Reviews For After Destiny

Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 09 Dec 2018 01:42 AM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Insecurities

Hey Dan!


I'm back for one final Gryffindor Red vs. Gold Review battle for December 2018 review!


Ginny is pissed again, but this time rightfully so. Ron and Hermione must've had her terrified not knowing if Harry was okay or not. And then to be stuck there for an hour waiting, not knowing what was going on. It must've been awful for her.


I thought the Auror thing was going to be a huge source of tension for her, but I was surprised that she was actually considerate about it. I like that she realizes she can't force Harry to choose her over a job without there being some resentment. It is a surprisingly mature decision for her to take time to think on the Auror bit.


Poor Ron is uncomfortable on the plane. Middle seats are a curse worse than extended torture. Poor baby had no idea what he was getting into when he tried to get Hermione to take the window seat. Sweet innocent soul. I do think it's a bit sad that he thinks for Hermione to love him that he can't do anything that makes him who he is. I know he cares about her and wants to support her, but pretending to be something he's not is excessive and only setting himself up for failure.


Aww. This last bit about Luna and Neville was depressing. It seems like Luna is usually immune to being down, but I suppose her dads tenuous condition and the ruins of her home are even too much for her. Neville is so sweet wanting to make it all better. I loved the little bit where she pulled away and told him he was repeating himself, but that it felt good.


My heart breaks a bit to think of them leaving Luna's home to head to the Burrow only to find the Burrow in ruins as well. I hope that maybe they send a message to Harry and end up at Grimmuald Place. It's the perfect spot for them for now.


Well, I'm sad to say that this is the last chapter you have posted so far, so you know what that means? You need to write more, preferably sooner than later. I'd really like to know what happens next. K, thanks. Bye for now!



Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 09 Dec 2018 12:33 AM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Short Goodbyes

Hey Dan!


I'm back for another Gryffindor Red vs. Gold Review Battle for December 2018.


I think it's sad that Ron is telling his mum goodbye and she can't even hear him. I suppose it's the thought that counts though. And to be honest, I think it's for the best. I think Molly would go spare if she knew Ron and Hermione were going to take off on their own. She still thinks of them as children (and she isn't necessarily wrong) even though they've all been through hell and back.


Harry is so frustratingly stubborn. If he hadn't wasted all that time arguing with Proudfoot, they'd have been safely at Grimmuald Place and would've probably avoided the showdown at St. Mungo's. He's so proud and he doesn't want to have handlers, but sometimes he needs to realize there are reasons that people have been set in place to protect him.


That being said, the way Harry sussed out the imposter minister was very clever. He picked up right away that Proudfoot and the hit wizards were on edge. The way he calmly asked after Doge and reversed Doge's position was smart. Of course, real Kingsley would've corrected him, but the imposter wouldn't have known any better.


The battle was pretty vicious. It's a shame that Proudfoot got tortured and injured, but I'm glad everyone survived. Well...except for the false Hit Wizard, but who cares about him really?


Harry is so cute telling Ron and Hermione to get going. He's right though. If they don't leave immediately they'll never be allowed to go. I thought it was sweet that Ron wanted to give Harry a man hug. I'm sure it's super weird for them to be apart after all the time they've spent together. They truly are a bromance.


I liked Kingsley's rational about Harry's safety quite a bit. Problems definitely seem to follow him, so having more experience with dueling and safety measures would certainly be beneficial. It was pretty funny that Proudfoot was so put off by the whole thing.  I suppose she doesn't want the extra hassle to deal with.


Oh dear. I do not like Augusta one bit at all in this chapter. Luna may be Xenophelius' daughter, but she is nothing like him...and even if she was, that's no way for Augusta to behave. I get that Luna is a bit strange and that Neville behaves different around her, but Augusta was way out of line to talk about her the way she did. I don't get it. This seems very out of character for her.


 I feel like Robards will inevitable come around to his senses.


Another good chapter! So much happened in this one. On to the last one now I believe.



Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 08 Dec 2018 10:07 PM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Small Accomplishments

Hey Dan!


I'm back for another Gryffindor Red vs. Gold Review Battle for December 2018.


And here goes the sad stuff again. I'm glad that George came out and talked to Bill even if it was only a little bit. It's small, but it's progress. I just wish George didn't feel like he was such a burden. He isn't. All of the Weasley's would do anything to help him through his grieving. And like Bill said, he'd have done the same for any of them. I suppose if anyone's going to suffer from survivor's guilt though, it would be one twin who survived when the other one died.


I had a good giggle over Bill's comments about Fleur's cousin and her packaging methods. At least it got a slight reaction from George. It was a nice effort on Bill's part.


I'm glad that Harry is talking to Fleamont and Euphemia. He needs all the guidance, love, and support he can get. They might be portraits, but it's the closest thing he's ever had to biological family.


You know, Ginny really has an issue with hitting people. This is what the third time she's slapped Harry? She's also slapped Bill. I get that she's angry and upset, but it's really not okay to just hit people. Eventually Harry is going to tire of it.


