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Reviews For In this Darkness

Name: danicalifornia (Signed) · Date: 25 Oct 2018 08:15 PM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 23: Mid-Morning Thieves

yayyy! so happy theres an update! i know there is so much story left to be written but wow I just want Lily and Xander to be happy together now. 



Name: H_girl (Anonymous) · Date: 12 Oct 2018 11:21 AM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 23: Mid-Morning Thieves

Yeeeees, finally! After weeks of dispaire ( I was truly starting to think you abbandoned us all), today I felt  something different,joyful  in the universe. So here i am, wondering how long will it be till next chapter. I really really missed this story, please keep updating . Love hgiirl 

 



Author's Response:

Awe, I would never abondon you!Lol Thank you for sticking with this story and being so patient! I'll be working on another update soon :)



Name: Isys (Signed) · Date: 20 Sep 2018 05:39 AM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 22: Charmed Mistletoe

Hey there!

 

I am completly aware that this is my third submit and I'm not trying to put pressure on you. It's just that I'm worried and I need to know that you are okay and still there.

 

Again, I will wait all the time needed to read more about your story because it's the best one I've ever read.

 

Tons of love,

 

Isys.



Author's Response:

Hi Isys!

 

Thank you so much for checking on this story and being so patient! I just submitted chapter 23 so as soon as it goes through the queue, you'll be able to see it :) I really hope you enjoy it!

 

All my love, Quilly



Name: H_girl (Anonymous) · Date: 21 Jun 2018 12:16 AM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 22: Charmed Mistletoe

Hello!!! I miss this story so much!

I check for updates from time to time and today I came across something funny: on the summary pages it says story has been updated on June 6th and 18th, yet last chapter I can read is #22 ( last chapter on HPFF). 

I think I do something wrong.. how do I make this site work ???

I REALLY want to read more of your amazing novel. Please help.



Author's Response:

I had updated corrections to previous chapters but no new chapters! I am so sorry for not updating sooner but life has been so hectic. I am working on a new chapter though and as soon as it's ready, it'll be posted. Thank you so much for your  support!  It means the world to me! 



Name: Isys (Signed) · Date: 04 Jun 2018 03:12 AM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 22: Charmed Mistletoe

Hi there!

 

I really hope you are still there, i couldn't live without more chapters of your marvelous story. I'll be be waiting all time needed.

 

Lots of love, 

Isys.



Author's Response:

Thank you for the support <3 I am working on fixing some typos and what not that I hadn't been able to work on since the story got transferred but I'll be working on a new chapter soon :)



Name: Ameera (Signed) · Date: 22 Apr 2018 04:11 PM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 22: Charmed Mistletoe

Hi !! 

Just wanted to say that i am so glad you are continuing this story , still your biggest fan over here so thank you so much ! 

-A



Author's Response:

Thank you for sticking around, A! I am going over the story fixing some grammar mistakes and little things but I'll be working on a new chapter soon :)



Name: Isys (Signed) · Date: 14 Apr 2018 10:53 AM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 22: Charmed Mistletoe

Hey there!

 

I couldn't be anymore glad that you moved the sory and you're actually going to continue it! I, reaally, couldn't live without an ending or more chapters of this fantastic novel.

 

I never had time to review this chapter on the other website, so I'm taking my hype here!

 

It was a really touching chapter, and as I already started to see some chapters before, Edward really has a good heart. And I absolutely love the fact that the "villain" in this story, is not. Because It's so tired always having a bad Slytherin ruining the love story between the two protagonists, and having an antagonist who you can actually love is so refreshing. He just don't messes around, he's a sweet in love boy who really don't have a choice because he loves his family indeed.

 

I really loved him,  with all his flaws, because let's face it, he's far from perfect.

 

As is Lily or Xander or Hugo or anyone in this novel. You make them so real that I can't help but relate to them and love them and you know, actually believe the story. You can really make us, readers, deep into the story without second guessing. 

And finally, Hugo and Hannah kissed and I couldn't be any more excited about it, they're just so perfect for each other! And the moment was totally sweet, Hugo is just lovely.

 

Thank you very much your writing, and specially, for continuing to do so.

 

Your very loyal and grateful fan,

 

Isys.

 



Author's Response:

Isys! 

