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Name: Felpata_Lupin (Signed) · Date: 14 Jul 2019 02:58 PM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Creatures of the Dark

Oooh! Hope like Remus' mother! For some reason I never made that connection? Maybe because I'm too focused on my own headcanon for Remus' mother and I tend to forget her canon name? And yes, I know this is completely irrelevant to the chapter, also because in this story Teddy doesn't even really have a sister (which is a pity, because I bet it would have made dealing with things easier... losing your parents when you are an only child is makes it even worse!)

Okay, sorry for the useless digression... let's start again...

Hello, dear! Here for our swap! :)

But... what did you do with this chapter?!

I'm not sure what the worst part was... if the fact that Leo died at all, if the way Teddy found out (on his birthday, no less)... if the absolutely terrifying nightmare that followed... is he really blaming himself for his parents' death? He must know that there was nothing he could've ever done... but of course knowing these things rationally doesn't help being convinced in the deep of your subconscious feelings... it's all even more terrible because he could've grown up into a loving, supportive family... and now the guilt for what happened to Leo is going to add up... why did you kill him?! He was the one good thing Teddy had in his life!!! Why?!

I also really, really wish that Teddy had explained what exactly he'd seen on the news. To Ginny, or even to Andromeda. I can understand why he wouldn't though... it's so hard to voice those things, especially when they are so fresh and you are still in shock. It still makes me so sad that Teddy refuses any support he might get (this is not the first time he does so).

The way he snapped to Andromeda... again, I can understand it, it's a normal reaction. But even if Andromeda wasn't the kind of person she is, any parental figure would've got angry at that kind of outburst. At least at first. I hope they'll talk it through? Although I think it's too much to hope for...

This was so heartbreaking... I'm just so, so sad now... hope you are proud...

Great writing, btw. It was incredibly gripping!

Thank you for the swap!

Chiara



Name: ReillyJade (Signed) · Date: 14 Jul 2019 12:42 AM · [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Creatures of the Dark

Hello, darlin'! Here w/ your Chapter 6 request! 

 

I don't know what it was about the introduction for this chapter, but it gave me a feeling of dread. I think it had something to do with Teddy's mindset about birthdays never really changing anything... it just gave me bad vibes. Like, on this particular birthday, something would change, and not in a good way. And then THAT happened... ugh. It was like a punch to the gut. What made it so effective was that I, like Teddy, was completely taken aback by the news. (Yes, I know I just said I thought something bad was going to happen, but that certainly was not what I was expecting.) It did seem very unlike Leo to be late, so I should've figured something was wrong, but I almost couldn't believe something could've happened to Leo considering he's the ONE good thing in Teddy's life. Omg. :( 

 

Somehow, I feel like Teddy's interactions with the Potters are even more heartbreaking (or at least an equal amount of heartbreaking). Despite his politeness and their obvious warmth, he's just so removed from them. Like, he's physically there, but emotionally... he just isn't. It's really said, since it's so apparent how much they all love him.

 

I think they nightmare at the end about his parents (which was incredibly well written, by the way) made Leo's death all the more poignant. While Leo's death obviously isn't Teddy's fault, I can understand why, in the moment, he was blaming himself; I think anyone would. But, when the nightmare reminds him about how his parents' deaths are "his fault" (they're totally not!), it just shows how deeply Teddy is locked into this vicious circle of pain and self-loathing. I really, really hope things start to look up for him soon. This poor kid needs a break!

 

Cheers,

Reilly



Name: Stella Blue (Signed) · Date: 13 Jul 2019 04:36 PM · [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Happier Times

Hello! It’s been so long that you’d probably forgotten you even requested a review from me in the first place, but here it is! I’m so sorry for taking this long!

 

Ahhh, Teddy being the last one not paired up for a partner project is bringing up all sorts of buried memories of middle school, ahahaha. So I sympathize. Poor Teddy.

 

Observation: Teddy seems unusually focused on this boy’s smile. In the future this will totally become a crush. I’m probably about 100% sure.

 

The fact that Teddy procrastinates for five hours working up the nerve to ask his Gran if he can go meet  up with someone to work on a school project says a lot. The nature program he’s watching seems to be escapism at its finest.


Teddy’s behavior and thought patterns really make sense for the type of abuse he receives from his Gran.  The way he second-guesses himself all the time and his sense of self worth is so low, the way he tries to  make himself invisible and not make waves, that’s exactly the effect I’d expect considering his Gran’s  criticism, and neglect of his emotional needs, etc. This kid needs to see a therapist, stat. I’m worried about  him :( Anyway in my opinion the way you’ve written how he’s adapted to this trauma is very believable.

 

Leo has “dreamy” eyes? I take that back about what I predicted of Teddy’s “future” crush on him, he has  a crush *right now*, and it’s adorable.

 

I love that the character in their story takes on a life of her own and becomes someone they weren’t  expecting her to be. True facts about writing.

 

Aw, it’s sad (though not unexpected) that Teddy can’t stay longer to work on that story with Leo! But…  perhaps his Gran has a point because I think Teddy would stay out there for hours working on that story  with his new friend/crush if he didn’t have to leave, haha. And then he actually wouldn’t do his other  homework. Still, I hope they have time to work together on it more later. It’s nice to see Teddy having fun  and not being stressed. He’s just a kid, so it’s great when he can just relax and be a kid.


Great chapter!



Name: VaguelyCreativeName (Signed) · Date: 12 Jul 2019 09:01 PM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Would I even be okay?

Hey sunshine, I’m finally here with the review you requested! I’m sorry it took so long…

 

I saw that you won ‘Most Inclusive Story’ in the Nargles, so congratulations! It’s so well deserved! Now onto the very delayed review: I love how at the start of the chapter, you’ve pretty much put individual sentences as separate paragraphs, I feel like that really reflects Teddy’s exhaustion and distress over Leo’s death, if that makes sense. Like, Teddy is so tired and miserable that he can’t bring himself to connect his thoughts, there’s no coherence in his life anymore, sort of like Leo was the glue holding it all together, and now with him gone, Teddy just notices things sporadically without really connecting with any of them. I might be reading entirely too much into this, but that’s what it felt like to me and I thought it was an ingenious, incredibly clever way to reflect Teddy’s emotional state in your narration.

 

It’s so sad to see how he gets treated at school, and I don’t really know what’s worse, the other kids staring and laughing at Teddy or the English teacher trying to make him feel better by giving him Leo’s story but refusing to acknowledge Teddy’s suffering and not talking to him. At least Vega tries to comfort him, and I wonder if she’s gone through something similar to Teddy, since she said she knew what he felt like, and since she seems to be able to read Teddy’s reactions quite well for never having talked to him before. Of course, she can’t fill Leo’s shoes, but it’s good to know that there is at least someone at school who’s willing to look out for Teddy.

 

The interaction between Teddy and Andromeda was really interesting – it’s good to see Teddy finally standing up to his Gran, and confronting her about her behaviour, even if she brushes him off and admonishes him, and even makes Teddy doubt for a moment whether Leo even ever existed. At the same time, it doesn’t seem like she’s being deliberately hurtful or obtuse, so I really wonder what’s going on there... Maybe she has some form of early on-set Alzheimer’s? But Teddy is so sure of his Gran not being sick, it’s very puzzling.