That being said, she really has a point when she's going off about Dumbledore. I mean he expected three underqualified underage wizards to manage to just fumble through stuff that most adults couldn't even comprehend. But sometimes I do wonder if that was part of it. Like did Dumbledore pick children because they have more flexible imaginations? Perhaps, if he'd sent Kingsley or Minerva or really any other adult, their minds would've been to rigid and set to think outside of the box. Am I grasping at straws here?


You know, I'm convinced that Ginny is overblowing what her father and brothers might say about her staying at Grimmuald Place. I mean, she's been there for a fair bit already and I don't think it's exactly any secret that she's dating Harry. I don't think it would necessarily be the ideal situation for any of them, but I think everyone has more pressing concerns at the moment.


I know Harry feels a bit off about Proudfoot, but I actually like her. She's to the point and quite insightful.


I'm dying over the way Wilkie Twycross dressed Hermione down. Ha. He called her an overachiever. The fact that Harry, Ron, and even Proudfoot were stifling laughter was something I've been dying to read. I love Hermione. I love that she's so smart and detail oriented, but she can also be way too focused on the rules and overachieving. Maybe this will remind her to take it easy once in a while.


This is very intriguing that Harry was left an amended will. I wonder what it contains. I swear if there's anything in there that's to set him off on another adventure to kill some evil wizard, I will raise Dumbledore from the dead and kill him myself. Really what should be in there is some plane tickets to a tropical island and a good bottle of firewhiskey. Dumbledore owes him that much.


I'm glad that Ron finally told Mr. Weasley that he's going to Australia with Hermione. I was worried he might just up and disappear without telling anyone. I imagine that would really set everyone to working if one day he just wasn't there anymore. It looks like talking to Mr. Weasley was largely beneficial too as he had some very solid advice about avoiding detection. I swear Arthur doesn't get enough credit sometimes.


Aww. Ron can be a prat sometimes, but this isn't one of him. He's right that something is wrong with Ginny, but he's also right that tearing her away from Harry would only exacerbate the situation. She really does need some help though.


Of course, Ron and Hermione can't just go on their way. Something has to happen to stop them. Why are the fates so cruel Dan? Why can't things just go their way for once? Why must you pick on these poor babies?


Off to the next chapter now!



Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 08 Dec 2018 07:08 PM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: A Little Convincing

Hey Dan!


I'm back for another Gryffindor Red vs. Gold Review Battle for December 2018.


Kingsley is a very astute observer. He certainly learned strategy from Dumbledore, whether directly or indirectly. You can see him playing with his chess pieces in the way he instructs Harry to speak with Doge.


Poor Doge. He just wants some peace and quiet. Now, Harry is going to somehow convince him out of retirement. I really like how Harry convinced him in this case. It wasn't even so much convincing as it was just having a conversation. Once he got him all riled up about politics, I knew he would eventually join them. I love that Harry used it as a moment to bring Kingsley into the fray. It was deftly done.


I enjoyed Harry telling his story to Hermione, Ron, and Ginny. It sounds pretty positive if Doge and Kingsley were writing lists when he left. Figures Ron would be reading a Quidditch magazine instead of actively listening.


I know Harry and Ginny are in the throws of lust and first love, but it is a little obnoxious to be constantly climbing all over each other. I wonder when the hormones will settle down.


I'm glad that Hermione is starting to feel more comfortable with Ron. I am also glad she's discovering her sense of power over him. I think the idea that she's in control will definitely make things a lot easier for her to deal with.


Poor Ron is so excited when he recalls Seamus' story about the actor. He excitedly blurts it out and then quickly realizes he's stuck his foot in his mouth. Typical Ron.


I thought the ending where he's telling her that he's really trying hard was very sweet. That is one thing that you can never take away from him. He might mess up, but he always redeems himself.


Another very enjoyable chapter. Again, I'm glad for a couple of light chapters, although I'm sure there's still a lot of darkness to come.



Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 08 Dec 2018 06:35 PM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Responsibilities and Appearances

Hey Dan!


I'm back for another Gryffindor Red vs. Gold Review Battle for December 2018.


Well, the positive is that Molly is on the mend. If she's allowed to have visitors, it means she's slowly improving. The bad is that she's so loaded on spells and potions that she barely knows what's going on. I did love that even in her drug induced stupor, she had the sense to tell Ron that it was about time he and Hermione got together. I had a good giggle at that.


I can definitely understand why Ron wants to get the hell out. I know when I was going through my grandma passing away she had horrible dementia from Parkinson's disease...and it was honestly incredibly difficult to be around. I loved her, so I stayed, but it was a constant battle against my instincts to leave. It's a very guilt inducing feeling too.


I did not expect this much boxers vs. briefs convo to happen in this story. Who knew that there was such a fierce debate.


Hermione and Ron shopping for clothes were hilarious. I love how Ron picked out super racy underwear for Hermione. It's funny how modest she still is about him seeing underwear. Good call on his part though to flatter her and tell her how nice he thinks she'd look in them. I almost died when he held up the leopard print ones. That's probably pushing it a bit too much for her.


Oh, Kingsley. I know he wasn't looking forward to having to bring Harry into the fray, but I think he's right. Doge needs to be found. Hopefully, Kingsley can just very slowly start to work Harry into things. Ginny is right, he deserves his peace. Harry is also right though. Kingsley is a good guy, the sort they fought to have in charge, so he should support him as much as he can. If the ministry fails, Kingsley be replaced by another Fudge or Scrimgeour, so it's in everyone's best interest if Harry helps.