 

It's so good to see you over here! I'm so glad you're liking Edward's characters. I really don't like characters who are all bad or all good, so it means the world to me that you think that they're relateable. Oh and Hugo and Hannah kissing has been a scene I'd been trying to write for some while... I love those two. Sometimes I think they're all the stability and sweetness that Xander and Lily lack lol 

 

Thank YOU for following this story! It's so wonderful to see familiar faces over here!

Love,

Quilly



Name: victoria_anne (Signed) · Date: 13 Apr 2018 07:09 AM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 22: Charmed Mistletoe

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OH HELLO THERE!

Oooh, the chapter title got me very excited.

YEAH, LILY, WHAT'S GOING ON BETWEEN YOU AND XANDER, HMM? I got your back, Ed. Just this once.

Ooh, okay, I've been meaning to tell you this but I kept forgetting so here's my chance. I've been reading Wuthering Heights for one of my classes (and I'm sooo obsessed with it, like what) but I always think of Lily and Xander as Cathy and Heathcliff. Mostly how both pairs were brought up as siblings, but now that I think about it, there's also the love/hate thing going on. I can't help it, and it makes me love both stories even more ♥

Anyway.

LILY! I just want to hug that girl! I love seeing this moment of weakness, and all her feelings brought to the surface. And look at how she thinks of Xander!!! Ugh I love those two so much!

Omg having Hugo and Hannah stuck under the mistletoe is SO CUTE I can't even! FINALLY they're admitting their feelings for each other I'M SO HAPPY! Now, if only two other characters could do the same, hmm... Also, Edward's comments were so funny.

Aww what a sweet, fluffy chapter, I enjoyed it so much!!! ♥



Name: victoria_anne (Signed) · Date: 09 Apr 2018 10:35 PM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 21: Rude Awakenings

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Heya Quilly!

Thank you sooo much for letting me know this chapter was up! Things are a little busy for me at the moment so I really appreciate you stopping by and giving me the opportunity to sit down with a cup of tea and my favourite story ♥

So I try to review as I read but I got so caught up once Lily stormed into the room and I pretty much had my mouth open the whole time. Amazing amazing to read Lily directing her fire (that I love so much) at Xander, but instead of usual circumstances, she's trying to protect him and hot damn I love it so much.

Too bad their little moment didn't last, but what else is new haha!

Having Lily be a historical event rather an a historical person is absolute perfection.

I swear, everyone needs a friend like Hugo. He's so honest and down-to-earth and absolutely nothing gets by him when it comes to his friends.

Ohh that ending is beautiful, with the Icarus references and Lily pretty much being the sun. I thought I'd be happy to have Xander pretty much in full acceptance of his feelings, but the fact that he's not going to do much about it yet still leaves me sad wahhh.

So in response to your last response (heh), I've mostly been working on an original novel but I've been wanting to dive back into Finn's world lately! Its just, you know, finding ideas...

Anyway, absolutely adored this chapter, and I hope you let me know when the next one is up! I can't wait to read more about those Clarifiers and how it will affect the school. Hope everything is well with you ♥ ♥    



Name: victoria_anne (Signed) · Date: 09 Apr 2018 10:34 PM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 20: Edward Ballard

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I don't even like the guy and he gets a whole chapter named after him, ugh.

Poor Edward having to deal with such a bad father :( 
Although I loved the dialogue between him and Xander. I can smell the testosterone from here. I really loved the tension in their words and that Xander remains nonchalant. It's perfect and I really enjoyed it. Especially since it's filled with so much information. Things are clearer now, but also a lot more intense.

Wow wow wow, I knew I loved Xander but I didn't realise how much until this chapter. He is so real to me, I keep forgetting this is fanfiction and he's not a character from a published book on my shelf. I LOVE his little self-realisation moment, with the girls, and how it affected him so deeply that he's had this overwhelming sense of feeling lost. I hope this means we find out more about his past soon. But for now, it was extremely well done and I really enjoyed this chapter! I hope life slows down for you soon, both for your sanity and so I have another chapter to read soon :P ♥    



Name: victoria_anne (Signed) · Date: 09 Apr 2018 10:33 PM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 19: An Unexpected Visitor

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Hello Quilly!!! Long time no talk! 