 

All the ways in which Teddy tries to avoid thinking about Leo, like how he desperately throws himself into his coursework, and how he avoids sleep because he’s afraid of nightmares are so very deeply sad. His dread the next morning about having to get ready for the day, when even having to make himself look presentable is too much of an effort, like an insurmountable task is very real, too, and I liked how the Potters’ visit brought out so many complicated feelings for Teddy, like how he knows they’re not trying to make him feel uncomfortable, but that doesn’t mean that he feels any less so, and how his instinctual reaction to Harry and Ginny questioning his Gran’s parenting abilities is to defend them, even when moments ago, Teddy was criticising Andromeda himself. Like, at the moment, Teddy’s emotions are understandably a whole complicated mess, and it seems like he doesn’t always know how he will respond.

 

And, God, Andromeda really can be so horrid, there’s no way around it. She’s making Teddy feel awful about the littlest things, and she absolutely shows no compassion for him, like the way her housekeeping appears to others is more important to her than her grandson’s wellbeing, even after he’d finally told her that his best friend died only the night before, she doesn’t care that he’s been struggling and missing school because he can’t cope, but only that his marks have dropped because of a few missed assignments. She can be a horrible, horrible person in the way she treats Teddy, and I’m glad Harry and Ginny were finally present to witness the abuse she puts him through and to hopefully intervene in a meaningful way.

 

Also, all there were so many little details about Teddy’s emotional state in this that were absolutely heart-breaking, like how he seems to constantly blame himself for Leo’s death, and how he seems to revert into old patterns with the way he dissociates so utterly and frequently; I feel like we hadn’t witnessed that quite as much in recent chapters, but with Leo gone, Teddy reverts back into the behaviour he exhibited in the first couple of chapters, before Leo drew him out of his shell.

 

This was such a deeply sad, but fantastic chapter! Much Love,

            Julia



Name: toomanycurls (Signed) · Date: 10 Jul 2019 06:52 PM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Nightmare

DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY I'M SHOUTING?????????????

I've read a lot of AUs where Remus and Tonks are alive post-DH BUT YOU'RE THE FIRST ONE TO KILL THEM AFTER LETTING THEM LIVE. How could you??? I need to go change my answer to your knife/flower poll :P 

So, obviously I'm a bit hooked on this and have a lot of questions. You are not allowed to give me hope and happiness about Teddy being raised by his parents only to rip it all away. :( :( :( :( :(

Did Teddy have a nightmare or a vision or both? I really felt like I was in the moment with him through the confusion and fear -- you showed all of that really well. 

You gave me all the emotions with this and I'm really glad I picked this to read. 

-Rose



Author's Response:

L M F A O  THIS IS THE FUNNIEST REVIEW I’VE GOTTEN!! I’m glad to have gotten the honor of first then, lol. Suddenly the distribution on that poll makes a lot more sense cause I got people who thought I was scary for real!

 

It was a nightmare! He was reliving the events, haha!

 

Thanks for reading, I hope you continue to! xx

 

 



Name: Chemical_Pixie (Signed) · Date: 09 Jul 2019 01:45 AM · [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Would I even be okay?

Hey! Here for our second swap! :) 

 

This is such a heavy, heavy chapter. There is so much packed in here, from Teddy going back to school to him encountering his Gran's dementia to speaking with Leo's mum to Harry and Ginny's visit... everything has really bogged him down, and I feel so bad for Teddy. 

 

I relate to this chapter quite well, unfortunately, when I lost someone really close to me. Going back to normal life was bizarre and isolating and everything felt really empty. There were people, like Vega, who reached out, and while I appreciated the gesture, I was a little wary of them like Teddy is with Vega. (Sidenote, I think they could have a great friendship if Teddy lets her in, and I'm really hoping so with how things are going with him.) And then talking of funerals is a bit of a disaster, too, because that's really the last thing you want to think about, and it kind of finalizies the death of the loved one... But what really got me was Teddy double guessing whether or not Leo was real. After all, that person is gone forever, and your brain has a hard time processing it. Where they ever there? Can you remember the sound of their voice or what they said that one time? Teddy's Gran does not help the situation at all with her denying Leo's existence, and I'm lucky enough where that hasn't happened to me, but I have been in a situation where someone remembers my loved one in a different way than I have, and this person is trying to manipulate me into thinking differently about my loved one, doubting myself... it's such a horrible feeling, one that I don't wish on anyone. I suppose what I am trying to say is that you have written Teddy's sense of loss incredibly well here, and I can relate to it so much.

 

Another thing that I am curious about is how Leo's story is going to end. I hope that Teddy continues it, as a way to honor Leo's memory. Plus, this is where Teddy found some happiness. And I've found that writing has been very therapeutic for me (that's how my novel WIP, A Place Not Far From Here got started). It may be painful now for Teddy to write the rest of their story, but I hope that one day, he'll be able to revisit the story and continue.

 

I'm curious to know the access to mental health that Teddy has... now that Harry and Ginny are finally a little more in tune with what's going on, I hope they pull through and help him in a way that he so desparately needs. 

 

Another heartbreaking but well written chapter!

 

[PS I just got your lovely review on AWP. I'd be happy to swap-- but my review for our third swap will have to wait until later this week... gahhh! I can't believe that I'm only one chapter away of being all caught up!]



Author's Response:

I cannot tell you how much this review helped me out though. I've felt down before, but grief is a foreign feeling for me, and I wasn't sure just how well I got grief across. I'm super glad that you were able to relate to it, and it eases a few of my worries about not showing grief enough. I absolutely did my research before trying to write it, but the articles I read were more intellectual than they were emotional, and it was hard to translate something intellectual into feeling, you know? I also read this chapter more times than I can count, and at a certain point it just felt like rereading and I was compltely unable to guage the emotions going on here, and as a result, I didn't really know how to improve it. 

 

This chapter was very intentional, but for Teddy it was just a whole mess for him. There were too many things going and a lot emotions that he didn't know how to deal with so it all sort of exploded at the end. His Gran... hm. At this point, a little less than half the things she does and says are unintentional, but the impact of her actions clearly show with how Teddy feels about her and everything around him. 

 

Right now, I think the thought of Leo's story will hurt a lot for Teddy to think about, as it was a place of happiness, and it just reminds him of what he just lost. I think one day, he will be able to come back, but right now, I don't think it's possible for him.  As for us both, I know that writing is incredibly therapeutic! That's how this novel began for me as well! But I think it'll be a while before it becomes that for Teddy, if at all. 

 

Thank you for your lovely review, and thanks for reading too! xx



Name: Felpata_Lupin (Signed) · Date: 07 Jul 2019 08:46 PM · [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Song and Dance

Back for our swap! :)

Okay, but... what is it with the knife thing? Where were all those tragic thoughts coming from? Is it about the way his parents died? Or just some stupid trick of his mind for no apparent reason? And is it somehow related to the Burrow incident? I'm sensing a pattern there...

It was nice to see Teddy and Leo attempting to cook together, though. I really just enjoy seeing Teddy and Leo together in general. :) And I love that Leo has so many interests as well, he's such a cheerful, positive force. :)

I was surprised by the family tree... also, I wonder why Andromeda wasn't cut off in this reality... wasn't her marriage with Teddy seen as a betrayal in this? It seems like there is a story behind it, and I'm curious to know... I'm actually very curious about any background regarding Andromeda, because she's still a bit of a puzzle to me in this story...

