessed she was her mother. They carried suitcases and walked along the street. Grabbing his backpack, he hurried to the staircase and descended to the ground. They were going to pick up a taxi. He hid between buildings and flagged down the other cruising one after Cho’s taxi left. The taxi stopped near the King's Cross station and he heard Cho ask her mother to buy two tickets to Edinburgh. He wore the sunglasses just in case and followed them keeping a safe distance. On his way, he bought a newspaper.

  I'll rewrite the scene from Harry's POV.

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Harry was going to visit Dudley, who sent a letter to him via Diggle's owl. According to the letter, his cousin would wait for him at a café near the King's Cross station. Then he was surprised to see Cho Chang and Madam Chang threading their way through the crowd. He was going to talk to them before he noticed a Muggle guy following them. Harry was stunned by his appearance. The Muggle guy looked exactly like himself. Glancing at a watch on his wrist, Harry decided to follow them to make sure the guy wouldn't do any harm to Changs. He watched the man put on the sunglasses.  He looked good and Harry touched his own glasses with his right hand wondering if he should buy the authentic one.  People coming and going at the station looked pleasant and seemed to enjoy their summer vacation. When the Muggle guy dropped in a newspaper stand, he heard a voice from behind.  It was Dudley.

"Hey, Harry, long time no see. The café  is over there. Let's catch up over coffee."

"Oh, hi, Big D." He wavered between following the Muggle guy and going to the cafe with Dudley.  “I remembered my urgent business, so mind if I have you wait at the café? I’ll be back soon.”

 

Dudley nodded meaningfully and whispered, “I’ll wait at Caravan. Is your business magical?”

 

Harry smiled wryly and nodded back.       

 

 

Edited by StarFeather
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WindingArrow

This is intriguing and a little stalker-y. I like it! I'm actually going to the story to bookmark it for later because my curiosity has been piqued. Why is this dude following Cho? Why is Cho at King's Cross? Why does he look like Harry? Things that I'm sure the story will answer!

Did writing the scene from unknown points of view give you any insight to the scene?

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StarFeather
On 2017/9/13 at 9:25 AM, WindingArrow said:

This is intriguing and a little stalker-y. I like it! I'm actually going to the story to bookmark it for later because my curiosity has been piqued. Why is this dude following Cho? Why is Cho at King's Cross? Why does he look like Harry? Things that I'm sure the story will answer!

Did writing the scene from unknown points of view give you any insight to the scene?

Thank you for kind encouragement. I was inspired by Robert Galbraith's novels.

 

Yeah, definitely I got some insights to the next story! Thank you for giving me the chance!

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StarFeather
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 this month's first line I actually slightly modified from the song "Orange Colored Sky" by Nat King Cole.

 

Quote

I was minding my own business when love came and hit me in the eye.

Response to First Lines By WindingArrow Writing Exercises Resources & Information thread ^

My response ↓

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 I was minding my own business when love came and hit me in the eye. I had just greeted a few Pure-Blood familes who were invited to the party, my mother set for me to move on. Disgusted by the talk about their disadvantageous situation after the war, I stepped towards the window faced on the street. When I looked out of the window, I couldn't believe what I saw there. Gordon was still standing in the heavy rain with his sopping clothes. Unspeakable, suppressed feeling surfaced in my heart at the moment. I was convinced of my true feeling, "I love him".  

 

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StarFeather
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POV Change-Up

Someone is wearing a mask. Write a scene from the point of view of the mask OR from the point of view of the person behind it.

 

When I told my son that I came back to write a fanfiction, he said, "Write a mystery or a battle scene." So I tried with your hint ^.   :) 

Quote

 Morgana took off her mask and took a squint at a peeling door. A nurse must be in the house. Finally she discovered a clue to Bellatrix Lestrange’s unwanted child. She put on her mask again and pointed her wand at a key hole of the door. Her spell hit the right target and the door clicked opened in front of her. When she entered the house, a grey-haired witch stood up from a chair by a hearth. Her shadow swayed lit by a flame which had just blazed up.

 

Perturbed, she asked, “Who are you?”Her half-finished novel fell from her lap onto the floor with a thud.