Nice chapter with a much lighter tone. After the last few chapters, it was very necessary.



Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 08 Dec 2018 05:03 PM · starstarstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Damage Control

Hey Dan!


I'm back for another Gryffindor Red vs. Gold Review Battle for December 2018.


I definitely was worried about the next chapter for the right reasons. I remember looking this chapter over for you when you were first writing it, or at least the part about Ginny. I have basically the same feelings reading it now as I did the first time. I think it can be really hard to write about rape in a sensitive way. I think the PTSD, flashbacks, all of that makes sense. I think the feeling of dirtiness and the scalding bathwater makes sense. I'm just not so sure about the power trip on Harry. Ultimately though, you have to stick to your guns on that.


I do have to say I didn't really feel like this plotline was necessary for Ginny. She's already been tortured, humiliated, lost a family member and friends, been possessed and forced to do horrible things, lived in almost constant fear for the last year, and has just watched her mum totally lose the plot. To me it's like what can possibly be worse? Oh yeah, let's add a rape. And a gang rape to boot. I know that isn't the way that you wrote this and that you put a lot of thought and care into a sensitive portrayal, but for me, I just don't know that Ginny needed that in her story arc. Hopefully, I articulated that in a way that is understandable.


Kingsley certainly has his plate full. Being the minister post-war certainly isn't an easy task. I loved his thoughts about all of the wizengamot members. It's awful that they just constantly hide behind more capable wizards. What business do they have in a wizengamot seat if they are unprepared to do anything? I also liked Kingsley's instincts regarding Harry. Anyone else would absolutely try to use him in whatever way they could. He really does have to protect him. I like his idea of using Harry in the Aurors department though. I think that could be very effective.


Oh Hermione. She really is so awkward with all of this sex stuff. Part of me just wishes she'd get it over with so she could be less awkward, but really, I'd rather she wait until she's ready. It's an important experience, one that I want to be good for her. I'm beginning to think she's right about Ginny moving too quickly though. I think Ginny is using sex as a coping mechanism for not dealing with her own issues now.


This was another really difficult chapter to read, but it was also very well written. Good job.



Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 08 Dec 2018 04:16 PM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Long Stories

Oh Dan, Why are you doing this to me? As if the last chapter wasn't depressing enough. This is just...ugh. I don't have any words.


I know that Bill is under a tremendous amount of strain and he's trying to hold it all together for everyone, but damn did he say the wrong thing. I can understand why Ginny slapped him. He's acting like she doesn't know first hand what the war was like. She was tortured, violated, and living in constant fear. Now she's in a house full of damaged people who are all barely holding it together. She's watching her family fall apart. She knows how messed up everything is and it was so incredibly unfair of him to talk to her that way. Had I been in her shoes, I would've slapped him too.


And then there's poor Harry. Stuck in the middle of all this and not sure what to do. Then there's that convo that Bill and Charlie want to have with him as if he is somehow a child. I know it's all good intentions and wanting to keep everyone safe, but it's just not the right time and not the right thing to say.


Kudos to Kreacher for noticing how badly Harry wanted to get away from it all. Sometimes it seems like Kreacher is the only one looking out for his best interest.


I'm glad that Harry finally had a chat with Fleamont and Euphemia. I think he desperately needs some family advice right now. His grandmother seems to have a good nurturing nature. I think their words also helped him clarify his role in Teddy's life.


I'm glad Hermione went to Ron. It seems like he really needs her right now. I imagine the funeral, his mom cracking up, Ginny and Bill fighting...it all must be agonizing for him. I agree with his assessment that a change of pace might be a good thing for them. Maybe going to Australia and having something constructive to focus on would help.


The ending was a relief. I'm glad that Ginny has calmed down some and was able to talk to Harry rationally. I understand the rage she's feeling and that she needs to let it out, but I also don't want her to go insane like Molly did. I hope maybe now she'll talk to Harry a little and allow herself to decompress. Sadly though, judging by the next chapter description, that won't be the case.


I can't imagine how difficult this story must be to write. I know it's been a bit emotionally exhausting reading it. I have to imagine that coming up with it had to have been exhausting too.


Good work as always. You write a very compelling story.



Gryffindor Red vs Gold Review Battle for December 2018

Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 08 Dec 2018 03:32 PM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Saying Goodbye

Hey Dan!


I'm back for another review for the Gryffindor Red vs. Gold Review battle for December 2018. I've finally managed to compose myself after that last chapter.


I don't really have adequate words for this chapter. I found it heartbreaking in some of the worst ways. It was hard enough to deal with Harry, Ron, Ginny, and Hermione mourning in their own ways, but the funeral was a new level of heartbreaking. Imagining Charlie, Bill, and Percy trying to all be strong and hold it together for everyone is just awful. Imagining them all saying goodbye at the side of Fred's grave is awful. But probably the most awful thing was Molly losing control. I know that the depths of her despair are unfathomably deep, but I think they've been made worse by the fact that she's refused to allow herself to mourn properly. She's been forcing herself to mother everyone else and not given herself the care she needed. She hasn't been sleeping properly and is possibly abusing cheering charms. It's a toxic recipe for disaster. I know she didn't intentionally hurt anyone, but to see her sending debris and shrapnel swirling was terrifying. I know no one wanted to hurt her, but why didn't anyone stun her? When Harry took out his wand, that's what I thought he was going to do at first.