Talking of which... what was that whole coffee shop scene about? Why did she suddenly decide that she wanted to spend time with her grandson? And what is it about her asking who Leo was? It almost felt as if she was another person entirely? I really have trouble figuring her out...

But it's nice that she took the time to read the story and that she complimented Teddy for it, at least? And that she seemed to genuinely care for once? Anyway, whatever...

The scene when Leo almost got run over by a car was indeed scary, glad his mum was quick to stop him. Poor Teddy, watching the whole thing, it must've scared him to death... but nothing bad happened, so it's all good.

Another interesting chapter. Thank you so much for swapping.

Lots of love,

Chiara



Name: Felpata_Lupin (Signed) · Date: 07 Jul 2019 07:48 PM · [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Through Fishbowls

Hi! Here for our swap! :)

One thing I need to say straight away: I love Leo! He's such a fun and sweet kid and he seems to be such a good friend for Teddy! I'm so glad that he and Teddy found each other and became so close, it's nice that they can watch out for each other, especially since it looks like they are already being targeted by bullies? Or at least, it looks like Teddy is? Which doesn't really surprise me, considering how wary and insecure he seems to be... :(

I found your take on the houses interesting. I would've never thought to apply the same concept of houses to a Muggle AU, but why not, after all? I love that Leo and Teddy are from opposing houses but are still best friends. Interesting how they don't really fit in their houses' archetype, either. But of course, Leo, since you have that name and that zodiacal sign, you could only belong in the house of lions :P

The Burrow scene saddened me a lot. The way Teddy was feeling so out of place and so anxious of being a burden... and then the way he panicked while washing the dishes... someone should tell him that it's okay to make mistakes... but I suppose that's not what Andromeda has thrust into his head... :/ I wish he would at least open up with Ginny or some other adult, they might be able to help... :( I'm glad calling Leo helped distracting him, at least...

Nice chapter. I'll move on to the next now.



Name: Chemical_Pixie (Signed) · Date: 06 Jul 2019 01:36 PM · [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Creatures of the Dark

Hey! Here for part five of our first swap! (Thanks for your patience!)

 

Noooooo! Poor Teddy!!! And Leo?! What?! That can't be. Oh my goodness, this is so devastating. Is it impossible for Teddy Lupin to ever catch a break? 

 

I like how nuanced the beginning of the chapter is, with Teddy finally going to the Potters after a long time apart. The Potter kids are adorable here, and Teddy is so understanding of how they act, though I think he's a little oblivious to how much they idolize him. Teddy is really polite, having let Albus lean on him and everything, but that also showcases that he doesn't make his boundaries clear. While it might now "matter" as much in this situation, it will later on. I love how you make Teddy's most endearing qualities also some of his biggest flaws, too. It goes to show that personality traits are on a spectrum, and somtimes they're over/under emphasized.

 

Leo... that... ugh. Poor Teddy. I'm devasted because Leo brough such light to Teddy's life, and I loved every scene with him in it. I really, really hope that Teddy gets some counseling because of this. I think to myself: Why are Ginny and Harry seem so oblivious to Teddy's hardships, especially if Harry was in a similar situation in his childhood? But then again... I think this shows how misunderstood Teddy feels, so this addition of the Potters is necessary. And then his Gran... oh Andromeda. She needs help, too, but I fear that she's too prideful to get it, and it's really taking a toll on Teddy...

 

As for the dream, I think this is the most heartbreaking aspect of the chapter. Speaking from experience, having dreams about departed loved ones can range from heartfelt to absolutely terrifying, and I think you capture this range well. This is such a difficult topic to write about, and I think you do it justice. 

 

This is such a sad chapter, and I really hope that Teddy is on the path to wellbeing soon. I'll be back soon with our second swap---and to see what happens, of course!



Author's Response:

Teddy Lupin will catch a break! Just not now. A few more other things have to happen first, and then things will get better. 

 

Yeah, Teddy doesn't know how to enforce his boundaries much because he hates the fact that he might make others angry, so he just doesn't. And yeah, you're right, it does become a pain in the neck. You're so right about personality traits being on a spectrum though, it's not usually like you have cherrypicked virtues and flaws that are completely different from each other, they all relate in one way or another! 

 

I've gotten a lot of comments on Harry and Ginny's behaviour and though I have reasoning, it's a little hard for me to explain. They do notice, but for a few reasons, they don't act. It's just that a lot of Teddy's struggle is internal so his family doesn't see a lot of it, and what behaviors he does show, come off as just as a part of Teddy, just nothing too much to be worried of, you know? There is also the fact that they don't see Andromeda as often as Teddy does, so her toxicity is a lot harder to put down. Not to mention, even if Harry and Ginny wanted to take care of Teddy, they have to deal with the situation in a way that considers Teddy's own thoughts and feelings. It's... a flawed sort of reasoning, but Harry and Ginny aren't perfect, but they are willing to try, and that makes all the difference. To Teddy anyways, eventually. 

 

Teddy has quite a few dreams, but they're not all nightmares. There's a whole range of things going on there. 

 

I hope I answered or cleared some of your doubts. I had to keep it vague, for Reasons. 

 

Thanks for reading! xx



Name: Chemical_Pixie (Signed) · Date: 02 Jul 2019 02:21 AM · [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Song and Dance

Hey! Here for your swap! 

 

It's always so nice to jump back into this story. It's so well written. Sure, the subject matter is a difficult topic, but you write it with such boldness. You don't shy away from these feelings, and you really highlight the struggles people with anxiety (and who are living in toxic situations) have. 

 

One line that particularly got to me was this: He felt like a slave to everything but himself.

 

I mean... yes. Everything about this is... yes. It is so, so true. The powerlessness that Teddy feels about everything. I do want to give him a hug, but I know that it would only be a band aid for everything. I feel so helpless reading this line.

 

This is nothing negative against your writing. What you've done is portray something that is incredibly effective. It's a lot to process at once, and it makes the reader feel something that maybe they were expecting or would consciously think about or feel. As a writer, you're challenging the readers, which is something I absolutely adore in a story.

 

I like how you have some contrast between Leo and Teddy's interaction and then Teddy and Andromeda's intereaction. You made me really tense with the café scene, because I wasn't sure if she was going to get some type of revenge on Teddy for having a good time with Leo, but I was relieved that it wasn't. SUre, having that suspicion isn't a good thing, especially with a caretaker involved, but I also like how you incorporate some good moments, because there are some good moments, even if Teddy is always walking on eggshells around her.

 

The ending was intense with Leo almost walking into oncoming traffic, Yikes!!!

 

What another great chapter. I'll be back soon for part five of our swap (and then our second swap, lol). :)



Author's Response:

Thank you so much, omg. It's in fact really hard to believe that there are people who like this story outside of myself! 

 

Hmmmm that line is really a favorite of mine, tbh. It perfectly summarizes what I often feel when it feels like my emotions are controlling me instead of the other way around. And yes! I want the reader to know these things instead of assuming them! I want them to know that this is how Teddy feels, and that there isn't any other correct interpretation of it! 

 

I'm glad you noticed the difference! In essence the purpose of both excursions (used loosely) are meant to give Teddy a fun time, but instead it really shows who Teddy is more comfortable around being. 

 

Thanks for reading! xx



Name: Chemical_Pixie (Signed) · Date: 25 Jun 2019 04:11 AM · [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Through Fishbowls

Here for part three of our swap! Thank you again for your patience!

