Hi guys! :)
So I've never actually seen an Oliver Wood/Cedric Diggory story before, so I had to stop by when I saw it, because it just sounded so interesting - all the Quidditch-related competition, hormones and adrenaline; it's all a pretty potent mix for the poor boys :P Plus the title was so good and so cute, haha.
Anyway, I'm here now! I gotta say, I know you guys wrote this for the challenge, so you both feel you're not good at the bits you wrote - dialogue and description - but, honestly, you can't tell that, or that two different people wrote it together. Everything about it fits together so well - the description is lovely and the dialogue is perfect for teeangers. Seriously, it's so good and so complete and compact - and all of the writing is so good.
I love the way you characterise them both - how in the end, Cedric's the one who's brave and who wrong-foots Oliver, having been blushing and stuttering and desperately trying to be cool the whole way through; how Oliver, in typical Gryffindor fashion blurts out to start the conversation, but then gets kinda tongue-tied and carried away with apologising for so many other things before he gets round to the 'I like you' bit :P It all fits in so well with what we know of them from canon - Oliver's reckless, bull-headed approach to Quidditch, and Cedric being kind and patient and just generally lovely. Also, I loved the little mentions of Quidditch dotted throughout this - when they thought about how they were always surrounded by other people, on the pitch or with friends, how they knew each other despite being in different years, and having different friends through Quidditch. It was a great touch.
(Also, I gotta say, it's always one of my personal quibbles that stories set in Hogwarts never seem to involve any studying, so I loved that you included them studying, on their little not-date in the Library, haha, with their chairs a bit too close together and the quiet voices :P)
Seriously, this was a really lovely cute story, and you guys did so so well with the challenge :)
Hey Sam and Lily!
What a wonderful little piece! I'm so impressed that you wrote this together and it's so smooth which is amazing. I thought you two nailed both parts in here. I haven't heard this pairing before so it's new for me but I really enjoyed the dynamic created between the two characters.
I love that humour was injected into this piece, 'Standard heterosexual competition.' just amused me! I thought the banter between was really well done like I felt that it really created tension and chemistry between the two boys but the dialogue at the end was so really cute like awkward but the declaration was out in the open.
I like that we see the story through Cedric's eyes, I thought the way Cedric kinda has a running analysis of what Oliver might be thinking as he is trying to work out all these signs works so well along side the dialogue. I thought it was just lovely that I was able to follow Cedric as he relaxes into Oliver's company, so the declaration at the end doesn't feel rushed or out of the blue but it works perfectly. This was such a lovely piece, well done to both of you! :)
- Abbi xo
NEW STORY NEW STORY NEW STORY.
I'm kind of sad that I'm not the first person to review this, but that's time zones for you. Pesky things.
This was so perfect! I'm so amazed by the way that you managed to put this story together, and that it flowed so seamlessly between the description and the dialogue - if it hadn't been for the challenge and the author's note, I would never have guessed that they were written by two different people.
I don't think that I've ever read a story about Cedric and Oliver before, but I'm now firmly shipping the two of them together. You wrote this so convincingly, and the two of them were really sweet together - I can definitely picture them as a couple. We'll just pretend that nothing interesting at all happened to Cedric after this year, shall we?
I thought you opened this really well - it was so easy to believe that, in spite of the age gap, the two of them would know each other from captaining their respective Quidditch teams and having played for a few years. The teasing and banter that comes from that was really fun to read, as was Cedric's first retort. His embarrassment at that was so adorable, especially because he was confused and trying not to get excited by Oliver's answer.
You captured Cedric's character really well in this piece - we got to see the conscientious student and the competitive Quidditch player, but I really liked the new side that we got to see here, with the flutter of feelings he has for Oliver and the distraction that's so rude and unhelpful as he's trying to focus on important things like his studies and exams.
The two of them were so cute as they danced around each other, though, and I kind of wanted to shake them both until they realised that they liked each other. The little moments of flirting and the blushes were adorable.
I was so happy that they organised that study session though, and I really enjoyed reading the moment that the penny dropped for Cedric and the two of them realised that they did actually like each other. It was so understated but really lovely to read the two of them together - I would be very much behind the idea of you writing more about Oliver and Cedric in the future (but only happy fluffy pieces please, my heart can't take seeing these two adorable kids be pulled apart).
Also, I loved the repetition of "a sliver too coy" and the way that it changed in meaning through the story as Cedric became more confident in the knowledge of what Oliver felt for him.
Hi, Sam. After a long time since I stopped by your story, and chatting on the forums, I thought of dropping my review here.
Wow, a new romance shot. And Cedric and Oliver, they are the most handsome duo and Quidditch stars!
I imagined at first, you will describe the Quidditch scene like a match after match, they will get together...a kind of things. But you didn't. It's very fresh, 'cause you tried writing their first recognition each other and their young love set in the quite place like in a library.
Most of readers might expect their detailed physical contact, you didn't, which made this story more impressive.
You repeated "a sliver too coy, and that time Cedric had no doubts whether it could be classified as flirting." People remember their first love a long time ago. The first love might begin like that way, like your Cedric and Oliver.
I also like the expresssion, "No crowds of onlookers, no bludgers darting between them, just the two of them in a close and quiet space." Especially, I like that you put the Quidditch related words, "no bludgers darting between them".
It's romantic that Cedric was good at Astronomy and Oliver (I think, perhaps) at Defence Against the Dark Arts theory (he is Gryffindor, so we'd like to think that way. :D).
The whole time I was reading this, I was just trying to figure out the logistics of how you two wrote this. The final piece is so charming, but filling in all the blanks in between all the dialogue, and planning the dialogue without the descriptions, must have been really difficult. So good job, for writing such a well-written story despite the lack of full freedom!
There were so many instances of adorable blushing and hidden feelings in this fic that after awhile, I began to grow flustered myself, just watching these two idiots dance around each other. After Oliver and Cedric met each other in the library, and they were just awkwardly greeting each other, I was ready to just slam their heads together. Because how could they not have seen that they were both completely infatuated with one another?
So the study session was cute, and a good ending to the story. I was so thankful they talked it out reasonably. Promotes good communication techniques.
Really enjoyed this!