Reviews For on and on


Name: Renacera (Signed) · Date: 18 Jul 2019 09:47 PM · For: I

I love this piece, Julia. Its length is perfect for its message, and you do an amazing job of portraying the depth of emotion throughout it.

I really connect with this piece. The line about not remembering a time when life was whole really speaks to me. I've actually been struggling with mental health things lately, but reading this made me feel a bit better. There's something about feeling seen that makes things easier to cope with.

Your use of language throughout this feels almost poetic. The alliteration of "listless, lethargic, lonely" is beautiful. It's lilting. And the final line is one I keep coming back to over and over again—"the ever-present sick-nurse, Time." That image is so stunning. It's impactful and resonant and it feels like it echoes at the end of the paragraph. That's lovely.

I can't compliment you enough on your ability to balance brevity with emotional gravity. That shows a huge talent, and I love that I get to see that in this piece. Fantastic job all around. You're amazing.

Best,
Emily



Author's Response:

Thank you so much for your review, Emily!! <3


I'm really sorry you connected with this piece in the way you did, but so glad that you found some sort of solace in this! <3 I know I'm replying a year later, and while I do sincerely wish you're feeling better... well, this story does focus on the fact that that not always the case. In any case, all my love goes out to you!!

I'm also super stoked about the lines that you picked as standing out to you - they are some of my favourites as well, especially the 'listless' one! <3


Love, Julia x
response left to build a sandcastle for the 2020 HC finale!



Name: Dojh167 (Signed) · Date: 18 Jul 2019 12:07 AM · For: I

Haha, I loved your little description of this as a metaphor that developed a conscience. XD

 

I like that you start this with a well known and kind of cliche saying, and then deepen it from there. We hear those kinds of things often enough that they lose all meaning pretty easily, but you’ve put a lot of thought and depth into this.

 

“Of course, everyone hurts” has the feel of another one of those sayings that has just become words. Your speaker seems to acknowledge that there’s a truth in it, but also compares it to something different. It’s almost like the everyone in that saying are the people for whom time heals all wounds, and your speaker feels separate, in a state of being hurt without being healed. 

 

I like your description of the speaker’s adeptness of sustaining their injuries. There’s a sense of pride there, but of course in something that’s very painful, and I honestly related to it. And then you go a step beyond sustaining the injuries as they are, to describe how from there they can grow larger than they started, taking on lives of their own as beasts.

 

And then I like how yo bring back time as the final word, bringing this piece full circle.

 

This was really heartbreaking, but also well written.



Author's Response:

Hi Sam, thank you so much for your review!! <3

 

I really love your interpretation of this! All too often, we're quilty of using the same tired phases to try to provide some comfort (like 'time heals all wounds' and 'everybody hurts'), but I've found that, just as often, these come across as entirely unhelpful or even belittling, so I really wanted to write something that focused on these sayings and turned them upside down, so I love love love that you picked up on that! And yeah, the character has had these injuries for so long, they provide a twisted sort of comfort in their familiarity, if that makes sense. But then of course, the 'sustaining' spirals out of control, and instead the hurt starts to get worse and worse ;_;

 

Love, Julia <3
response left to build a sandcastle for the 2020 HC finale!



Name: justawillowtree (Signed) · Date: 24 Jun 2019 09:10 PM · For: I

Hi Julia! Here for the third of your prize reviews. <3

 

Congratulations on posting your first original fiction to the archives! (At least, the first one that you’ve shown us haha. You know what I mean.) It’s short and sweet and just so pretty. I felt kind of breathless while I read it, because your style is honestly the most beautiful thing. If I had to pick my favorite lines, I would just end up quoting the whole drabble back at you because every single line is like poetry in prose form.

 

I love the story summary, haha, it was quirky and intriguing and made me ever more interested in the actual contents of the drabble. “Presenting: A metaphor that developed a conscience and ran away with it.” Ugh, so good.

 

And the imagery, the personification of sorts of intangible things—all this makes the concept of wrestling with personal injuries/hurts feel much easier to understand when you phrase it like that. Like it’s a beautiful metaphor that can enlighten people at the same time, which is just such an amazing thing to accomplish. I’m fascinated by how the idea of people sustaining their injuries translates into these people carrying their injuries with them, and keeping them ‘safe’ for long periods of time. It treats injuries almost as something valuable because they’ve been there so long, even though we all know they’re awful and painful. I love the way you wrote how little wrongs grow into uncontrollable beasts. The chills I got from that were impressive.

 

Time being a sick-nurse, and the whole piece coming full circle, is just a beautiful, haunting thought, and I loved how you tied it back into this.

 

I really hope I didn’t misinterpret anything too badly. Thank you for sharing this with us <3

 

Love,

Eva



Author's Response:

Eva, thank you so much for your review!! <3

 

Of course you didn't misinterpret anything; as always, you've hit the nail right on the head!

Especially with the bit about keeping injuries safe - the character has had these problems for so long that they can't imagine their life without them, is perhaps even scared to let go of them, which in their mind turns those injuries into something almost precious, even if there's no inherent value to them.
By framing this piece with 'Time', I did want to show how inescapable of a process this is for the character - they've come full circle, yes, and it's a vicious circle because they're now in a worse place than before!