 

This has been another brilliant chapter. I'm curious to know what you chose to put your timeframe in the author's notes at the end. Is it so that the reader can figure out the age and place of Teddy's life that this chapter takes place in? I do enjoy trying to figure these things out, since this information isn't spoonfed to me as a reader.

 

If Teddy's attitue towards running in the opening of the chapter isn't a mood, I don't know what is. I relate to his dread and exhaustion so much. Also, Teddy changing in the showers. I understand he's shy, but I hope that's it and that there's nothing else more sinister than that. What I really find interesting is that he's in Slytherin. I wonder if it really is due to Andromeda's domineering presence in his life. I like the snarky little Slytherin Teddy exhibits, though. I think that suits his personality so well. :)

 

I like the celestial theme of this chapter. From the opening with the clouds to Leo and Teddy's discussion on the universe to the discovery of the new planet at dinner. It is so apparent about the amount of thought that you have put into this story, and I am quite in awe of it. How do you find these almost unassuming themes that fit so seamlessly together?

 

Teddy's anxiety attack at the end is devastating. You can tell that he's uncomforatble from the get-go, and now I'm wondering how much Ginny and Harry actually see with Teddy's condition and what they're able to do about it. I'm glad that he's able to call his best friend, that's for sure. Leo seems to know how to talk to Teddy, how to get him feeling a functional normal, if only for a little while. Their friendship is amazing.

 

Even though it must be hard to write, I really feel like you do Teddy's mental health justice. I want him to receive that help that he deserves so badly, and I'm really intrigued to see where you take us next! I'll be back soon for the last two reviews of our swap! :)



Author's Response:

Yup, that's why I put the time frame! I've had a few readers tell about how vague the time of the setting was, and this seemed like the quickest remedy. 

 

I... hate running. So much. My middle school P.E. teacher loved giving us laps though, and I was always out of breath by the end of it. Unfortunately, it was also a class I had in the morning so I was tired for the rest of the day too.

 

Ooh! It's funny you mention that, because he does have some similarities of Andromeda's, but I think in Teddy's character they shine in a more positive light. I'm also glad to hear that you like Slytherin Teddy, that headcanon is my favorite! 

 

Okay, but your comment of the celestial theme had me laughing for days. That's nothing on you of course, but I didn't even realize that this chapter had a theme until you mentioned it! I suppose I did that unintentionally, lmao. 

 

Ah, yeah, the fact of his uncomfortable-ness from the beginning is part of what fueled the attack in the first place, the noise was just a catalyst. Teddy certainly has a friend in Leo, that's for sure. 

 

I'm super glad to hear that you think I do his health justice. I wonder a lot about if I'm even doing it right, and that... makes for a lot of setbacks in terms of writing this story. 

 

Thanks for reading! xx



Name: StarFeather (Signed) · Date: 24 Jun 2019 12:02 AM · starstarstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Nightmare

Hi! I stopped by from the forum review request. 

 

The way you started the story themed on Teddy is very original and unique. I feel it a bit or much of suspense. Gran is the relative of Bellatrix and Narcissa, I couldn't stop imagining each expression from your writing. I could catch the protagonist's care about her. At the same time, the mood is full of his anxiety, it indicates something bad might happen or really happened in the past?

 

In the middle, I wondered if Teddy dreamed their parents as Ginny and Harry, 'cause according to HP canon, Harry became his godfather and Tonks and Lupin died at the battle of Hogwarts. I imagined Ginny was busy with reporting about Quidditch articles and Harry was off his Auror's job and helped her to do the dishes. Then it turned out they were Tonks and Lupin! I hastily checked the tags under the banner and made sure it would contain AU, and it did make sense. 

 Wait, did Teddy kill his parents accidentally? I am afraid his werewolfness appeared and tragedy happened.  I hope not.  A cliff-hanger beginning!

 

K



Author's Response:

Hi! Yes, "Gran" is Andromeda, so you are correct! I'm glad you were able to catch onto the mood of the first scene! 

 

Ah, yup, in this AU, Teddy doesn't go to Harry and Ginny quite yet. He stays with Andromeda for quite a while. 

 

I'm a little surprised that you think that Teddy would have killed his parents! Now I'm just imagining a tiny four year old running around with a knife. But no, it was not Teddy who killed his parents! 

 

Thank you for reading and reviewing! xx



Name: justawillowtree (Signed) · Date: 23 Jun 2019 04:45 AM · [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Song and Dance

Hey, here again for your requested review!

 

There were so many sweet moments today, in this chapter. The scene where Leo and Teddy were making the hot chocolate together was just adorable. (Minus the darker parts, of course, like when Teddy holds the knife and has unpleasant subconscious recollections of that awful night.) I thought it was incredibly sweet of Leo to have baked a “housewarming gift” for Teddy; when we found out that it was really Leo who made that delightful treat, I just wanted to hug him. He is so sweet. Sets an excellent example for humankind.

 

Also, I love artistic children. They’re so creative and imaginative and fun to be around. Leo seems like exactly that kind of child.

 

I really enjoyed the moments with Teddy’s grandmother, actually. It made me a little nervous at first that she was suddenly being so joyous after consecutive chapters, and it continued to make me slightly nervous, but I was really glad that Teddy got to spend some quality time with his grandmother. I wonder if Andromeda has a bit of a mood disorder? It just seems so odd that she’d willingly leave the house for an extended period of time. But I was still really glad that Teddy had a pleasant time with his grandmother, at least.

 

I was so scared for Leo when he almost stepped right into traffic. He seems to get wrapped up in his ideas/talking sometimes, haha, which is cute sometimes but clearly fatal at other times. I also wonder about the relationship between him and his mom? You described her expression as “volatile” and she also calls him an idiot (I was unsure if this was said jokingly or not, but “volatile” made me think not), which are not things that mothers usually do/say towards their children. Maybe it’s entirely innocuous and I’m reading too much, but she seemed a little aggressive. If there’s nothing though, all the better!

 

I still have conflicting feelings about Andromeda. I do think that Teddy has a right to be upset with her; by the time I was seventeen (I know he’s not quite there yet but still), I was feeling stifled by my parents’ unwillingness to let me go out, and I stopped wanting friends to come over because they were never very welcoming haha. However, I don’t think strictness makes a parent bad. I don’t know. Andromeda’s negative tendencies to comment on Teddy’s weight is really bad but a lot of parents do that and they often don’t mean to be harsh or insensitive like that. Her biggest failing is not being open to Teddy, imo, which is bad but not enough for me to hate her.

 

Anyway, this is the last of my reviews! Thank you for requesting <3

 

Eva



Author's Response:

Hi Eva! 

 

I personally liked when they both cooked together! Cooking iwth friends is very fun! Leo is a very sweet kid. I just want to wrap him up in a blanket, really. 

 

I know! It's a bit unnerving right, that now she's getting her act together? I'd be a little suspicious too, but at this point, all Teddy wants is his Gran's affection, so. 

 

Leo and his mom are very close! I just mean that his mom gets annoyed a little too easy, but their relationship is very much a good one. 

