Hey there Taylor! I'm here for our swap :D
Have I told you that I LOVE your version of James? Because I absolutely love your version of James. I think I've said that to you before, but I'm happy to say it again. It's always a little bit of a toss-up for me to read Jily fics because I quite frequently hate the way that people portray James - as basically a rude, cocky jerk who harasses Lily until she caves. I personally think that's disrespectful to James AND to Lily.
You portray James in such a fun, loveable and refreshing way! I love how dorky and clueless he is here - while still being very thoughtful! A picnic by the lake sounds so romantic and is a great setting for him to confess his feelings - even though it turned out to be a date (it's also a great date, so that works fine!).
Your dialogue was on point, and so was James's internal dialogue. It was clear that he's a funny, witty guy even though he was panicking and making a dork of himself :'D
I also love, love, love your version of Lily! The main thing that stands out to me about her is that she's so confident. I loved reading a story where Lily is so comfortable around James and loves to laugh and joke around (and even... not quite "play pranks", but the fact that she told Sirius about the "friend who's a boy" thing? HAH, I love it), and she's not just an irritable stick-in-the-mud the whole time.
This was such a fun and adorable story, and a really great read! Thanks for the swap, Taylor! ^.^ Until next time!
Taylor - I love me a Jily and I'm SO glad I clicked on this - I'm actually amazed I haven't already tbh! James is the most oblivious bloke I've ever come across - I mean for someone who has asked Lily out so much, how is it that he managed to miss the fact they're actually dating?! I think it's hilarious that Sirius, Remus and Peter all seem to know and they think he's completely daft too and have just left him to it. Though I did think your James is just the sweetest - it was like as soon as he thought there was a real possibility Lily would say yes to going out with him, he got really nervous. It just shows how much he really does like her, bless him. I thought Lily was great too - she just deals with him being oblivious because he's cute.
I loved the ending: "His girlfriend is most definitely going to be the death of him, but he's so damn happy about being able to call her his girlfriend that, all things considered, he thinks that'd be a pretty damn good way to go." - so sweet!!
I finished this with a big grin on my face - fluff is totally where I am at the moment. Torturing characters and making them cry just makes me cry so I'm taking all the fluff I can get and this was the fluffiest. I mean, a picnic date - it was perfect! Great job!
Tasha - Gryffindor CTF - Team Gold xxx
Hi! I am here to review for the April 2019 Capture the Flag.
Oh my goodness, this story is just the cutest thing.
I love the way you have characterized James by showing us him in a nervous state. We see so little of him in the books—just being a bully and then being dead (and a little bit as a ghost) so I really like to see how you’ve filled in some of that gap. There had to be some sort of transition between being a git and being a hero—and Lily had to fall for him somehow.
I particularly like the detail where he is desperately trying to get his hair to lie down flat. He’s spent so many years showing off by keeping it a mess that this moment is so adorable.
All the scenarios that you mention him imagining are hilarious, especially the one about Lily eloping with the Giant Squid. And I can totally picture the house elves stuffing a picnic basket for the young lovers.
Lily and James’s banter is also adorable. I like that you’ve shown her as such a spitfire and that she is so comfortable with him. And I love how he’s having such a hard time keeping his mind on what she is saying—because he’s about to take such a risk.
And then the twist where she starts laughing and he hadn’t prepared for that scenario—perfect. She’s obviously the quicker of the two. Her explaining to him (as though he were a toddler) that they are already dating is priceless. Especially the ‘friend who is a boy’ line.
The ending where Sirius throws that line in James’s face to tease him really cracked me up. And the last bit about Lily being the death of James and that being a good way to go—just adorable.
I really enjoyed this!
hey taylor, i'm here for our swap!
so this was possibly the fluffiest thing i've read lately and it was so good! you've thrown in fair bits of humour in it but it still managed to be romantic and fluffy and lovely :D
i love the idea of james and lily dating and then he's just...so confused that he doesn't even realise they are, in fact, dating :P that the rest of the marauders knew about it for a month and just let him do his thing and only roll their eyes at him just makes the whole thing funnier (and to be honest, i can actually imagine them doing just that for the heck of it because they would probably think it's hilarious....which it is).
your james is very cute, i love how when things actually might matter, like when there's a real possibility that lily might actually say yes to going out with him, his cocky side is totally in the background and he ends up being just a boy who really really likes this girl and he's worried she might not like him back. and it's easy to imagine him like you've written him as being canon *_*
and of course, lily telling everyone what james actually thought was great - i love imagining her as this brave, mischievous girl, not like...a goody two shoes or hermione2.0 because i can't imagine someone like james falling for someone who wasn't at least a little bit playful and all that :D
Howdy Taylor! I have arrived (on an hour's eve of a day late) for our swap!
