So I thought the opening to this story was so effective because everyone knows that Hogwarts is warm and happy but showing that change in the castle is so important to the atmosphere. I can't imagine how Hogwarts had changed but I thought this section was a very vivid depiction of the situation.
I don't write a lot of 2nd war fics but I always really admire a well written Ginny. I think your Ginny is really well characterise because she seems really cool but you've written this lovely vulnerable side to her. It must be really difficult for her to be in this situation especially without Harry but you covered that well in her inner monologue.
I really like the you've brought in Demelza into the story as another friend for Ginny. I think they make such natural friends in this story. I love to see more of Demelza as there aren't a lot of stories about her. I feel like she has a lot to offer as a character if written well. Ginny's right hand woman :P I'm hoping we're going to see some kick ass girl power.
I never thought about what they might do about the new muggleborns coming into Hogwarts. You couldn't really ask muggleborns into a world which they would be in great danger so I'm happy that The Order are taking care of it. I can't remember if it was mentioned in canon but I like it.
I look forward to see where you're taking this piece because this chapter seems very promising!
- Abbi xo
For: Magical Menagerie
I'm here for a review for the Magical Menagerie review event on the forums and also for the Gryffindor Red vs Gold Review Battle for January! I'm super excited to see what you came up with for this challenge as I love the theme of women supporting other women.
Aww. I know this is a dark story, but I thought you made it feel very warm. You can really see the bond between Demelza and Ginny (as well as between Luna and Ginny). It's nice to know that even in that darkness they were all facing, they could support each other.
It's sad to think of all the people that would've had to run. I imagine Dean's absence must've been felt greatly by the remaining Gryffies. Just another reminder of how screwed up the wizarding world was.
I do have one crit/question. You mention Dennis and Colin being there, but they were muggleborn. I'm fairly certain that they didn't attend that year of school for fear of being captured. I think if I recall correctly, Colin shows up at the battle and sneaks in. If it's meant to be AU, all good. Just something I wanted to ask about.
I really liked how you filled Demelza out in this and made her a more three dimensional character. In the books, we don't really get to learn much about her, but here you make her a kind and understanding friend. She really exemplifies Gryffindor well.
Good work on this! I'm sure you'll do well in the challenge.
Thanks so much for this review - I really wasn't expecting anyone to read it this soon. I just posted it. :O you are a star.
Your comments are so lovely. I want to make this a more supportive, warm story even while all the dark stuff is going on so it's great to know I've hit the mark.
Also, thank you for catching that terrible blunder - this is definitely not AU and that was a stupid mistake. It's all fixed now. Phew. :P
I'm honestly terrible at review responses - all I can say is thank you, thank you x1000 for coming to read this.