 

I agree that strictness doesn't always make a parent bad, but it doesn't make the great either. I really think that it's very easy to cross over into being a helicopter parent and stifle your children's growth (well, mentally) if you're not careful about how you decide to raise your child. I definitely am a little bitter about the way my parents have treated me, but I've definitely have a lot more problems than I started with because of them. Also, yes, weight comments can often have good intentions! But if they're not communicated, it can very easily ruin a person's body image. It's alright if you don't hate her though. 

 

Thanks for reading and reviewing! xx



Name: justawillowtree (Signed) · Date: 23 Jun 2019 01:56 AM · [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Through Fishbowls

Hey! Here for your requested review. :)

 

How is Leo such a good friend?? What an angel. Personally I reject both of their sortings and wish to re-sort them into Hufflepuff, they are just too cute and precious and pure and fluffy (I’m kidding lol, I know you’re the author and have all the little secrets of their personalities stored in your head). But seriously, I think Leo is an amazingly considerate, perceptive, and thoughtful character. He shows this from the moment he runs with Teddy, who, like many people, hates running. (Did Leo run an extra few laps, since it seems like he was ahead of Teddy? If he did, that’s just extraordinary.) He shows this also when he asks Teddy about whether he was bothered by the other boys. And later he shows this when he talks with Teddy for a long, long time.

 

Anyway. Just wanted to point out real quick that I think the opening description of the clouds is a little self-contradictory. You say the clouds move “without a care in the world” but then also describe them as rough, threatening clouds, and these two ideas present two very different images. Also I think it’s cute how the Hogwarts Houses were transferred to this AU world haha. Going to a real life, non-magical school where you take a test and get sorted by your characteristics would be really interesting I think.

 

What is Teddy self-conscious of when he changes? Does he have lasting scars from the traumatizing events that occurred when he was younger? Or does he have body image issues, from maybe his gran’s disparaging comments about his weight and eating? (I take back what I said about Andromeda last chapter. I’d forgotten that she’d made mean comments about his eating, which is not good for any guardian to do.)

 

I really liked the scene at the Burrow. I thought that was very sweet. Especially the funny bit when his Aunt Audrey was explaining how his first word was the F-bomb hahaha. That’s so cute and so funny. What’s really hard for me to understand is, there is clearly a whole family of people here who love him and treasure him, so why don’t they see that he’s lonely like this? I feel really sorry for Teddy that the scraping sounds set off panic attacks, I wish I could help him in some way. <3

 

Good chapter!

 

Eva



Author's Response:

Honestly, Hufflepuff could work as well. While I personally chose Slytherin for Teddy because of his future characterization, I also completely believe that the quiz is probably very inaccurate. Perhaps Hufflepuff would suit him more, right now! Although, I think Leo is right where he belongs (even if I'm not the greatest fan of the Gryffindor house in general). Haha, I'm super glad you noticed. I didn't really put that in as it seemed like an extraneous detail, but Leo did run a few more laps for Teddy. 

 

I think you might the first one to point out the contradictory descriptions of the clouds there! I saw some people see it as symbolism for Teddy's state of mind (which they're not wrong), but to be honest I was just describing some pretty rad clouds that I saw a few days ago from when I wrote the chapter. I added in the houses because apparently it really is something that UK school system does, and I was like hey, why try to fix something that isn't broken? So I just added in the Hogwarts houses and changed up the sorting system, haha. 

 

Teddy's body image issues definitely stem from Andromeda's comments of his body and his eating habit, yeah. It comes up a tiny bit more in chapter seven, and it becomes a bigger issue in later chapters. Yup, Andromeda shouldn't be making those kinds of comments to her own grandson. I think there are better ways to get your child to have better eating habits, and the way she goes about it is Not It. 

 

The scene at the Burrow was fun to write! I loved adding in the tiny tidbit of Teddy's first word! It's a headcanon of mine that I love. I think his family does love him, but the only ones who he happens to be close to are the Potters. To everyone else, he just seems like a quiet kid who sometimes gets a little nervous. 

 

Thanks for reading and reviewing! xx



Name: justawillowtree (Signed) · Date: 22 Jun 2019 06:00 PM · [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Happier Times

Teddy is such a cute child. I want to just. steal him away and take care of him as a younger brother or something. Is Leo the first non-family friend that Teddy’s had? I imagine he doesn’t have many opportunities to befriend or hang out with other kids. That being said, does he even get to visit the Weasley family that often? He seems very, very lonely, which makes me feel really really sad for him.

 

Sigh I remember when I was ten and I never paid attention to instructions given in class. I would always rely on the person next to me to tell me what happened haha, so Teddy’s initial confusion is entirely understandable. Also, it was always the most stressful thing finding a partner; I would always be worried that my friends would pair together and I’d be the odd one out or something. You’re really making Teddy quite the relatable child here, aren’t you haha. But anyway I hope something good comes out of this friendship. I wonder if they’ll even become friends? Andromeda seems a little too strict to let Teddy hang out too much with other children.

 

Teddy being jealous of penguin friendships made my heart hurt a bit.

 

I love love love Leo! He’s really cute and I’m always a fan of little kids who love coming up with stories. (I bet Leo and Victoire would get along great haha. I wonder what kind of games those two would play.) Also, I entirely understand Teddy’s nervousness to ask his Gran to do things, like extend his time with Leo. I think being with strict guardians sort of does that to you, especially when you’re younger. My main worry is that Leo isn’t going to understand this. Like, I really hope that Leo doesn’t blame Teddy for his grandmother’s strictness, that would be so sad.

 

I was actually really surprised that Andromeda ended up taking Teddy to the park. It’s really odd that she didn’t give a response beforehand, yes, but given how strict Teddy makes her out to be, I was surprised that she agreed eventually at all. So as a result of that, I was surprised by Teddy’s ingratitude, haha. Like if I were Andromeda’s grandchild, I would’ve been really grateful that she granted me this one thing, you know?

 

You said that we were going to hate Andromeda later on, and maybe she’ll get worse as the story continues, but at the moment she just seems like a particularly strict guardian who still just wants the best for Teddy. Her reasoning for why they couldn’t stay longer made sense to me, about how he needs time to do his homework. Maybe she’s using that as an excuse for just not wanting Teddy to stay out, but I don’t know.

 

Anyway, we’ll see! Good job.

 

Eva



Author's Response:

I personally want Teddy as an younger brother too; he's so adorable but also very lonely. You're right in that Leo happens to be the first non-family friend. Teddy is pretty lonely, so I think he latched onto Leo, pretty much. Leo was more than willing, so that was good!

 

Oof! I really hate partner projects! I totally understand that feeling when you think your friends might leave to pair up with each other! I never quite know what to do in those situations because my social skills are very lacking, haha. 

 

Strict to describe Andromeda seems to be popular! And I agree! 

 

Having strict parents does tend to make you nervous about asking for things, and also sometimes stunt relationships. My parents are the same way, and I'm really so lucky that my friends understand that. I think Leo manages to be pretty understanding, though. 

 

I think that Teddy is more angry about the fact that his Gran didn't give him an answer. Regardless of whether his Gran said yes or no, those are still answers, yes? Andromeda's reasoning for not letting her stay also makes sense, but isn't just a teeny bit odd that she's not letting him stay because they Leo and Teddy are technically working on an assignment? 

 

I think you'll start to see the behavior I'm referring to in later chapters, but it most explicitly appears in chapter seven. I hope you'll stick around to read it? 