Ooh things are really taking a dark turn in the wizarding world. As if I couldn't be sucked into this story any more than I already am, I'm fascinated by the Clarifiers and can't wait to see how this conflict plays out. The idea of Ballard saying Harry, Ron, and Hermione have been idolised for so long when things have changed is sad but interesting. I don't believe it of course but it definitely adds some realism to the story that there are always people out there ready to disagree and stir trouble for others.

"What is it with you and dragons anyways?" - Do you know how many times I get this a day?

CHRISTMAS IS COMING. THE MOST MAGICAL TIME OF THE YEAR!!! I swear if I don't get some beautiful mistletoe action between Lily and Xander in the next few chapters, Quilly, I'm coming after you.

"I make sure that the rest of my body is fit enough to support it." - HAHAHAHAHA I love him so much. But wait, there's more! - "Well then I commend you on such excellent manners."

Lucy is hilarious, and so is her relationship with Xander! Let's see her more!

He says he'd give her the moon, and she'd just toss it to the side and demand for the sun instead. - Holy moley I love this so much?! Also I tried really hard not to write a review where I just quoted the whole chapter back to you but I'm failing :P 

Oooh Ballard is here! And here I was just saying what a nasty piece of work he was and he's HERE! I've gotta read on - see you soon! ♥    



Name: victoria_anne (Signed) · Date: 09 Apr 2018 10:33 PM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 18: Hannah

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Hello! ♥

Look, I don't care if you're tired of me praising those opening paragraphs, ...but here it comes again. I love this especially: had been pleased to find the woodfire in the head's common room every bit as awake as him...

Omg I'm dying over the relationship between Hugo and Hannah. They are so adorable, and I love the little system they have to learn more about each other.

Hannah, however, was completely transparent, and that was, in Hugo's opinion, an approach to life that required a great deal more of courage. WHY HAVE YOU MADE US WAIT SO LONG FOR THE BEAUTY THAT IS HUGO/HANNAH?! More please!

OH MY GOD and that child they're looking for is Xander, isn't it? It has to be.

I'm sorry if this review is just me quoting the entire chapter back to you, but: It was as if her heart was big enough to hold on to the problems of all seven continents while Hugo could only barely handle his own. LOVE IT ♥

I love the Snow White reference :D

I absolutely loved this Hugo-centric chapter. We seriously need more of them. 

♥ ♥ ♥    

 



Name: victoria_anne (Signed) · Date: 09 Apr 2018 10:32 PM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 17: Heated Arguments with Slytherin Boys

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HEYA QUILLY!

No way was I staying away for so long again, haha!

I seriously just want to collect all your opening paragraphs and keep them bundled together for me to read over because I just love them so much. They're always so well written and I'm drawn in straight away (more than I already am, anyway!)

Aw, I love the reason Hannah and Lily grew so close ♥

Lily felt the fluttering in her ribcage start again as his eyes momentarily met hers. CAN YOU HEAR ME FANGIRLING?! *flails*

...annoyingly handsome in his Slytherin robes... And here we have a description of my perfect man.

I also really love when you mention the media. It makes it all so realistic and some of the things that the journalists come up with are ridiculous, but it really does happen, and I find I'm really empathetic towards Lily.

I HAVE SO MANY EMOTIONS RIGHT NOW I CAN ONLY EXPRESS IN CAPSLOCK!!! Usually, I review as I read but from Edward and Lily's conversation, I could tear my eyes away. I was glued to my screen. And then Xander and Lily yelling at each other actually felt so good because they have so much pent up emotion AND THEY KISSED AND I GOT BUTTERFLIES but ughhh we're back to normal again.

*takes deep breath*

Man, that was intense. I love this story so freaking much.

Also, to answer your last review response, yasss I'm a Hufflepuff! And OH MY GOD you have no idea how perfect that idea is - a dragon party with Finn and Xander. I just *dies* That's the dream :D

(I had withdrawals too, so it's funny you should mention because I have just posted a little something! I hope you like it! I also have something in Brindley's POV so I can link you to that if you want, but right now I feel terrible talking about myself on a review for your story!)

♥ ♥ ♥    



Name: victoria_anne (Signed) · Date: 18 Jan 2018 06:25 AM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 16: A Letter from Scorpius

Phew, you are updating like crazy, my friend! But it's so nice to come back to this story and see I have plenty left to read :)

Cantankerous really is an excellent word.