I really hope Ron is ok. I really hope all of the Weasley's are physically okay. I know that mentally they aren't, but that will come with time. If Molly has hurt someone badly, it'll just add to all of the pain she's already dealing with.


Ugh. This was so brutal. I don't know how you wrote this. I don't know how I read it. I'm just a mess. Your writing was good, but this was an awful, horrible chapter to read. I know it was necessary in terms of talking about healing, but it didn't make it any easier.



Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 08 Dec 2018 03:00 PM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Deeper Understanding

Hey Dan!


I'm back for another review for the Gryffindor Red vs. Gold Review battle for December 2018. I've finally managed to compose myself after that last chapter.


Hermione and Ron can never go too long without bickering. It seems to be ingrained into them. I have a feeling that this might be different though. I don't think Ron is just arguing for no reason. I think something is bothering him deep down.


Oh Ginny. Off to find something sexy to wear for Harry. The honeymoon phase is a funny thing. And now Hermione is there and it's going to get awkward because that's what Hermione does, makes things awkward. Actually, this didn't turn out too bad. Ginny is managing Hermione's anxieties about Ron quite well.


I thought Hermione's point about Voldemort dying only three days ago was actually quite insightful. When you put it like that it does seem like they're all moving a bit fast, but I also feel like they have a lot of lost time to make up for. With all of the pain and the sorrow, I don't think it's wrong for them to experience some purely selfish joy.


I definitely understand where Harry is coming from in regards to his vaults. A couple of years ago, both of my grandparents passed away and they left me a small inheritance. It was a nice thing to receive, but also something I felt a bit guilty about because who wants to receive something from someone dying?


Wow. Harry is really rich. I hope he puts that money to good use. I'd love to think of him doing something to set Molly and Arthur up so that they'd be comfortable. After all the struggles the Weasley's have been through, they certainly deserve it.


I knew there was more to Ron arguing with Hermione than he was letting on. Of course, it was about the funeral and Fred's death. Purchasing robes makes it real. He's been holding it together all of this time, but of course, he needs to mourn. I'm glad Hermione is there for him.


Aww Hagrid. Bless him. He is the kindest character in the entire book. I'm convinced of it...and so massively underappreciated. Totally not tearing up right now.


Oh. I love that Harry got to meet his grandparents, even if it is in portrait form. He's never wanted anything as badly as he's wanted family, so I feel like this is at least going to give him a little bit of a relationship with them. I'm glad he also found pictures and mementos. I hope he sends Neville the pictures of him as a child with his parents.


This was a heavy chapter. A lot of emotions and things to process for all of the different characters. I imagine the next one will be too with the funeral coming up. You really write this complex emotional stuff well. On to the next one now!



Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 08 Dec 2018 02:17 PM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Raising the Stakes

Hey Dan!


I'm back for another review for the Gryffindor Red vs. Gold Review battle for December 2018. I've finally managed to compose myself after that last chapter.


The bit about Harry's nightmares is so sad. I mean, I thoroughly expect him to have nightmares as that is very common with post traumatic stress...and if anyone is going to have PTSD it's definitely Harry, but that didn't make it any easier. His comment about Voldemort not going away made it all the sadder. I'm glad that Ginny was there this time to ease his pain. Hopefully, at some point they'll be able to get some dreamless sleep potion.


The goblins are brutal. I mean I get their point about the wizards doing it to themselves. (Nice parallel to how the rest of the world feels about the USA right now.) But at the same time I feel like the goblins should be grateful to Harry for getting rid of a tyrant who would've inevitably been bad for them as well. I'm glad that they were able to negotiate a truce though. I'm also glad Harry saved Griphook, although I am a bit surprised by his coldness towards him. I figured Harry would've found someway to feel guilty about him too.


Ron is too cute. Look at him pining over Hermione. He's so head over heels and I love it. He just makes me want to give him a big hug.


Ginny and Harry are also adorable. The way they tease each other is definitely very accurate to how new relationships are. They're absolutely in that "can't keep my hands to myself" phase.


"....In the Slytherin dorm rooms next to Merlin himself." Dying. Ron is the best for comic relief.


Oh. So this is how Harry decides that he might want to become an Auror. I like that Proudfoot is quietly putting the idea back into his head. I know he needs a break and to recover, but I agree with her. I think he'll make an excellent Auror. Additionally, I think it will really help him refocus his mind if he has some sort of work that he feels is benefitting people.


You really do such a good job at writing this healing stuff. The ups and downs. The sad and the happy. I feel like I'm on a rollercoaster, but one that's thoroughly enjoyable. Good work.



Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 08 Dec 2018 01:33 PM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Naughty, Naughty



I honestly don't know if I can write a coherent review for this chapter. I was not at all expecting this. I mean I know Ron and Hermione are progressing and that Hermione can be a massive over thinker and Ron needs a lot of leading, but really I have no words.


