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Write a Bad Summary...


Stella Blue

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The idea of a good story summary, as we all know, is to get a reader interested in the story through a short paragraph or sentence that gives clues as to what the story is about. However, because it’s entertaining to poke fun at the things we love, this thread is the opposite: where you write a technically true but misguided summary that makes a story sound less appealing than it is. :P 

 

Examples:

 

Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s/Sorcerer’s Stone

An 11-year-old has conspiracy theories about one of his teachers and gets into a fight with a grown man over a rock.

 

The Lord of the Rings

Frodo Baggins goes to great lengths to discard litter on a mountain.

 

 

So.... Write a bad summary of your own fic, or a published novel, if you'd rather not mock your own writing :P, and post it here!

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Oh I love these! There are so many good ones on Twitter. ? I'll do one of my own and one published one!

you again

Quote

Two dumb humans repeat the same mistakes over and over for five hundred years.

Alice in Wonderland

Quote

A girl gets high.

 

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Oh, too much fun!

Ignite:

Quote

A privileged teenager sulks his way through a crisis; is inevitably acclaimed hero of the hour anyway.

 

And for published fare, Captain Corelli's Mandolin:

Quote

A small island community is more worried by internal drama than its Nazi occupation.

 

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Oh my goodness I love this so much. ?

Complicated:

Quote

Girl spends entire story attempting to keep her varying relationship status with the same boy a secret from everyone else. Is not very good at it.

 

 

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Omg I'm loving all of these ^

When I made the original post I didn't take the opportunity to make fun of myself so I'm posting again just for that :P 

 

Icarus:

Quote

Lily tells a few lies,  becomes a terrible houseguest, and then turns 25 twice.

 

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WIGOWY

Quote

Girl in love gets cheated on, makes a lifestyle out of it.

 

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Guest Rumpelstiltskin

This is a hilarious thread. I love this thread with all my heart.

 

For We, Lawbreaking Citizens

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Two men fall in love and are fluffy and gay while they try to escape a drug-pushing regime.  They like poetry.

 

For Gerald's Game by Stephen King

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A married couple go on vacation to reignite their love life. The hubby kicks the bucket after handcuffing his wife to the bed in a perfect sexy-time-gone-wrong scenario. She has to figure out how to escape before a stray neighborhood dog eats her. 

1

 

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  • 2 weeks later...

on miracle:

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girl gets a letter into hogwarts. wizarding world gets her into dumb stuff while all she wants is to explore. thinks about noping out of there multiple times.

on wrong place, wrong time:

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boy is pulled into weird time turner thing. knows too many memes and is exasperated the whole way. he might never go back home, but he's strangely indifferent to it.

on little red:

Quote

girl gets too arrogant. thinks apathy is the new Cool, probably.

 

Edited by sunshine_locks
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  • 2 weeks later...

I mean all my story summaries are already bad anyway, but I'll make them worse xD

for Two Months

Quote

Girl accidentally reveals that magic is real to another girl, but that other girl is like super cute. Happy gayness ensues.

For The Exaggerated True Story of Cordelia Kendall

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A girl who is totally not a self-insert is the fourth friend in the Fred-George-Lee friendship

For Then Time Stood Still

Quote

George is saaaad. Ron is a pretty rad brother.

 

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OMGosh, I love this topic so much, haha!!! ? Here is mine for Love, Not War [M] lol!!!

Quote

Draco Malfoy is forced to accept help from his blood-traitorous enemies as he sorts through his unresolved daddy issues. Meanwhile, a know-it-all from America moves in too, and tries to act like she "understands his feelings" or whatever, in an attempt to get closer to him... Yep. I'm sure nothing can do wrong here at all! 

I think that pretty much sums it all up, I'd say. ?

 

Edited by RoxiMalfoy
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Have to jump on the bandwagon... :P

All the truth about Jimmy Portman

Quote

American child transferred to UK discovers his father is a wanted criminal who kidnapped him; he gets quite grumpy over that.

 

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I don't even have the good summary written for Complex yet, but I have the bad one:

Quote

Adult relationships are somehow even harder than teenage ones, and no one understands how work-life balance works. Oh, and a bunch of people are murdered for having bad grades.