Ooh a new purist group. I don't think I like where this is going. Scary stuff.

My little cinnamon bun Xander is so worried that Lily is sick! Argh, he melts my heart! But he just isn't dealing with his feelings in a very healthy way *shakes head*

Yay Maya's a Hufflepuff! House pride!

It's the little descriptions, Quilly, that make this story so freaking enjoyable. I just love that the librarian is busy reading a romance novel. 

"Lily says it's because you're so ugly, you'd melt whatever camera tried photographing you" OMG THAT IS HILARIOUS! XD

Maya is seriously the cutest. AND I LOVE DRAGONS TOO! I need to be besties with this tiny girl.

Aw and Scorpius and Rose got engaged!!! ♥

Oh gosh this chapter was so adorable. I LOVE that we saw such a softer side of Xander. I always knew it was there, but to see it come out with a young girl who also doesn't have a mother is really wonderful to read. I loved it.

I hope you're well, my dear, wherever you are in the world! ♥ ♥ ♥    



Name: victoria_anne (Signed) · Date: 18 Jan 2018 06:24 AM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 15: Potions with Slughorn

QUILLY MY LOVE I STAYED AWAY FOR SO LONG AND I'M SORRY!

*eep* I'd almost forgotten about Xander's extracurricular activities! Interesting, interesting...

Okay oh my gosh I absolutely adore the whole conversation between Xander and Hugo, but I especially love this: "If Lily had fallen into the lake, you'd probably go jump right in after her. Merlin knows you're invested enough." 
And I LOVE that Hugo gave him an excuse to find Lily! :D

The way you write about the comparison of Lily to a china doll and then a dragon is just SO BEAUTIFUL! Also so true.

Dude, I just... I just really love Xander. When this story is done, and you're finished with him, may I take him home, please? He's all I want for Christmas :P

Hehe trust Slughorn to want to collect Harry and Hermione's kids!

"My mum says that I have my father's lack of tact," suggested Hugo helpfully, "so there is that." HAHAHA oh bless him!

Quilly, this chapter was just so utterly brilliant. Definitely my new favourite. Xander was amazing, I love his naughty attitude (snake jokes, anyone?) and calling out Lily on her being uncomfortable and almost scared around him. ♥    



Name: victoria_anne (Signed) · Date: 18 Jan 2018 06:24 AM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 14: Maya Creevey

Hiya Quilly!

Dreaming about Xander, are we, Lily? Interesting. (Me too, kid, me too.)

I'm a lot more fun to get under HE IS SASS AND CHEEK. I love it!

I am only sorry I didn't run into you harder SPEAKING OF SASS AND CHEEK. Merlin, I love these two so much.

Ooh I'm wondering now if Lily got herself in a little too deep with Edward. The whole thing sounds quite ominous now, and I hope when/if she lets him down, it doesn't have any repercussions. I worry about my little Lily.

OH MY GOSH DENNIS!!! What an amazing scene, I was completely enraptured. Fourteen chapters in and I'm still surprised by this story and loving it more and more. How sweet that Maya got to meet her idol (who just wandered into her room, of all things) and that Lily can see a little bit of herself in Maya. In fact, Lily convincing Maya to go to Hogwarts is very much like Dumbledore taking Harry to see Slughorn and I absolutely love it. I'm wondering if that's why Neville brought her along in the first place. Hm, very interesting that Xander will become her tutor. I'm actually a bit nervous to find out where all that goes.

This chapter was so wonderful, Quilly! I can't wait to see what you have planned for us poor readers! ♥ ♥ ♥    



Name: victoria_anne (Signed) · Date: 18 Jan 2018 06:23 AM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 13: Professor Reagan's Offer

Hello, Quilly!

Once again I'm amazing by your descriptions. Teach me your chapter-opening ways!!!

I love the description of difference in appearance between Edward and Lily. Trust Xander to notice!

Aw, Hugo, my adorable little cinnamon bun. My sweet summer child. I love how happy he is to talk to Hannah. Haha aaand this is why Xander can't keep a girlfriend!

"Both good at playing games." I love that because it's so true. Lily and Xander are both so deep behind the masks they wear that I think they've forgotten how to take them off.