I seriously almost s#%* a brick when Ron said Naughty, Naughty. Like I laughed for a good two minutes and then I went back and re-read it and laughed some more. Genuinely, one of the funniest things I've ever read. This had to be the most painfully awkward fooling around I've ever read. Like I'm embarrassed for the both of them. Poor sweet, innocent babies.


And omg, poor Ginny. How awkward to be all revved up and need the loo and find a hysterically sobbing Hermione. And then to have to hear about her brother's sex life or lack there of. I don't know how she did it. I was hurting for her though. I love her advice to blow his mind and to blow something else if she felt like it. Hermione needed a good wake up.


Ginny's advice was solid though. How could Hermione have thought Ron wouldn't need instructions or be scared to cross boundaries by accident? Blunt and bossy is best...especially for Ron.


I'm so glad the second go around was much less awkward. I might literally have died if it had been that bad twice.


I thought you captured the hilarity of first time sexual encounters quite well. I was very lucky to not have any super embarrassing experiences, but I've heard plenty of horror stories from my girlfriends. Although I have yet to hear of anyone shouting naughty, naughty. I'm still chuckling over that.


I have to tell you that this whole situation was made all the funnier by the fact that it's 5:15am over here and everyone in the house is asleep, so I'm trying to quietly conceal hysterical laughter and tears. I've read through this chapter two times now and it just doesn't stop being hilarious.


Great work as always! Oh before I forget for the Gryffindor Red vs. Gold Review Battle for December 2018.



Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 08 Dec 2018 01:14 PM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: The Heart's Desire

Hey Dan!


I'm back with another review for the Gryffindor Red vs. Gold Review Battle for December 2018.


Yes! Chinese food is amazing. I'm so glad Ron finally had a chance to experience it. And the dragons roaming loose everywhere sounds pretty epic.


Ron is the sweetest and Hermione is so painfully awkward. Clearly, she's been putting a lot of thought into the physical aspect of her budding relationship with Ron, but honestly I think she's way overthinking it. He very obviously wants her and also wants her to be happy and comfortable. I think it's sweet and very honorable that he doesn't want his answers to make her feel pressured. She is very much someone that has to come to the conclusion of what she wants to do on her own terms...and if he'd made her feel pressured, she'd just end up resenting it. I think he played things just right here.


The bit where she asked him how far he got with Lavender was a bit awkward. Talking about your ex with your current partner is never a fun task, but I think that it actually might help Hermione to know. I think it might encourage her along a little bit.


Aww. Yay! Ginny and Harry are back together. I knew that would happen eventually. Ginny isn't the same girl who let fear paralyze her.


Ooh. Bill Weasley has come to visit. I always really enjoyed his character. Calm and even, but with a dangerous edge. That was very thoughtful of Fleur to send them a basket.


I wonder how difficult the Goblins will be for Harry. I hope Kingsley and Bill are able to negotiate a truce. I understand why they're mad, but you'd think Harry having saved the world would be enough for them to get over it. Maybe Kingsley will use the fact that they were hiding a horcrux as a bargaining chip?


Love the jibe at Hermione and Ron. One day they will understand, probably fairly soon.


And more Ron and Hermione warm fuzzies. I hope Hermione gets fed up with waiting and jumps his bones. I have a feeling it won't be simply that easy though.


Another lovely chapter. This one has me feel a bit more optimistic about the whole situation. Slowly, things will start to get back to normal. Good job!



Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 08 Dec 2018 12:37 PM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Risk and Reward

Hey Dan!


I'm back with another review for the Gryffindor Red vs. Gold Review Battle for December 2018.


So It's 4am and I'm wide awake reading through chapters of this story as if I've got a deadline. Of course, I have no deadline. It's just so well-written that I'm having a hard time putting it down. My sleep deprived self thanks you.


I love that Kreacher has gone and cleaned up Grimmuald Place. I imagine not having the horcrux hidden there must've drastically improved his mood. No wonder he's so much more productive now. It hadn't really occurred to me before you mentioned it here how miserable it must've made him feel. Now that he's appreciated it and in a healthier environment, he's got the place back to its former glory. I'm glad for that because imagining Harry, Hermione, Ron, and Ginny going back to a dreary, depressing place sucks.


Even Sirius' mum's portrait is behaving better.


The parallels between Kreacher and Harry were perfect. Harry is just like him and doesn't even realize it. I'm glad that Ginny and Ron made snarky comments about it and I already know Hermione is going to give him a lecture about it later. His survivor's guilt is so big you could write a book about it.


Oh Ron. He's so transparent. He totally wanted Hermione to have her own room so he could pay her some nightly visits. I have a feeling though that as soon as Hermione works up the nerve, she'll be paying him some nightly visits of her own, likely soon since she keeps considering the physical aspects of their relationship. I think she's fantasizing enough to hopefully get her nerve up and go for it. It's kind of sweet that she's courageous enough to face down the Death Eaters, but terrified of taking the next step with Ron. I guess there is a little bit of innocence left in their world after all.


Aww. That last bit with Harry telling Ginny that he couldn't have left her a second time was so sweet. Thank you for at least a little bit of fluff in this otherwise very heavy story. I know Ginny is terrified that Harry will hurt her, but we all know how much he loves her. Leaving her was his warped way of protecting her and now that the war is over, I imagine he'll never let her go again.