 

Thanks for reading and reviewing! xx



Name: justawillowtree (Signed) · Date: 20 Jun 2019 06:13 PM · [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Play Pretend

Hey! Here to review your second chapter!

 

Okay, so he’s around eight or nine in this chapter, right? I thought you did such a marvelous job capturing the imagination and playfulness of children. I have a younger sister who is still pretty much a child (I’m sure you know about her already haha), and so reading about little kids just makes me smile fondly because it reminds me of her. But I’m getting ahead of myself! I should go through this chapter more chronologically haha.

 

From the very beginning, I thought all of Teddy’s interactions with the people around him were so cute. The way he just runs into Ginny’s hug is so, so adorable! And Ginny’s gentle teasing (and tickling) really shows how much she loves Teddy. (Though I’m pretty sure when I was a child, I would burst into tears immediately when people tickled me. I, unfortunately, hated tickling. Still do, actually, yikes. But anyway, good on Teddy for being a good sport about it!)

 

Though I’m not sure what the context of this visit is, I like the implication that he gets to come over a lot! He immediately asks for Molly and Victoire (which was so sweet, by the way, I love it when boys and girls play together civilly without breaking out into fights or tears), which makes it seem as though he’s been here a bunch with them before. I wonder if Ginny and Harry babysit their relatives’/friends’ children regularly? It doesn’t seem like Percy/Audrey or Fleur/Bill are around, so I’m just assuming they’re the assigned caretakers for the moment. If so, that’s just amazingly sweet of them. Your Ginny is clearly wonderful with kids, and I love her already!

 

Also, Victoire is learning Korean?? That’s so amazing??? Where is she learning it from? Who in her family knows Korean? I love the multilingualness of this child already haha.

 

The Pokemon game was absolutely adorable. I think we all had a friend like Victoire who was so good at setting up the imaginary play scenarios, and would direct everyone to their positions, and we would just follow along because she had good/smart ideas haha. (Unless you were the Victoire of your friend group, which I definitely wasn’t lmao.) I gotta be honest, I know nothing about Pokemon, and basically all my very limited knowledge comes from watching that recent Detective Pikachu movie, and the only Pokemon I know is Pikachu. So I was excited when Teddy was gonna pick Pikachu but then Victoire said it wasn’t going to work game-wise haha. But Victoire is so cute omg, and Teddy’s very flat acting when playing with her was a good and funny contrast.

 

I noticed that Teddy seems to be sensitive to injuries. Not only his own, which is clearer, but also other people’s. Like, when Victoire slid on the ground on her knees, he was worrying about the scratches she would get. At first, I wondered if it was just a general thoughtfulness towards other people, but then I suspected that it was partially due to his trauma from being a toddler. I wonder if either of my theories are right, haha. But I felt so sad for him when he scraped his ankle/knees/hands. Like I could see that he didn’t want to cry, and felt embarrassed by how easily he did start crying, which is really relatable—even if the reason for his strong reaction to pain is something that I can’t relate to so much.

 

I can’t be sure that I’m understanding Ginny’s reaction totally right, but it seems that she has a sort of soft spot for Teddy? Like her face softens when she sees him, as opposed to the grumpier look she has when Victoire calls her. But it also does seem like this sort of thing happens a decent amount, because of the way she sighs when he can’t walk. I’m not sure, but it’s interesting. Also I wonder what causes Teddy’s strong reaction to the scraping sound on the counter? I’m assuming it’s something that happened during the murder of his parents but I’m not sure; I’m curious about it though!

 

When Teddy called Harry “Dad,” it broke my heart a little, especially when Andromeda scolded him for it. I can really understand Andromeda’s hardened disposition, since everyone in her immediate family died or was killed, and it makes me feel for her. But I think it would be nice for Teddy to have parental figures, and I’m sure that his parents would want him to feel loved in a happy family. I wonder how his relationship with Andromeda will continue. <3

 

Really interesting chapter!

 

Eva



Author's Response:

Hello Eva!

 

Thank you! I based this scene off of my own memories, but I also have some great experience with children so I have been observing their behavior for a while now! I personally love little kids because of the strange ass conversations you can have with them. They’re very entertaining.

 

I’m glad you think the interactions were cute! That’s exactly what I was going for! I think at this point, Teddy is pretty fond of Ginny. And I totally understand your struggles when people tickle you! I was the kid with asthma so if someone tickled me too much, I’d go into a coughing fit. They were not fun. But alas, no matter what you answer to the question ‘are you ticklish?’ you’re pretty much going to get tickled.

 

I do believe that he was there to their houses a lot before! But the visits slowly wane as he grows older. I didn’t really think about whether Harry and Ginny look after the children a lot, but considering the fact that I imagine them both to be people that work from home, it’s completely possible!

 

Ah, that bit! It was something I couldn’t help but put in because I personally just loved the head canon so much. For a while now I imagined Fleur to be fully Korean while her children would be half Korean. Then as for learning Korean, I just think that she wouldn’t really pass up the chance to teach her kids Korean and French, you know?

 

I definitely was not the Victoire of the group either! I based her off of a friend of mine, and she was the one who always came up with the ideas. I pitched some, but for the most part, I was an actor. You know! Nothing! About Pokémon? For shame. Pokemon was pretty much my childhood, so even if I drift away from it, it always has a place in my heart.

 

I never really thought about that either! I think Teddy is just generally sympathetic to other people’s pain, and I never meant to be as a reaction to his trauma. It’s certainly possible though. Now, the extreme reaction to the scraping sound is definitely sourced from his trauma, yes.

 

I’m really surprised by the fact that you sympathize for Andromeda! It’s just most of the other reactions I had gotten from other people was that she was being a little harsh on Teddy, but yes! She had been through a lot, and she deserves some sympathy for that. I’m not really sure about what you’ll think about Andromeda and Teddy’s relationship in the coming chapters, but I’m really interested to know!

 

Thank you for reading and reviewing! It was lovely seeing you here. xx



Name: justawillowtree (Signed) · Date: 20 Jun 2019 03:29 PM · [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Nightmare

Hey! Here for your requested review :)

 

You’ve set this story up really interestingly! This is an AU of some sort, though to what degree, I’m not sure. Teddy must be around four in this story, assuming his birth year is the same as in the novels? So the timeline has shifted a little bit, which makes sense considering he remembers this terrifying experience really well. This is such an awful thing for a small child to go through, and I think you described it well.

 

At first I wondered whether the overwhelming silence after the initial scene of pain and worry meant that he had gone deaf due to trauma, but then he could hear afterwards, so I was wrong haha. I thought the use of silence to express a sense of eeriness was still successfully done, though.

 

I’m curious to see what you mean by your author’s note, that this is a story of recovery. I’m curious about Teddy’s path to recovery!

 

Interesting first chapter :)

 

Eva



Author's Response:

Eva! It's nice to see you back! :^)

 

It is an AU, yes! In some aspects, it sticks pretty closely to canon, but I take some liberties with Andromeda and some of the secondary characters! 

 

Thank you! I'm not a big fan of silence in the first place, which is why I used it as an indicator that something is severely wrong. 

 

Ah, the recovery part. We're getting there. 

 

Thanks for reading and reviewing! xx



Name: VaguelyCreativeName (Signed) · Date: 17 Jun 2019 09:56 AM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Creatures of the Dark

Hey sunshine, I’m here with the review you requested!

 

OH GOD NO, POOR LEO!