"And how that laugh had been so unintended and fun that he had almost smacked himself a third time just to hear it again." OMG MY HEART THIS IS KILLING ME.

Okay where did Lily get the dragon magazine because I want one.

"At least it's nowhere near as creepy as Harry's parselmouth ability." HAHA! I'm sorry to practically be quoting the whole story back to you but there's just so many great things in this chapter!

Ooh and we're finally back to Xander's powerful abilities. I can't wait to see where this goes and what he's capable of (but scared at the same time!)

Professor Reagan is such a Slytherin.

"An era in which a young and charming student with exceptional talent, much like yourself, nearly destroyed the world we live in..." Amazing.

Gah what a great way to end this already incredible chapter! ♥    



Name: victoria_anne (Signed) · Date: 18 Jan 2018 06:23 AM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 12: In the Dancefloor

I get to start off this review with more congratulations - on story of the month this time! WOOHOO!

The wedding sounds lovely but ooohhh, what's going on with Harry and Ron that we don't know about? Something coming up in work, perhaps? I like how you've subtly reminded us about what happened in the first chapter, and bringing it back to our attention. I know I had forgotten that something bigger might be going on involving Xander's real family!

Aw, look at Lily being a protective little sister! And oh my goodness, calling an iPod a music box! XD

Hagrid is her godfather! Oh gosh that is the sweetest thing EVER!

Aw, the necklace ♥ Gorgeous. (Xander, my birthday is in November. Kthanks)

Ugh just what is going on in Xander's pretty little head?

Another great chapter, Quilly! It was great seeing more of James and Albus, too! ♥



Name: victoria_anne (Signed) · Date: 18 Jan 2018 06:22 AM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 11: the Elephant in the Room

I'm glad you liked the aesthetic, Quilly! I got a bit nervous in case you thought I'd perceived Xander all wrong haha.

Oh my goodness, God bless Hugo. What a darling little cinnamon bun. I live for moments between him and Lily.

LILY LUNA-TIC POTTER! Omg that is brilliant! Ha ha!

Ooh they're finally asking about where Xander came from. I wonder if/when we'll find out!

Okay so whyyy must you write about Xander in grey sweatpants with water dripping down his chest, hmm??? You're killing me here! ♥

I love that Hugo knows exactly how to play his friend to get information, haha.

Seriously, I love Hugo. That is all.    



Name: victoria_anne (Signed) · Date: 18 Jan 2018 06:21 AM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 10: Seventeen

Hey Quilly!

So great to see Victoire and Teddy here! I'm excited for their wedding! I can't believe Victoire got an actual ship as gift once, haha! I love what she said about how the ship can only take her so far on the water, and Teddy takes her to the moon. That's so sweet ♥

I also love the connection you made between Lily and Ginny at 17, and it's so true (sorry Lily!) I'm glad Lily is starting to recognize it. But (and I think I've said this before) Lily is flawed, and that's what makes her such a great character. At least she's becoming aware of it now, and maybe she can change.

"You look okay." Oh, Xander. Ever the gentleman.

Aw, it was nice of Xander to give her a gift! I wonder what it is!

Also, I left you a little something on your profile :) Speak soon! ♥    



Name: victoria_anne (Signed) · Date: 18 Jan 2018 06:21 AM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 9: Inside the Broom Closet

Ahh you're updating so fast! I love it! (And teach me your waysss)
I don't know how it took me so long to get here when we last left Lily and Xander in a broom closet, but I'm here now! Yay! :D

I love them together. I love how Lily always feels she has something to prove, and wants to do things without his help. Her thoughts go at a hundred miles per hour and he's just cool as a cucumber. I love them. So. Damn. Much.

Bless Molly, that little studious treasure. Her father would be so proud to know that's what she does with a boy.

Gah it was all going so well. I was reading like "Kiiiss... kiiiss!" But I should have known it wouldn't happen that easily haha! Noo you two don't hate each other! NOW KISS!

Oops, sorry, got a bit carried away again.

You wrote a whole chapter set in a broom closet, and it was amazing. Well done, Quilly :) ♥



Name: victoria_anne (Signed) · Date: 18 Jan 2018 06:20 AM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 8: Midnight Escapades

Hello hello! ♥

First off, CONGRATULATIONS on being a featured story! That's very exciting and of course very well deserved!