 

xX Julia

response left for the 2020 HC finale, to build a sandcastle!



Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 29 Jan 2019 11:32 PM · For: I

Hey there!

 

I'm here with a review for the Magical Menagerie Review Event as well as the Gryffindor Red vs Gold Review event for January 2019! I'm just scanning through stories on the archives looking for things to read and I came across this. It sounded intriguing so I thought I'd give it a go.

 

Also, before I get started.. can I just say that I adore your author's name? It's so amusing.

 

I like the way that you discuss personal damage in this story. Everyone likes to say that time heals all wounds, but as the main character says, that's no necessarily true. Time might dull the ache. Time might help you forget. But those things are not synonomous with healing.

 

It's sad to think of this character as continually burdened by his or her wounds. I think like him or her, everyone deals with wounds that they carry too, but it seems like she's got quite a bit more going on than the average person.

 

I was pretty impressed that you decided to cover such a deep topic in such a short span of words. I feel like this is something you could easily write thousands upon thousands of words about, but you managed to discuss it easily in under 200 words. Very impressive. And you did it so well too!

 

Good job!

 

~Kaitlin

 



Author's Response:

Hi Kaitlin, thank you so much for your review! Even if it did take me almost a year and a half to respond to it ;_;

 

Yeah, the main character is going through a lot here - and we all get told so often that 'time heals all wounds', but it's not necessarily something that I've found to always be true, so I really wanted to turn that phrase upside down! I'm really glad that you found my take convincing!

 

Love, Julia x

response left to build a sandcastle for the 2020 HC finale!



Name: Chemical_Pixie (Signed) · Date: 19 Jan 2019 11:18 AM · For: I

Here for Gryffindor's January RvG and the Magical Menagerie!! 

 

Drabbles are always interesting to read because they have the unique challenge of capturing an entire thought, mood, and/or story in so few words. And you have met this challenge beautifully!

 

This metaphor of a drabble is really heavy for such a short piece. I love your description of healing wounds: they've been around "healing" for so long that they have begun to fester, and the main character is forced to live with them and is constantly on guard, in the healing process... while, arguably, getting sicker. While the imagery suggests physical wounds, I also draw big connections to mental health, since sometimes it is hard to remember what "normal" feels like, or what "healthy" feels like... and then the "never-starting days" line at the end. Wow. So powerful.

 

I also like how you use Time at the beginning and the end. At first, Time is presented as this omnipotent and omnipresent force, something that is well known and accepted as truth. By the end, however, Time isn't shown in a very flattering light because... this main character is not really healing, and Time is still the sick-nurse. How effective is Time in this person's journey to well being and health? I love how you cast doubt in that... and how you have sparked so much reflection in me as a reader. That takes a considerable amount of skill as a writer, so well done! :) 



Author's Response:

Thank you so much for your review!!

 

Yeah, the imagery I used definitely talks about physical wounds, but in its essence, this story was very much meant to reflect mental health struggles, at least as much if not more so than physical ones! So I'm really pleased that that translated for you! And yes, it's certainly dubious if Time really is a healing force for this character - that's also why I chose to refer to her as a sick-nurse, rather than just as nurse, as you picked up on!

 

x Julia

response left to build a sandcastle for the 2020 HC finale!



Name: teh tarik (Signed) · Date: 18 Jan 2019 03:40 PM · For: I

Hiya!

 

I really loved what you have written here - this is short but is so compact and so profound. I love how tightly wound together this whole metaphor of Time is. It's like a really dense coil that just spirals on and on without end.

 

There's such a deep sense of despair in this whole piece. From the onset, with that first sentence, "time heals all wounds, they say" -- the way you started the piece with a rather overused and hackneyed phrase really sets the generally cynical tone of the whole piece.

 

It's sad to think that the character doesn't remember life as anything wholesome, as anything but this kind of deep festering pain. And how happiness is such a foreign and abstract concept, rather than a reality, or even a possibility for them. :(

 

I also especially liked how the character momentarily moved away from themself to wonder about others, if others deal with their own pain and their own life troubles better than them. It's something so human, something we all do. Even if we're wrapped up in our deepest misery, sometimes we do think about other people - if they handle their lives better than we do. (And of course, sometimes we convince ourselves that they do, and therefore we are insignificant and weak for not being able to deal with ourselves -- and so perpetuates the loop of despair)

 

The last sentence of this just really reinforced the whole despairing tone of the piece. And of course, it ends where it began - with the endless loop of Time, possibly the only thing that is left for the character.

 

This was a very thought-provoking piece of writing, and I really enjoyed this. Great use of second person point of view as well.

 

Thanks for the read!

 

 



Author's Response:

Hi, thank you so much for your review!

 

I love your opening comment so much, thank you! It makes me think of watch mechanisms, and therefore leads me back to the theme of 'time', which I don't think was something I'd really intended when I wrote this, but it's such a neat coincidence :D

I really wanted to convey this sense of despair and hopelessness with this piece, so I'm stoked to see that that translated for you! "it ends where it began" - I think this captures it perfectly! The character really feels like they're stuck in this endless, circular motion, like hands on a clockface, so they don't see an escape route.

 

Love, Julia

response left to build a sandcastle for the 2020 HC finale!



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