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Name: Dojh167 (Signed) · Date: 17 Dec 2017 01:29 AM · [Report This]
Story:Not Really Functional (During Heartbreak Healing) Chapter: no one's ever broken up with me...

Breakups are always hard, but you made this one sting even more by starting with Hannah being so happy.

 

I certainly am not a fan of Rose here. Not just for hurting Hannah so abruptly, but her reasoning seems really off to me. She says she wants an adult relationship, but she doesn’t actually say what’s not “adult” about the relationship, just what’s not “adult” about Hannah. I know firsthand that childish people can certainly have adult relationships. Also, the fact that she says they could maybe be together in a couple of months, to me really suggests that Rose isn’t thinking about things in as an adult a way as she acts.

 

Hannah has a couch and a dog? That’s super adult!

 

While I do feel sorry for Hannah, I can’t help but laugh at her just a little, like when she says she’s too heartbroken or too lazy to figure out how to change the channel and when she’s trying to convince the dog to calm down because she’s heartbroken.

 

I’m confused regarding Louisa Longbottom. Is the Hannah Abbott going by a different name? Or maybe that Hannah died which is why our Hannah is named after her?

 

Oh wow, and then in the end Lorcan met someone? Or was about too? Shame we didn’t get to see that.

 

This was a fun piece - I think you did a really good job of letting Hannah’s personality shine through in both the dialogue and description (hehe geddit)

 

Sam.



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