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Name: Rumpelstiltskin (Signed) · Date: 13 Sep 2018 08:54 PM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:you make me feel good Chapter: if you can't win, fight dirty

Hey, dear! I'm here with your entry review to the Prefect's Challenge! [You'll be getting your bonus reviews soonish :) ]

 

I love how amused Albus is at his father's reaction to bringing Scorpius back for the holidays, holding his hand to boot, as his boyfriend. Plus, Scorpius's reluctance and feeling quite out of place did wonders to starkly contrast Al's reaction. I really enjoyed the way you introduced James and Lily's characterizations into the mix, too, and most especially because of the humorous way in which you did it (because the 'successful Apparated once" and "Albus successfully did a split once, too" bit had me laughing).

 

And I really enjoyed the way that you revealed to the reader what the pretense was behind Scorpius and Al's 'dating'. Albus asking Scorpius to be his fake-boyfriend to piss his parent's off because he's craving the attention that his siblings are getting from them is laughable (though  I do feel bad for him). The banter between Scorpius and Albus is fun (especially the part about being a bad kisser) -- they make great friends. I bet they'd make great boyfriends, too. 

 

Ginny being totally unperturbed by Albus bringing Scorpius home is awesome and largely makes sense for her characterization. While Harry is struggling to wrap his brain around AL dating Scorpius, Ginny's just naturally in "Mom" mode: how did you two start dating and are you being safe? Heheh. Mortifying questions are part of every parent's agenda, in my opinion. 

 

Oh gosh. Yeah, I can imagine that Scorpius being an only child was not prepared for the Potter-Weasley-Granger clan of absolute madness that was sure to be a Next-Gen Christmas at the Burrow. Plus, Molly must be super busy with the amount of jumpers she now has to make for Christmas, haha! I love how good is (like he's a natural) at being Al's boyfriend, and I also love how Albus is not-so-great at it, though it does make for some great humor. Plus, it provided the perfect opportunity for a mistletoe kiss...and for Albus to forget they weren't actually dating. 

 

And I love how the trend of Al forgetting they weren't dating continued. Plus, kissing Scorpius and trying to use annoying James as an excuse is cute...and all he really wants to do is kiss Scorpius. Really, that's what we all want -- for Scorpius and Albus to kiss more, haha! And the resolution is sweet, too, where they both discover that the other has feelings for each other, and Scorpius' have been there all along.

 

Great job! Thanks so much for entering the challenge!

 

-Rumpels



Name: ShadowRose (Signed) · Date: 16 Aug 2018 07:46 PM · [Report This]
Story:you make me feel good Chapter: if you can't win, fight dirty

Quodpot Review: Match 1

 

Hi Emma! I love myself a good Scorbus friends-to-lovers trope, and I equally love any and all fake-dating tropes, so I’m honestly a bit surprised I haven’t read this earlier.

 

I seriously love Albus’ logic here - he can’t get his parents’ attention doing something good, so the next best option is to do something “bad,” aka dating a Malfoy. Like, it’s just next level petty and I love it so much.

 

“He was clearly more fond of method acting” … orrrrrrrr the boy has a huge crush on you and you also like him and y’all just don’t have your feelings figured out yet.

 

“He realized first but didn’t say anything, and then I cottoned on and viola” - this sounds like foreshadowing. I fully expect this to be foreshadowing. Also Scorpius’ blush makes it very clear that yes, the first part of this sentence has already happened and now we’re just waiting on Albus to figure it out.

 

And ahhh, the mistletoe trope - I love it. You wrote all of Albus’ conflicting feelings in this moment so well, and in general you’ve written this whole progression so well. It feels remarkably well-paced for a one-shot, even though I consistently want to bang their heads together because they are very clearly meant to be together, especially because Albus is like “oh yeah this feels natural, why does this feel natural, Scorpius is so much better about acting embarrassed about it” - the whole dynamic here is wonderful.

 

And the Quidditch scene was so great because you got to see all of the Potters and Weasleys interacting (I also love the idea of Dom just playing incredibly dirty at all times and Scorpius playing dirty just to get kicked out of the game), but also, the best part was that kiss because asdrfghjkl they’re adorable.

 

“You’re luck you’re cute, Potter” - Scorpius speaking my thoughts throughout this entire one-shot because WOW was Albus completely oblivious to all of the blatantly clear signs. Anyways, this whole piece was incredibly precious and so well-written and I loved all of it.

 

-Taylor



Name: sunshine_locks (Signed) · Date: 18 Jul 2018 02:04 AM · [Report This]
Story:you make me feel good Chapter: if you can't win, fight dirty

Immediately, I like this story. Any story where Albus branches out and starts dating Scorpius (or anyone his family might look down upon) purely for the Spite™ is my favorite.

 

I love the way Albus is enjoying all of this, lmao. I definitely would do the same, and probably revel in it too.

 

Even though holding hands was no longer strictly necessary, Scorpius hadn’t let go, though he had loosened his grip somewhat so Albus’s fingers weren’t turning purple.” Ooh, they like each other! I know it. Why else would they not let go of each other’s hands?

 

… I seriously love how not seriously they’re both taking this. Albus and Scorpius are both comfortable with each other (to the point of fake dating each other, anyways), and I especially love how they’re planning how they’re going to break up with each other, and debate on who should cheat and who the person should kiss. That’s true friendship, isn’t it?

 

Haha, poor Scorpius is so uncomfortable around Albus’ family, I feel so bad for him. But for the most part Scorpius seems to be comfortable around Albus and doing the whole fake dating thing!