This story jumped out at me because Jily and I'm VERY glad I chose it. It was a fun, funny, and fluid read - it felt like it was over so fast, but in a good way!
I thought the characterizations of James and Lily were great. James was exactly as I'd imagine him in a light-hearted coming-together scenario for the two, dramatically overthinking things and being so blinded by Lily and his feelings for her that he totally misses reality. Lily is a very forgiving girlfriend for a month of obliviousness, but the way she's become so relaxed and open to GOOD reactions to him.
Perhaps my favorite line of the whole story though was the nod to what actually happens - Sirius going to Azkaban for trying to avenge James's death. It's NOT so light-hearted knowing what we know, but you manage to still make it read that way within the story so - awesome! My second favorite had to be the bit about the Giant Squid. I have a soft spot for the Giant Squid already to be fair, but the absurdity of the idea of Lily eloping with the Squid was the PERFECT cherry on top of the panicked state of mind that is so uniquely James.
Thanks a zillion for writing and sharing this with the world!
Aww, James being nervous about asking out Lily is adorable! I love how respectful he is towards Lily as well; unfortunately not something I see very often.
A picnic date is the cutest thing I’ve ever heard, tbh. They sound really fun.
You know, it is so in character for James to not realize that he was going out with the girl of his dreams—yeah, he would be that oblivious. Lily’s reaction is warranted.
Sirius’ reaction especially had me in splits, because of course he would say that. “Friend that is a boy,” is the funniest line I’ve heard today.
James and Lily were actually so in character, and it’s very easy to see pieces of what we’ve seen in the series in here. You’ve got a great handle on their personalities, which is one of the reasons I absolutely enjoy your Jily fics. I personally find it hard to write them, so I’ve honestly just given up on them!
Thank you for sharing this funny story!
I absolutely love this. "Friend that is a by" LOL THAT IS SO SIRIUS!
Please do bring more of your unpublished stories out. They're absolutely hilarious <3
it's definitely right up sirius' alley to bring that up purely to embarass james, lol. anyways, so happy you enjoyed this!! <3
Taylor! Here for our swap.
Okay... okay... okay. I have a cheesy grin on my face. This fic is so cute on so many levels.
But also... MY HEART TAYLOR, WHAT IS WITH ALL THIS FORESHADOWING OF DEATH AND DESPAIR?!
James is absolutely adorable in this story. I love how you expose his vulnerabilities. It makes him even more loveable. You really build up his nerves and anticipation in asking out Lily Evans, after all, his feelings for her have grown exponetially and there is so much at stake here.
The signs on which he is reflecting are so blatantly obvious, meaning that Lily likes him and is flirting with him, that of course I can totally relate to him second guessing EVERYTHING. Because if it's obvious, then CLEARLY you're misreading the situation, am I right?! lol, we've all been there (or most of us anyway), and it's both fun and agonizing to watch him squirm (and cheer him on, of course!)
Lily's reaction is amazing. I LOVE how she already assumes that they're dating, and I LOVE how she doesn't second guess herself about it. She's so confident in her feelings for him and in their relationship, she doesn't back down into an embarrassed "Oh, aren't we dating?" This is such a great way to have the "defining the relationship" discussion, too. James is such a blubbering, loveable idiot here, and Lily is a gem. I love them together. :)
But, as you might have noticed near the beginning of my review, I did catch your little snippets of foreshadowing and despair. Sirius going to Azkaban? Lily being the death of him? Merlin, Taylor. You really know how to pull the fluffy rug from underneath our feet. You might has well titled this piece "Dumb Jily Thing, and by the way, Lily and James are murdered in 4 years' time and Sirius is blamed for it." ;) As much as I love reading your fluff, I LOVE how you threw in some heartbreak in it!!!
Oh, my Merlin! I love this! I love it so much! Dunno why I took so long to come here after your request, honestly... I really needed some Jily fluff/humour tonight! <3
And I'm an idiot, because I was so into James' head that I didn't see this coming at all. Although, I was like, they are having lunch together at the lake... isn't that a date already? But I sort of shrugged it off... well, whatever...
But anyway, James is such a dork! And I love him for that! His nervousness is just so cute, and I loved all the scenarios he created in his head... (although that bit about Sirius ending up in Azkaban for avenging him made me sad... that, and James thinking that Lily would be the death of him, but still worth it... I know this story is hilariously silly and that those details are meant to be silly too, but I can't help but read them as tragic foreshadowing... you know what I mean, don't you? Also, I'm sorry...)