 

I thought something must be the matter when Leo was late, because it’s not like him to stand Teddy up without good reason, but this is just heart-breaking, especially with the near miss from last chapter… And of course, Teddy finds a way to blame himself for Leo’s death, I just can’t put into words how deeply sad that is.

The chapter already felt bitter-sweet to me in the beginning because, while the idea of them going out for Teddy’s birthday was very sweet, the fact that Teddy doesn’t think his birthday was worth the fuss put a damper on that, and his interactions with the Potters seem to make Teddy so uncomfortable, or otherwise he’d surely stop by more often than once a year. I feel bad for Ginny, too, she obviously loves Teddy and means well, but she seems to be in the habit of rather putting her foot in her mouth; with the way she reacted to Teddy’s panic attack in an earlier chapter, and now her comment about having to stop by Teddy’s house. It was clearly said in jest, and she couldn’t know how that must feel threatening to Teddy, but people stopping by his house gives him so much anxiety… It’s also sad to see how deeply uncomfortable Teddy is with physical contact from cuddling with Al to Ginny hugging him after they watch the news – it seems like physical touch and comfort are very important in the Potter household, but that’s not something Teddy’s really comfortable with, so that probably adds to why he’s so nervous about visiting.

 

Of course, Ginny and Harry wouldn’t recognise Leo, so they don’t even know why Teddy’s devastated, and he’s too distraught to tell anyone, so he isolates himself. With Leo gone, Teddy doesn’t have much of a support network anymore, and that shows immediately.

 

The way you’ve written Teddy’s nightmare is so good, too! I like how you incorporated those subtle hints about something not quite being right so that the reader realises Teddy is dreaming along with him. And the details Teddy’s mind supplied about what his family could have been like are so heart-breaking, like the fact that his Mum notices immediately that he’s scared and reaches out for Teddy. The scenario with the birds, and then with his father bleeding to death is absolutely hellish, but so well done. Teddy acutely blames himself for Leo’s death, and perhaps subconsciously he does blame himself for his parents’ death as well, so I think it’s very plausible hearing about Leo would trigger something like that, to the point where all Teddy feels is guilt.

 

This was such a terrible thing to happen for Teddy, but so well written, and I’m scared to think what will happen to Teddy now after the loss of his best friend.

            Much Love,

            Julia



Name: Noelle Zingarella (Signed) · Date: 15 Jun 2019 10:42 PM · [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Happier Times

Hi Sunshine! I’m back for chapter 3 (and I’m also here for June 2019 RvG, team Red).

 

I’m curious as to where Teddy is going to school and what grade he is in. I see that he’s being assigned a group project (I never really liked those, probably because I can be kind of awkward) but it seems as though Leo is a nice boy. I’m sorry that they have to find time outside of class to work on it—it seems as though this might be a problem for Teddy.

 

I love the way you build the anxiety in the second scene. The sentences all separated by so much space make me think of Teddy pacing, trying to work up the courage to talk to his Grandmother. Why is his grandmother so scary? Why wouldn’t she want him to work on his school project? I’m glad to relax as the reader with Teddy as he watches his nature program. Penguins are adorable and the way they work together to survive is amazing. I’m sorry to see that Teddy is so lonely that he wishes he were one of these animals.

 

This dinner is so tense—I guess you’re showing us some of why Teddy is lonely. I’m sorry to see his Grandmother being so cold and critical to him. I wonder why she won’t just tell him that he can do his project? How is he supposed to get a good grade? 

 

You’ve given me so many questions here—why is Gran spending all her time in her room? I would guess that her treatment of Teddy is why he’s so shy and unwilling to put himself out. He’s probably be punished so many times that he doesn’t want to risk it. 

 

Your description of his heart-rate and temperature fluctuations at dinner was wonderful, by the way.

 

I’m so glad that Gran decides to take him to the park. But maybe she had always meant to and is just not good at communicating with a child? Or maybe she’s just a really bad Grandmother. I guess we’ll find out as the story goes on.

 

This scene between Leo and Teddy is wonderful. I love that Leo has all these ideas, but that he needs Teddy to help flesh them out. Actually, it reminded me of writing fanfiction—Leo has the framework of the story, but Teddy can add his own ideas and he feels proud of them even if he didn’t make the whole thing up from scratch. I love the story that they’re working on, by the way. I hope that you write it out at some time—what a great fairy tale it would make!

 

Hmmm, I hope that they are able to finish their project…

 

Thank you for requesting, and come back any time. I have so many questions—I definitely want to know what happens next! Nice work!

 

Yours,

 

Noelle




Name: Chemical_Pixie (Signed) · Date: 15 Jun 2019 03:07 AM · [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Happier Times

Here for our swap!!! 

 

AHHH! This opening scene is everything! It is so relatable with zoning out and then needing to find a partner. That was always the worst! I love how you write Teddy here, uncertain yet confident enough to make the first move, and then how he gains more confidence as the exchange goes on. Leo and Teddy's chemsitry is awesome, and I love how you have Teddy connect Leo's name to what he knows--that's such a human thing to do, and it ties the reader further into your AU.

 

That next scene with Teddy's anxiety over asking his grandmother about meeting a classmate in the park to do a project is so well done. I  can relate to Teddy so well here, and the way you build suspense and then have Andromeda's curt replies really paints the scene spectacularly. I have struggled with anxiety in my adulthood, but as a child, I definitely remember times that I felt similarly to Teddy.  It's also interesting to note that one of his coping mechanisms is to watching the video of his parents' wedding--another layer of wonderful detail and complexity to your AU. It makes me curious to see what happens next!

 

That Saturday... Teddy's actions are completley controlled by his fear of his Gran. That is so heartbreaking to read, of a child so young going through that. It makes me wonder how Andromeda got this way and why she things it is okay to treat another human being--who is way more vulenerable than she is--in this way. Does she someone blame Teddy for the death of Remus and Dora? 

 

Anyway, Teddy is such a sweet boy, and I love how he and Leo spent their afternoon working so diligently on their project together, and what an imaginative story! I'm glad you had a nod to character and world building in this chapter.

 

I'll be back soon. This story is so good! :)



Author's Response:

Omg, the zoning out during class is something I myself do a lot. I have to say, while it's fun, it does have a lot of drawbacks. 

 

Oh god, the anxiety is something I relate to a lot. I've gotten a little bit better with it over time, but the anxiety still flares whenever the person I'm talking to seems angry, disappointed, or displeased with me. To cope, I used to do something similar to what Teddy did, but not quite.

 

Yeah, Teddy doesn't know how to act without that fear of his Gran in the back of his mind. It's almost so unnoticeable even to yourself that you start thinking it's just who you are at that point. 

 

I couldn't not nod towards my own hobby with these two, lol. It was my chance! 

 

Thanks for reading! xx



Name: Chemical_Pixie (Signed) · Date: 13 Jun 2019 02:56 AM · [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Play Pretend

Hey! Here for our extended swap (and the story of course).

 

I love how the mood shifts in this chapter. From tickles and playing with cousins (I consider Victoire and Molly his cousins), Teddy is all set for a good visit. I love how you had them play pretend. This scene took me right back to my childhoos, where I would spend hours playing make believe. Pokémon is such a nice touch, since I feel like it was still popular in 2007. 

 

I adore Victoire. Her adventurous spirit, her fire, her determination. I can see why Teddy is drawn to her, and I'm so curious to see how you will have their relationship develop over the years.