 

“I can’t tell who I am. Where is an adopted daughter?”Her voice was clear in spite of her mask.

 

The old nurse straightened herself up.  I can’t tell you if you conceal who you are. Take off the mask!”Pulling her wand, she tried to cast disarming charm.

 

 Morgana was faster. She muttered, ‘Inperio’and asked again, “Where is Bellatrix Lestrange’s daughter? What’s her name?”

 

The nurse looked at Morgana with vacant eyes and answered, “Schloss Heidelberg. Her name is Verina Schlusser. A keeper of the jailers, Blau’s adopted daughrer.”

 

 

  

 Harry and Ginny were staring at the sunset hand in hand on the bench in the Quidditch pitch.It was a beautiful evening at Hogwarts. His cursed scar was cured and Hogwarts rebuilding would be finished soon. There was a hope for the future.

 

(to be continued)

 

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Pixileanin

Hey Kenny!  Nice scene.  I think the action flows and there is a good sense of urgency in it!

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StarFeather
13 hours ago, Pixileanin said:

Hey Kenny!  Nice scene.  I think the action flows and there is a good sense of urgency in it!

Thank you for stopping by and encouragement, Pixi!

I should've written "a squint at a door with a peeling paint"... 

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StarFeather

Random Senario, winter solstice... I feel like writing again. 

 

From Helga's POV

Excavation of an enormous big rock was performed by an ancient warlock. A brief winter sunlight penetrated into the stone corridor with its magical speed. There she prayed for the eternal wit of the Sorting Hat set in the middle of the back room where mystic power was charged only while the magnificent gleam of winter blessed all on the earth. Her silky black hair was seen between the stone walls, and then Helga heard her musical chants poured into the hat. When quietness in the dark came back, one male voice whispered, 

'Are you done, Rowena?'

The witch turned to the man with an elegant smile. 'Almost. Now the hat needs your spell, Salazar.' 

 

 

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StarFeather
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Genre: Mystery

 Character: Doctor

 Archetype: Femme Fatale

 Narration: Unreliable (first person’s POV)

 

 Situation (optional): Crime scene investigation

I need to output after inputting for the test. ^_^

 

 I knocked on the door to see him again. I longed for seeing him since I had met him in a small Muggle village surrounded by beautiful snow-capped mountains. As he was popular among local maidens with snow white skin which I didn’t have, I brewed a potion to seduce him. I cursed my biological parents who didn’t have milky skin. My foster parents used to have, but their long spending in a dark dungeon room made their skin pale in an unhealthy way. Mine was not even pale, but reddish-brownish like an ancient English man. I wondered if my biological mother’s skin was same as mine.    

 I fell in love with the Muggle doctor. Actually, it was one-way love. He had already got engaged to a bakery’s daughter. The odds were against me. I made a potion to seduce him.

 

 The blond haired man opened the door and the area above his eyes was pushed together to see me. “Guten Morgen, Fräulein Verina.” After I told him my condition, he hesitantly let me in.

 

 I followed him and sat on a stool in front of him. Standing, he put a stethoscope around his neck and tried smiling at me. “Merlin, he is so cute.” I muttered in my mind. While he was searching my file for diagnosing me, I pulled a vial from the sleeve and hastily poured liquid into his mug on the walnut desk.

 

 He turned his body to me and made a feigned smile. Flipping pages, he took a mug and drank it. I opened my front and waited for the moment. My plot worked as I planned. His blue eyes were glued to mine.   

 

 

 

 

 

 I stared at the back of my biological father who was being sent to Azakaban. I couldn’t fathom what he was thinking right now after being given life sentence. Morgana took care of all inheritance procedures. A position as an heir of Lestrange was bigger than my imperceptible pity mercy for him. My uncle, Rabastan, who was hiding somewhere, was the only threat for Morgana. I didn’t know why my mentor was afraid of him. Suddenly, he glanced back and as soon as his glaring eyes met mine, they got wide in astonishment. I saw the same reddish-brownish color on his face. He muttered,

 

“Bella?”

 

I didn’t respond and kept staring at his eyes. Then he was pulled into the prison by Hit Wizards in black robes.  

 

(HP and Druidic Magic, chapter 7 the beginning)

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