1

 

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On ‎7‎/‎28‎/‎2018 at 11:56 AM, Levana said:

I mean all my story summaries are already bad anyway, but I'll make them worse xD

for Two Months

Girl accidentally reveals that magic is real to another girl, but that other girl is like super cute. Happy gayness ensues.

 

Omg, I NEED to read this. Even the bad summary has me totally sold on it XD

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Here's one (1) for Evolution

Quote

Secretly bookish popular guy and openly bookish popular girl realize they don't actually hate each other and become the power couple that defends their school from a super-villain's plot for world domination.

 

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This thread is AWESOME. Here's mine:

The Princess Bride: (Which is very, very different from the movie, just so you're warned)

Spoiler

Girl meets boy. Girl proves to be flake when boy leaves to get a life. Girl then grows up. There's also a ton of guys who don't know when to let something go. Author spectates, a LOT.

The Hunger Games trilogy:

Spoiler

Meet Katniss Everdeen, also known as GMO Bird. The list of things she cares about is short, and overthrowing the corrupt government killing teenagers for fun isn't one of them.

The Grass Is Greener On the Other Side (Or So They Say) (M) by me

Spoiler

An uppity ward decides to play god (Or is it Merlin?) while Fem!Harry angsts over her general existence. Also, Voldemort and Barty Jr. are somewhere, but it doesn't seem to be much of a priority, for some reason.

 

Edited by Lady Ausra
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  • 4 months later...

Damn I thought I posted in here months ago! Here's one for Yaxley:

Quote

World's most stubborn boy hates world's most stubborn girl. Death-horses make an appearance. 

 

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For Home:

Quote

girl finds love and family over a year of brunch, tacos, and statistics

 

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Warpaint 

Spoiler

Rich and popular girl and socially anxious boy try to better themselves by learning from each other.

 

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i saw this thread and screamed because honestly tmt was made for a bad summary

Quote

Queen bee makes horrifying decisions whilst dealing with the development of her seer powers all while somebody systematically eliminates her family tree.

 

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  • 1 month later...

For No Accounting for Taste

Small-town girl meets city boy at university. Best Roommate Ever pushes these classmates, turned friends, turned awkward, turned lovers through three years of books, work, photos, and mayhem (as defined by two introverted nerds).

Edited by TidalDragon
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For Season of Love

Quote

Girl is strangely unmoved by Christmas but gets really excited about a random day a few days later.

 

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  • 10 months later...

This thread is hysterical. Why did it die??

 

For Ignatius:

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Catholic guilt. 'Nuff said.

 

For Irrational:

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Dating at work is an objectively terrible idea, but this girl is thirsty for Buddy Holly lookalikes.

 

And for some real literature:

For Gone Girl:

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These people are toxic, yo. Seriously, just don't ever get married.

 

For Goblet of Fire:

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Teenager is forced to participate in a potentially lethal competition, and for some reason nobody calls social services. A dance is involved for sexual tension.

 

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  • 2 weeks later...
Quote

Frodo Baggins goes to great lengths to discard litter on a mountain.

i am just discovering this thread and @Stella Blue YOU HAVE KILLED ME :roflol:

 

for Beyond Repair

Quote

sister with terrible interpersonal skills reach the most predictable ending ever.

 

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for 9.9 out of 10, highly recommend:

Spoiler

two idiots being too competitive for their own good is somehow the thing that finally makes them fall for each other

 

for and all the pieces fall (aka the unpublished novel, so this won't be as funny to anyone else as it is to me):

Spoiler

how many strange places can two people hook up before they do it on an actual bed

 

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for physical fatality:

Quote

aggressive(ish) sex with entirely too many references to fire

for reckless/the drastoria series:

Quote

girl deals with ptsd in possibly inappropriate ways

for intoxicating/the dominique weasley series:

Quote

questionable life choices and bad decisions™

for the art of being nonchalant:

Quote

emotionally stunted girl uses her best friend, sex and quidditch to not deal with anything

 

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