 

But all doesn't remain light hearted and fluffy, does it? Teddy falling down pained me--similar things happened to me when I was a kid, and I know how tough it is to bounce back from startling injuries that hurt. The playing pretend scene and this scene were Ginny takes care of Teddy makes me wonder if you have experience working with kids--it's so realistic!

 

As Teddy was resting, I was curious about his anxiety: the scrape on the counter, and then him calling Harry "Dad." It was a mindless slip of the tongue, probably similar to calling a teacher after a parent. But for someone like Teddy, who lost his parents, I can see how much weight that brings on him. Unfortunately, I can relate to him here, that aching for his parents but then that dread of what people will think if they find out...

 

which brings me to Andromeda. She's one of my favorite minor canon characters, but in this fic, as you indicated in your author's note, she isn't going to be a very likable character. I'm intrigued to see your interpretation of her. Maybe she's bringing out more of her upbrining in her older age? Maybe she's still enacting on her grief? It's hard to say right then, but I really feel for Teddy at the end of the chapter.

 

Despite his home life, and losin his parents, and getting hurt, Teddy is a resilient little boy, and I cannot wait to see him grow.

 

I'll be back (probably tomorrow) for the next chapter. So excited! :)



Author's Response:

Finally decided to answer your reviews because honestly I feel like I needed to provide some answers. So here I am. 

 

I'm glad to hear that the scene reminded you of your own childhood! It came pretty much from my own, haha! 

 

I think Victoire is such a spitfire, but I'm sad to say she doesn't come around for a while. 

 

Ah, that scene. Yes, I do have some experience with kids! Talking to them to figure out what they think about is so helpful for writing. 

 

Oof, I feel really bad for making you hate Andromeda now. I think she's a great character in the series, but I like to think in this story she never learned about how wrongly her parents raised her. 

 

Thanks for reading and reviewing! xx



Name: Noelle Zingarella (Signed) · Date: 28 May 2019 03:54 PM · [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Play Pretend

Hi Sunshine! I’m here from your forum request.

 

After that shocker of a first chapter, this second one is a complete change of pace. Teddy is in this safe, loving atmosphere with his aunt and his cousins. I thought your characterization of Ginny was adorable and it was nice to see Teddy basking in affection from an adult—especially since he lost his parents so violently at the beginning of the story.

 

I thought your portrayal of the kids was sweet and pretty accurate. I liked how Victoire was the boss and orchestrating the game of playing Pokemon. It was also really amusing to think about these kids all playing Pokemon. This whole scene of them outside, near the woods, was really idyllic and Teddy seems like a go-with-the-flow sort of a kid. He’s willing to play the girls’ game, even if he lets his mind wander during it. I wonder what he would have chosen to play if he’d been the one to choose.

 

The fun continues until, of course, someone gets hurt. Poor Teddy! I hope that his ankle isn’t broken (that’s the mom in me—going straight to the worst case scenario). I love that the kids handle the crisis well though—Victoire runs to get Ginny and Molly stays with Teddy. It’s sad that Teddy feels like he’s being trouble, though, it was an accident after all.

 

I have to say, that with how kindly Harry and Ginny take care of Teddy it’s totally understandable that he would call Harry ‘Dad’ reflexively. I’m very troubled by his Gran’s reaction to that slip. He’s just a little boy! I wonder what other difficulties Teddy has in his relationship with his grandmother…

 

Nice chapter! Thanks for coming by my thread and come back any time. :-)

 

Yours,

Noelle



Name: ReillyJade (Signed) · Date: 26 May 2019 04:01 AM · [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Song and Dance

Hi, Sunshine. I'm here with your requested review.

 

I think the saddest thing about this story is how Teddy internalizes everything. Nothing that has happened to him so far - losing his parents, being forced to live with his emotionally abusive grandmother - is his fault, yet he seems to feel guilty for a lot of it. Maybe it's just me interpreting things wrong, but it seems like, in some bizarre way, Teddy feels bad that his grandmother got "stuck" with him. When he wants to ask for things, or even when he thinks about enthusiasm Molly and Audrey share for astronomy, there seems to be a subtle, subconscious feeling that he doesn't deserve that kind of happiness. It's heartbreaking to read, but it illustrates the effects of his abuse.

 

I thought it was lovely that Leo didn't judge Teddy based on the Black family history. Even the kindest, most well-intentioned people can do that sometimes, but Leo truly doesn't seem to think less of Teddy for his blood connection to something he played no part in. Also, Teddy's willingness to share his family's history with Leo just showcases how strong and trusting their friendship is. The way you tailored the Blacks' canonical motivations/prejudices to the Muggle world was very well done. Even though this is Muggle AU, I'm glad you're grounding it in canonical elements.

 

I get the sense that Andromeda is succumbing to age and her mind is slipping a bit. Forgetting Leo is definitely weird, especially considering how on-top of Teddy's life she was in earlier chapters. Also, she almost seems... kind in this chapter. That obviously doesn't make up for what she's done, of course - one day of kindness doesn't erase years of abuse - but is it possible she's reflecting on her treatment of Teddy and trying to make amends in some way? Or, is she just forgetting how much of an "inconvenience" her grandson has been to her? I just get the feeling that she's unwell in some way, whether she's aware of it or not, and that's beginning to manifest in interesting ways.

 

Cheers,

Reilly



Name: belgian quaffle (Signed) · Date: 25 May 2019 03:34 PM · [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Song and Dance

Hi!! Here for our swap again!

 

Ughhh Teddy always makes me so sad when he's around Andromeda. I hate how he's so nervous about asking her for something so simple as inviting a friend over. I love how you describe this scene and build it up. "Maybe for Leo homes were special to him" is so sad! And how he feels like a house is just a structure, it really packs the punch how these lines are left in here, almost like carelessly, because Teddy totally doesn't know better. You do a great job of using words and spacing/structure to build up Teddy's anxiety in this!

 

Ohhhh Leo totally knows Teddy's gran isn't treating him well! He asked about it and like on one hand I get not wanting to push because it's definitely a touchy subject (and they're so young!!) but ohhh he should have pushed a bit more!  LEOOOO!!!

 

This was a...shockingly nice day out with Teddy and his Gran! She definitely had her moments (not remembering Leo was...ugh come on), but she was fairly friendly and decently nice! She handled the "are you adopted" moment kind of better than I thought she would have? Crazy moment with Leo at the end there and obviously I'm glad his mom was there to protect him! I can't help but compare Leo and his mom to Teddy and Andromeda in this scene and the comparison makes me sad again! Another lovely chapter!

-Sarah



Name: Lacey Black (Signed) · Date: 25 May 2019 02:04 PM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:Glass Chapter: Nightmare

Hey you!

im here for our swap! 

Wow what a way to start a story! I’m really intrigued by this, how you kept them alive long enough for Teddy to remember their murder. I truly love it when an author likes to torment their characters with such things. It makes for such great angst and plot line. 

I like the way you describe Teddy’s inner turmoil and his confusion. How he felt about running down the hall how it seemed to stretch forever but came to an end so quickly at the same time. You are really talented in your depiction of the events playing out before him. And your narrative voice for his character is  very well done.

I am left curious about who murdered his parents! I want to know what is going on in the beginning.

great job!  Might have to swap with you again and continue this! 

xo 

LB



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