I have to say, you are so good at writing young adult voices. You really nail all the anxieties and insecurities that are normal to a seventeen year old. Great work!



Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 08 Dec 2018 11:33 AM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Taking Flight

Hey Dan!


I'm back with another review for the Gryffindor Red vs. Gold Review Battle for December 2018.


Way to start this chapter out with a complete left hook. I'm still not recovered from everything that happened in the last chapter and now this. How could you do something as cruel as making Harry dream about Tonks and Remus begging him to help their child? That one really hurt.


The confrontation with Mrs. Weasley was also heartbreaking. I don't know how Harry could convince himself that she could ever hate him. All of the Weasleys think of Harry as family. All of them would've given anything to protect him.


I'm glad that there was a little bit of a bright spot in all of the sadness here. I loved that it was George who stepped up when Harry was being mobbed. It made me happy to see that a little spark existed within the deep depths of his mourning.


Aww. Bless Molly. She just wants to look after Harry. I wish he knew how to accept her love and care.


Oh. Our first glimpse at Percy and Arthur. Arthur's convo with Harry was very sad, but also what Harry needed. He needed to be reminded that he is their family. I'm glad that he agreed to be a pallbearer, even though I know the guilt is killing him. In time, I hope he comes to understand that the war and all of the death...none of it was his fault.


Ugh. The reporters are so awful for sneaking the cameras in. Adding a Geminio charm to it was a dastardly plan. Again, I'm thankful for George who seems to slowly be remembering himself. And of course he'd know a secret passage that even the Marauders hadn't found! I love it.


Ooh. This standoff between Molly and Ginny is intense. I get that she's underage, but surely after everything she's been through at the school, Molly could understand why she wouldn't want to be there. After being possessed there, after being tortured there, after seeing friends and family die there, why would she ever want to stay? I'm honestly impressed that she hadn't tried to leave before that point.


I'm glad that Ron stood up for her. I know she doesn't want to feel like her older brother has to look out for her, but I think Ron's reassurance is what Molly needed. She's so scared of losing anymore of her children. Knowing that Ginny won't be alone is a good thing.


On to the next chapter now! This story is so addicting.



Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 08 Dec 2018 10:55 AM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: The Seventh Horcrux Part 2

Hey Dan!


I'm back with another review for the Gryffindor Red vs. Gold Review Battle for December 2018.


This was a really interesting chapter, but I'm also not sure exactly what I want to say about it. In some ways, it was a summary of the entire Deathly Hallows book. In other ways, it really challenged me to think about Dumbledore, Snape, Harry, and everyone else involved a bit more objectively. In the re-telling it really hits home just how horrible everything Harry, Ron, and Hermione went through was. The idea that a teenage boy should be responsible for allowing someone to kill him in order to save the entire world is awful beyond words.


The confliction that Luna, Neville, Ginny, and McGonagall must feel towards Snape is unimaginable. To be tortured and suffer so greatly because of his indifference to monsters is bad enough, but then to find that you can't even hate him in peace because he was a hidden hero who swung the final tide of the war. That would be a bitter pill to swallow.


I loved the bit when Kingsley is talking about the arrangement of the portkey to Australia and Ron says that he'll be going too. Kingsley's response was absolutely perfect. Kingsley is one of my favorite minor characters. (I've actually written a couple of stories that feature him heavily) I'm glad to see you give him some attention here.


The round of applause from all of the headmasters and headmistresses' portraits was a lovely detail.


I hope that perhaps Ron, Hermione, Harry, Luna, Ginny, and Neville can all get some rest now. I wish Madam Pomfrey would just dose them all with some dreamless sleep potion and lock the hospital doors so they can rest.


Yes! Angry Minerva. Everything she said was spot on. Dumbledore left Harry like a lamb for the slaughter. I know he felt regret over it and didn't want to do it, but it doesn't really make it any better regardless. He deserved the scolding she gave him, even if everything worked out in the end.


Excellent work as always! Headed on to the next chapter now.



Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 08 Dec 2018 10:20 AM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: The Seventh Horcrux Part 1

Hey Dan!


I'm back with another review for the Gryffindor Red vs. Gold Review Battle for December 2018.


Ugh. Your description of George and Molly is so heartbreaking. Molly is mothering because she doesn't know what else to do, but it's going to come crashing down on her eventually. She has to allow herself to grieve at some point. And George, he isn't the same person that Ginny remembers. His other half is dead and that changes people. He'll eventually heal some and get back into the swing of things, but there is a piece of him that won't ever be the same.


Yes! A Neville POV. I really love that you're giving me a look inside the heads of so many characters. It really is such an effective way of conveying just exactly how much is going on around the castle. I love Luna and Neville together. I always thought they were a really sweet pairing. I'm glad that they've found some comfort in each other.


Rita skeeter is so awful. So are the rest of the media that are there hounding Hermione, Ron, Luna, and Neville. How dare Skeeter talk about Augusta that way. I understand the press wanting to be up to date, but after a war, how could they think that surrounding people like that was a good idea. I'm so glad that McGonagall put them in their places. I love the threat of amputation from the statues.