Of course Xander wears leather. I'm drooling all over my keyboard here.

I'm a little bit sad that Lily had an opportunity to check him out longer while under the Cloak, and he ruined it for us - I mean, her... *ahem*

Oh my oh my oh my. Not-so-Invisible tension.

The way you write Xander's dialogue is so amazing. As a character I swear he just leaps right off the screen. The way he talks just flows so naturally and realistically, and I'm envious! 

Another thing I really love about Xander is how he's always calling Lily out. It's hilarious most of the time, like him catching her smelling his jacket, haha!

She is so not subtle, oh my goodness. I'm cracking up with second hand embarrassment at her asking Xander if he's a bad boy.

SOMEONE'S CAUGHT THE FEELS!

AND SOMEONE WITH THOSE FEELS IS NOW IN THE BROOM CLOSET! MAYDAY! MAYDAY!

Excellent work as usual, Quilly! Can't wait (like really can't wait) to find out what happens next!

♥    



Name: victoria_anne (Signed) · Date: 18 Jan 2018 06:20 AM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 7: Roommates

Quilly! 

I finally found the time to return, sorry it took so long!

Oof, Lily's friends sound like they could be a bit of a handful, and a bit of extra pressure on Lily.

I KNEW Nia would be after Xander! That's just going to end in disaster for everyone involved.

I can't even review as I read like I usually do because I'm so sucked in!

Remember in chapter 3 how I commented about the scene seeming really long because it was mostly dialogue? Well this whole chapter is one scene, with girls talking, but it works. You've broken it up with enough feelings, thoughts and actions, and it had me gripped on every word. I'm watching you improve with every chapter, and it's amazing, and I'm proud!

♥ B    



Name: victoria_anne (Signed) · Date: 18 Jan 2018 06:19 AM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 6: Herbology

I have things to do, Quilly, so if you could stop leaving me wanting more, that would be great.

Jokes! But how can I resist with a chapter summary like that, especially when it starts in Xander's POV?

I love love love how many details Xander notices about Lily. He's got it bad.

And speaking of Lily, I love reading about the darker side to having a famous father. All the thoughts that Caroline (among others, I'm sure) has are pretty expected, even if they're not very nice. I bet they do all think she has life handed to her on a silver platter.
Oh and look at her using her powers with the thestral. 

It's an extremely interesting detail to have Xander struggle to grow plants. The idea that living things don't respond to him very much adds to his dark demeanour. It makes me wonder even more what you have planned for Xander in the future.

In fact, that whole Herbology scene is amazing. I was annoyed at Caroline for Lily's sake, haha! But even just with Xander's thoughts of Professor Longbottom (which is totally accurate - I bet he really wouldn't seem like the type of person who destroyed a Horcrux in battle) and the description of the plants needing love and smiles is so enjoyable. 

Uh oh, and now the two of them are up to no good?!

Another excellent chapter - I'll be back soon!

♥    



Name: victoria_anne (Signed) · Date: 18 Jan 2018 06:19 AM · [Report This]
Story:In this Darkness Chapter: Chapter 5: Hugo's Request

Hello Quilly! ♥ 

I have so much to say about that very first paragraph. How do you do that?! It's an interesting way to open a chapter, I love every word. Although I'm surprised that Xander doesn't like his reflection. I suppose I just assumed that he would. Ooh and the mirror is the entrance to the Head dorm? That's flipping awesome! That's such a cool detail.

I love the idea that he wants to occupy his time with learning to become an Animagus. I wonder what form he would take? The way McGonagall refuses Xander in so many things is so similar to Dumbledore and Tom Riddle, and I'm kind of glad she's there to make sure he doesn't get carried away.

I like that Hugo can see straight through Xander. I think that's important for Xander, and it's especially good for him to have a true friend (even if Xander is using him to get others out of detention *rolls eyes*)

Um, excuse me, Xander, there is no such thing as awful bed hair :P

"Empty corridors are way too public," said Xander with a sly smile, "for the things I like to do." OMG what are you doing to me, Quilly?!

I think one (just one - there's so many!) of the appealing things about this story is how far from perfect the main characters are. Lily and Xander may have a lot in commom, but not all of these things are good. The characters feel real.

You honestly have such a talent, and I can't wait to read more from you!

♥ B    



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