Lily's reaction was so perfect! Honestly, both of them were just perfect! You captured their characters and their relationship so well, I love it! I'm sure I could say a lot more about this, but I can't think of anything, except this was so funny and sweet and adorable and I'm in love! <3 <3 <3
Thank you so much for requesting, dear! It was an absolute pleasure! Please, send all the fluffy Jilys my way! <3 <3 <3
Yes, this is a bit of humorous fluff, but fun to read when one has been overdosing on an endless stream of angsty stories. A nice reminder that teenagers are not all spiraling down into the drain of despair. And yet that statement leads one to remember that these two happy teenagers will be heading into an environment of fear, danger, and death in the not too distant future.
Begone, you tragic thoughts, and let us enjoy the moment -- James overthinking the whole issue of their dating status, and Lily lovingly amused by his clueless wishfulness. It is fun to see James's transformation from anxiety to utter happiness in such a short time. If only life were always so rewarding.
i'm glad you enjoyed the little moment of humorous fluff - they've definitely got a less-than-fluffy future ahead of them, but for now, they're happy teenagers and we can pretend that's not happening. james definitely overthinks quite a bit here, but it pays off in the form of both humor and happiness. haha, yes indeed, if only real life was always that rewarding!
thanks for reviewing!
I'm here for our review swap and for the Gryffindore Red vs. Gold Review Battle - February 2019! (On a side note, how is it February already? What happened to January?)
I think you might be one of the very few writers who could make me excited to read a James/Lily piece. You write them so well together and in such a convincing fashion. I love all of the different scenarios you've come up with for how they end up together.
The beginning of this really shows how James has matured. Instead of arrogantly and incessantly asking Lily out, he's nervous. You can tell her really wants the moment to be meaningful and special to her. The amount of thought he's putting into it is really cute.
I love the idea of them having a picnic together (although I did think at that point that it's odd that they'd have a lakeside picnic as a friend get together since it seems like a date activity). It's cute that the elves load James up with so much food. That seems so fitting for elves. Maybe James can save the leftovers for some latenight Marauder snacks.
It was fun watching James was trying to figure out how to finally ask Lily out. Cat stories aren't very good tangents to "Will you go out with me?" I'm glad he finally just blurted it out.
OMG. I laughed so hard at Lily's response. James truly is oblivious. I thought his description of the picnic date seemed odd for a just friends get together. It seems just like him to not notice that he'd been dating the girl of his dreams for several weeks. That is amazing.
As soon as he asked Lily not to tell his friends, I knew there was no way she wouldn't. I mean, I'd imagine she'd want to take the mickey out of him just as much as they would. That's way too funny to keep a secret.
And Sirius the next morning, yes! That was the perfect way to end it.
This was lovely! Your writing was really smooth and moved at a nice pace. The way you moved between James' thoughts and what was actually happening was easy to follow. Overall, a very nice fluffy sweet piece of goodness!
Hi Taylor! Here for February's RvG.
Ah, fluffy Jily! I'm always happy to read stories like this one where you're not torturing your poor readers with breaking down relationships or killing off favourite characters or something :P
James was so adorable in this story! Right from the very beginning, when he was building up to asking Lily out and he was so nervous about it - it was just so cute to read. I know we see him asking her out in the flashback in OotP but it's so clear here that asking her out this time really means something to him, and reading about all the different possibilities that he's concocted in his mind was kind of hilarious. I swear, James overthinks things more than I do, and that's saying something.
I want to know just exactly what he thought was going to happen when he asked Lily out that one fifth of the versions in his head ended up with someone in Azkaban. Does he have experience of that being a consequence of asking someone on a date??
Although the Sirius one I can kind of see happening, to be honest.
Then learning about what James and Lily had been doing in the last couple of weeks - the kisses on the cheek, hanging out away from other friends or outside of Heads duty - was so hilarious. The poor boy has been trying to pluck up the courage to ask her out for this long and he hasn't even realised that they're already going out. I can definitely picture the cocky James that we see in the flashback being so unsure and oblivious when he eventually gets to go out with Lily that he doesn't even realise it's happening at first. It takes the phrase "can't believe my luck" to a whole new level, doesn't it?
Lily's reaction is just priceless, too. I would have loved for someone to have a camera in that moment and capture the look on her face as she just bursts into laughter when she learns that James hasn't even realised that they're dating. I kind of feel like that moment probably captures the dynamic of their relationship pretty well.
'friend that is a boy' is probably my favourite part of this story, and of course Lily won't promise not to share the fact James didn't know that they were dating - there's far too much potential there! I really liked the last few lines, and the way that it just captured the dynamic of the relationship and Lily's friendship with the other Marauders so well.
This was really cute and I loved reading it - thank you for some fluff after all that heartbreaking you've been doing recently with your writing!