I think Harry is in the right here, regardless of how worried Hermione is. Everyone in the room has proven themselves trustworthy. They've all battled alongside Harry and they deserve to know whatever truth Harry can offer them.


I have to imagine this conversation is incredibly difficult for Harry though. Admitting that he'd been a Horcrux to Ginny was one thing. She understood it because she'd been possessed, but the others haven't...and although I think they'll support him, it must've been difficult to get past his insecurities that they might abandon him. I'll be curious to see how the rest of this goes in the next chapter (which I'm headed over to in just a moment.)


Your writing continues to amaze me, Dan. I know I sound like a broken record, but you really are a caliber above the rest. I hope someday that you consider writing a novel of your own. And if you do, please make sure I know about it so I can purchase a copy.


Good work as always!



Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 08 Dec 2018 09:46 AM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Finding the Way Forward

Hey Dan!


I'm back with another review for the Gryffindor Red vs. Gold Review Battle for December 2018.


You really captured Ginny well in the first bit of this chapter. I love how she thinks about her relationship with Harry. On one hand, it could help her heal, but on the other hand it might really hurt her again. The way she thinks of his damage and the fortresses around him is so accurate. He is damaged goods and she had to be sure she can hold up to the task of being involved with him before she goes and actually does it.


Ugh. And poor Harry, still torturing himself. How could he think those things about himself? Dumbledore trusted him because he knew the good in Harry far outweighed the bad in the Horcrux. He knew that the love he had for the people around him would drive him much harder than any dark impulses the Horcrux might've caused.


You know, oddly, it never occurred to me how much having a piece of a Horcrux in him might bother Harry or the fact that Ginny is really the only other person who could truly understand it. I'm so glad he opened up to her as they both really need to know they aren't alone. I love that Ginny called him a t*&$ because he kind of is. I mean after everything he's been through with Ron and Hermione, how could he possibly believe that they'd abandon him or wouldn't try to understand?


I'm glad that Harry invited Ginny, Luna, and Neville to the meeting with Kingsley and McGonagall. I think if there's anything that can be learned from Dumbledore, it's that keeping everything a secret is a bad idea. All of them have proven themselves trustworthy and I think they deserve to know the truth. I know that none of them will ever tell anyone else either. Plus, Harry needs the support. He needs to see that no one is going to turn away from him because of the truth. I was also very happy that he told Ginny how he feels about her and reminded her that she doesn't need to be alone. She needs time as does he, but I hope that as they heal, they'll find each other.


Yes! A Ron POV. I don't know if you know this or not, but Ron is one of my absolute favorite characters and I shop Ron/Hermione very hard. It always infuriates me when people say that Ron isn't right for Hermione. He's perfect. His steadiness. His goofiness. His laidback attitude. It's the perfect opposite to Hermione and really exactly what she needs.


I think you did a beautiful job handling their relationship here. I love that Ron is analyzing her trying to figure out the right response to her concerns about Harry and Ginny. I love that he twists it and says that they should offer a cover for Ginny and Harry to get some alone time. I love that he decides to go with Hermione to find her parents. Everyone else has someone else, but if he doesn't go with her, she'll have to go alone. She needs that support and his steadiness more than ever.


Also, I had a very good laugh at the drop bears bit. On a slight tangent, I belong to a women's travel group, and a girl asked a very sincere question about drop bear attacks in Australia as she was planning to visit. I told her "To prevent drop bear attacks, just rub a bit of Vegemite behind your ears. It works as a repellent." She didn't realize it was a joke, but all the Aussies in the group died laughing.


Anyway, another excellent chapter! Things are progressing nicely and quite realistically. I'm curious to see how this convo with McGonagall and Kingsley goes. On to the next chapter now!



Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 08 Dec 2018 09:09 AM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Lies Layered Upon Lies

Hey Dan!


I'm back with another review for the Gryffindor Red vs. Gold Review Battle for December 2018. I'm spending most of my weekend catching up on reading and reviewing, so as I told you in my previous review, that means I'll be catching up on your work because I have the time to really sit and enjoy it.


There is so much to talk about with this chapter! There is a lot going on. You've done such a good job of capturing all the chaos and conflicting thoughts of immediately after a battle. Everyone is sort of wandering around in a fog doing things that make little sense.


Poor Ginny and Harry. How embarrassing to get woken up by Hermione like that. One would hope that after their first night together they'd be able to wake up peacefully and cuddle, but the fates would never be that kind to Harry. The idea of him hoping around trying to get his underwear on was pretty funny though. I also almost died as Ginny's underwear floated up on Harry's glasses when Hermione summoned them. Could it get anymore awkward?


I do think Hermione's judgmentalness in this scenario is misplaced. Harry and Ginny have missed each other and have been consistently dealing with the fears that they might lose each other. Even if she doesn't find what they did the best way to cope, standing in the doorway being preachy isn't a cool thing to do. I'm glad she at least had the consideration to get Harry out before Mrs. Weasley or Professor McGonagall found him. I could imagine that being pretty uncomfortable.


Funny how a few minutes later Hermione is snogging the life out of Ron. I see that she's starting to understand how Ginny felt. I'm glad she at least realized that she was pretty rude to reprimand Ginny the way she had.