 

Ginny is such a cool mum. I love her. Not reacting to Scorpius being Albus’ supposed boyfriend and casually bringing up safe sex. The mum I aspire to be, truly.

 

I’m super happy to see Molly give Scorpius a jumper—that must be something right? Like a truce? Building bridges? OR something like that. Scorpius is being taken somewhat well, and I’m glad for that; otherwise Christmas might have been truly been hell.

 

“…boyfriends probably didn’t sign Christmas cards with ‘from your favourite loser’…” I think Albus is fine in this respect; I’m pretty sure every couple has dumb names for each other.

 

Albus staring at Scorpius? He likes him. Clearly. Boi you are clearly in denial.

 

You use such eloquent vocabulary—I had to look up what ‘verisimilitude’ meant. Now I know a new word.

 

A tiny detail that I really like is that none of the Potter children seem to be in Gryffindor. I appreciate it when other writers do that because truth be told I get a little tired of it.

 

So. I loved this. Fake dating is one of my absolute favorite tropes, and I’m surprised I don’t see it more often. I should write one. I like how Albus progresses through his emotions (and it was especially funny) and he comes to the conclusion that he wants to date Scorpius.

 

I don’t read Scorbus often (mostly because… I’m lazy) so this was a good start.

 

An amazing read! xx



Name: dirigibleplums (Signed) · Date: 12 Jul 2018 02:40 PM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:you make me feel good Chapter: if you can't win, fight dirty

(review transferred from ao3)

 

my heart is so... warm.

okay no but seriously i love reading fake!dating fics and i love reading about albus potter so to have the two together? in one fic? wow glorious i have been spoiled

i would also like to leave a quick note about how much i enjoyed the little asides here and there about the rest of the family. it really grounded the entire plot, i felt. like how dom is a notorious fouler or george feeds fred's antics or james is a bit of a quidditch nut. every character named directly felt like distinct players and the ones you spent a little more time with were characterised wonderfully. including al and scorpius for that matter, their interactions with each other were precious.

that wasn't really a quick note, but whatever, well done on a fab piece ♡♡



Name: forever_dreaming (Signed) · Date: 04 Jul 2018 06:35 PM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:you make me feel good Chapter: if you can't win, fight dirty

Ohmygodddd Emma I literally cannot stop smiling. My face has broken into two pieces and I have zero regrets because this was THE CUTEST. 

 

Okay so at first I hadn’t read the summary so I forgot this was a fake dating fic and I was basically dying during the entire first section because it was so freakin cute. And then you revealed it was a fake dating AU and it just got even more cute to the point that my heart exploded from all the love I have for these two idiots. 

 

There was just SO MUCH to love about this. Your humor is so effortless and perfect, Emma—from the first line, I was already giggling and smiling like a loon. I loved your characterizations of the other Weasleys and Potters; James as the classic Star Quidditch Player, Teddy as a potions nerd—it’s all lovely and perfect. I especially loved how oblivious Harry was—look, anyone with eyes can tell that Scorpius is bi, geeeez—and Ginny’s matter-of-factness.

 

Your characterization of Albus and Scorpius were THE BEST. I think the moment I fell in love with this fic was when Albus judiciously chose not tell Scorpius that he’s kinda dumb. Like...both of these guys really are idiots. They’re both so flawed and so duuuumb. Scorpius clearly isn’t the best student and too shy and Albus is So Extra—I cannot believe his first instinct when thinking of ways to be interesting for his family was to get a bad boy boyfriend LOL; I feel like that’s really Slytherin of him? I’m so glad that you rejected the general stereotype of Albus being moody and goth and Scorpius being this perfect player and made them both so human and stupid. 

 

They had such delightful chemistry. GAH. I’m still smiling. All I can say is I want more!! Albus has to meet Draco and Astoria okay?? 

 

This was so so lovely Emma. Thanks so much for sharing it. <3 

 

P.S. I kept waiting for them to walk into Harry’s library and go “wow there’s so many DADA books here that’s weird”. Also: a pack of Star Quidditch Players—that was so funny omg. But I feel like the collective noun for Star Quidditch Players should reeeeally be an arrogance of Star Quidditch players hehe. (Did you know that the collective noun for peacocks is a prevention of peacocks? English is weird. Anyway this was highly irrelevant I’m very sorry). 

 

P.P.S. I have a Tumblr post to show you later please remind me to do so! Your characterization of Al and Scorp made me think of it heh.



Name: Stella Blue (Signed) · Date: 04 Jul 2018 12:42 PM · [Report This]
Story:you make me feel good Chapter: if you can't win, fight dirty

Hellllooooo I'm sorry this will be a messy/short review since i'm writing it on my phone in the airport, BUT i just have to say the followig: I LOVED IT this is everything i ever wanted, fake dating and extremely adorable scorbus, this is like an early christmas gift to me. I was grinning like an idiot in hte airport as i read it #noregrets Ok my flight is boarding but just wanted to say this was a m a z i n g. Cute story and your writing style is really enjoyable to read!



Author's Response:

omg this review was SO good -- the idea that you loved it so much that you had to review it even in a hurry??? incredible. I'm so glad you liked the story! If you ever want to see anything else, just name the trope and the pairing and I will tell you if I'm willing to give it a shot! I probably will be, but you know, no promises.



Name: ravenclaw-dirt (Signed) · Date: 30 Jun 2018 10:51 PM · [Report This]
Story:you make me feel good Chapter: if you can't win, fight dirty

I love these two dorks, they're so CUTE!!!



Author's Response:

i'm super glad you love these dorks!!! so do I, it was such a delight to write two utter losers :P thank you for the review!!



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