The bit with Ron and Ginny going back and forth bad acting was very amusing.


I had a good laugh over Hermione being embarrassed about Ron tossing her her bra and knickers. She really has got to loosen up a bit. I can't imagine being 17 and being so painfully shy. I mean they just lived in a tent for like a year together. You'd think those boundaries would've broken down just a bit.


I'm glad that Harry made it to Madam Pomfrey. The wounds he had sounded pretty bad and I can't imagine his physical exertion from the night before made them any better. I had a good laugh over Harry's line about it being cold. Poor guy. He just can't catch a break, can he? And of course, the wizarding world once again needs his help. I agree with Madam Pomfrey. They should just give him a break for once.


Ah. Hermione's righteous indignation at Harry towards the end was well-placed. No one died because of him. They all died fighting for freedom from a tyrant. Pretending it was anything different dishonors their sacrifice. I'm glad she checked him on that.


This was a really good chapter, Dan. Like I said in the beginning, it feels chaotic and very fast paced because so much happens in it, but that really is a good thing. It sort of gives the readers an insight into how overwhelmed the characters must be feeling. As always, you have a very deft ability to handle very difficult subject. This story has been excellent so far and I'm looking forward to getting to the next chapter in a minute.


Good job!



Name: Aurorofthelight (Anonymous) · Date: 08 Dec 2018 03:02 AM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Insecurities

Great to see a new chapter!  What a superb one it is!  Our heroes are going thru alot of pain as they struggle to recover!  Liked seeing the 3 super couples coming together!  Hope another chapter is coming soon! :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 06 Dec 2018 03:21 AM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Something to Feel

Hey Dan!


I'm here to leave a review for the Gryffindor Red Vs. Gold Review Battle for December 2018! Go team red! 


First let me apologize for the abysmally long time I've been away from reviewing your amazing stories. You are absolutely one of my favorite writers in the HP fandom, but because of that, I like to get to your stories when I really have time to focus and concentrate on all the rich details they include. Now that I'm home, I intend to make up for lost time.


This chapter was pretty bleak and depressing, but also quite realistic to what the end of war feels like. There is so much baggage for everyone to deal with and tempers can definitely flare. Sometimes you end up with a scenario where no one wants to talk because they feel guilty about sharing when everyone else is suffering. Then you get the scenario you've pictured so well where everyone is angry and things are exploding.


I thought you did a very tasteful job of describing the intimacy between Harry and Ginny. There was enough description to understand what was happening, but not so much that I felt the need to get smelling salts or faint or anything.


I also thought you captured something really well with Ginny that I don't quite know how to articulate. She talks about wanting this moment of intimacy with him because everything has been so terrible and she just wants a few moments of happiness. That almost physically made me hurt as I know that feeling all too well. Sometimes that physicality becomes an escape from all the messed up going on.


From my own personal experiences, I think you've really nailed PTSD, but then again, I expect nothing less from you. Your writing never fails to amaze me. I'll definitely be back for more soon.


Great work!



Name: LadyMarauder (Signed) · Date: 23 Nov 2018 10:52 PM · [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: The Beginning After the End

Tasha here reviewing for the RvG - Team Red!

How have I only just stumbled upon this gem? I don't know how I stopped reading after one chapter to write a review because I want to devour this!


I go through phases with Harry Potter and lately I've been looking for this story - THIS story. One that tells me exactly what happened in the exact moment JKR stopped writing. It really feels genuine and has so much heart, exactly as it should be. All three of them were perfectly written and I loved the little funny moments with Ron teasing Harry for being starkers. In all, I can see this chapter slotting right in.


The thing that really got me, was how emotional it was, even from the simple act of walking into the common room and it feeling smaller. I felt like I just wanted to hug them all and I liked they had that moment together where they just hugged, cried and breathed


Then when Harry tried to talk about Fred, Ron was perfect. I really, really loved that moment. Harry, will of course, feel totally guilty for everything. He probably will for the rest of his life.


Now, I'm off to read the rest of this!

Name: Anonymous (Anonymous) · Date: 08 Sep 2018 06:05 AM · [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Short Goodbyes

Great chapter can't wait for the next review


Name: Aurorofthelight (Anonymous) · Date: 14 Aug 2018 11:39 PM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Short Goodbyes

Marvelous chapter with lots of great action!  Wonder if they'll think to use veritaserum on the scum they caught?  Glad Hermoine  and Ron got on their way to Australia!  Also glad to see Neville stand up to his grandma for his lady!  Hope the next chapter comes quicker!  :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

Name: Anonymous (Anonymous) · Date: 13 Aug 2018 09:36 PM · [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Short Goodbyes

Meant for plot advancement or not, I loved it! There’s a lot of action as well as plenty of emotion tucked into each scene. I’m excited to see what’s next. 

Name: Anonymous (Anonymous) · Date: 12 Aug 2018 02:46 PM · [Report This]
Story:After Destiny Chapter: Small Accomplishments

I have so enjoyed these installments, I check back nearly every day for the new ones. Can’t wait to read more! 

Author's Response:

Hi, there! I'm really pleased you're enjoying the story. Chapter 19 is written and I'm in the process of editing it. I hope to have it up in the next day or two.




Submit a Review