Reviews For Burned by Ice

Name: Dojh167 (Signed) · Date: 14 Jul 2019 03:16 AM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

Ooh the every word counts challenge at hhpff was always my favorite. I tried to review as many of those as I could, but looking back on what’s left of hpff, I never got this one.


And my goodness, I missed out on this one! Your writing is really solid here, and you really use your words wisely so that they pack a punch. 


I just have to say, dying while thinking about a riddle you got wrong is one of the most Ravenclaw things I’ve ever heard. I enjoy Helena’s attitude toward the knocer. It is certainly an object that can be very frustrating to a lot of people, but especially if it was your mother’s design. 


Haha, the line about the worst qualities in a door knocker being pretentiousness and terrible timing is very funny.


That’s an interesting question or the knocker to ask, because it’s very opinion based, so really anyone could get in with whatever answer was relevant to him (but hey, graduation day, whose worried about people sneaking into Ravenclaw tower?). But it’s clear that there was a right answer for Helena personally, and it seems that the knocer knew that in a way. It kind of makes me think of the knocker as kind of like the sorting hat in its intuition of people. 


This is both a heartbreaking moment, and one that does a good job of demonstrating Helena’s character. Nice job.

Name: Oregonian (Signed) · Date: 11 May 2019 06:44 AM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

For the Slythein May EvS Review Battle.


This is an unexpected event to be written as a Missing Moment -- the final thoughts of Helena Ravenclaw as she dies at the hands of the Baron.


The final question of the doorknocker was not a real riddle, but just a question, a solicitation of Helena's opinion/preference, so there really cannot be a correct answer in an absolute sense.  The image comes to mind of Bilbo Baggins playing the ancient riddle game with Gollum, where Bilbo suddenly asks, "What do I have in my pocket?" and the question is labeled as not actually a riddle.


The poem from which this story's theme was taken equates "fire" with "desire", and maybe for the Baron his initial emotion was desire, but it is interesting that you have chosen to have fire exemplify different emotions -- anger and jealousy -- for Helena.  


When speaking with Harry in Deathly Hallows, Helena simply says, "I sought to make myself cleverer, more important than my mother."  Those words do not express the intensity of what she felt as described in your story.  "...she'd competed against the one she should not have had to: her mother."  But whose fault was that?  Countless children over the ages have struggled with the challeng and burden of growing up in the shadow of an accomplished parent.


The poem equates "ice" with "hate" and Helena considers herself familiar with that emotion also.  But whom did she hate?  The Baron, for pursuing her?  Her mother, for representing an impossible standard?  Or did she feel hated (unloved) by her mother for not living up to "wit beyond measure"?


How sad.


A thought-provoking little story.  Thank you for writing.



Name: starbuck (Signed) · Date: 18 Jan 2019 01:37 AM · starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

your prose is absolutely beautiful, and honestly, your ability to tell great and impactful stories filled with emotion in just a few words is something i think a lot of people struggle with (i know i do!) but both in this story and in 'the department of spectral affairs' it's obviously your strength. you have managed to capture helena's jealousy of her mother, her envy, her rage, everything she felt towards her, perfectly. you also made her an unlikeable character (at least to me) but that doesn't take away from the story in the slightest. in fact, making me like a story with that sort of character just shows that the story is amazingly well-written. even if i don't like helena, i'd like to know more about her, about the day she graduated and left, about the baron (besides the things we already know).  i'd like to know about her relationship with her mother and why it was so strained - is it just helena's personality that horribly clashed with her mother's? i particularly like the line you used in the summary of the story, it's hauntingly sad and beautiful at the same time.


Author's Response:

Oh, thank you so much for such high praise! I think I'd written two 500-word stories before writing this one, so I was still quite new to the extra short story format. Over the years, I've come to really enjoy the challenge of crafting a story within a word limit. It's actually quite fun! This has come as a surprise to me as I am usually quite verbose. I really loved writing this character study because Helena has a lot to be indignant and angry about, starting with her mother, and ending with her murder at the hands of a man who doesn't understand the concept of "no". She is quite unlikeable, but she's just so snarky! She's hopefully one of those characters here that you love to hate!


Thanks so much for the wonderful review, Kris :)


xx 800

Name: wildest dreams (Signed) · Date: 27 Dec 2018 04:25 PM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

Hi! I'm here from the review tag thread! I don't often read founders era but this one kind of intruiged me and I actually really loved it. Even though it's short, it's so impactful, the emotions and the way the whole one-shot connects is super, super cool, and I (perhaps ironically?) was left with chills! I really liked how you wrote Helena, I always feel quite protective of her, and I think you did so well with her; especially with the way you characterized her! I also really liked the themes of fire and ice in death, and how the quote tied into the moment of her death, and how it seems she's thinking about something as trivial as a riddle but it also speaks a lot to her death and also how she views her life! I really liked reading this and I'll definitely be back to read some more of your work in the future because I really like your style of writing!

- Hannah

Author's Response:

I don't often read Founders era (or write them - this is my only one) and so this was fun, new experience for me. I'm so glad you enjoyed it! It was supposed to be a little creepy, but I'm not really a horror person, so I was worried about that actually coming across. I really enjoyed writing Helena. She has this long-suffering air about her, but she's also quite haughty, even as she's dying. Honestly, I wanted to capture the indignation that I felt when we learnt that it was the Bloody Baron who killed her, because she didn't want to be with him. Yet another man thinking a woman owes him everything! But I also didn't want to give the Bloody Baron the time of day, so I had her reflecting on other moments in her life. Plus I love that Robert Frost poem, so that was a bonus!


Thanks so much for the lovely review, Hannah!


xx 800

Name: Frankie05 (Anonymous) · Date: 13 Sep 2018 12:36 AM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

Transferred from offsite at request of the author

Originally left on 08/31/2015

Hi there. I love the every word counts challenge because I think it is definitely one of the harder challenges. You need to get your point across- actually have a story - and have a beginning middle and an end. Plus it needs to be coherent. You did that. And it was done well. I haven't read much about founders but your story has made me want to get to know those characters better. I love how you incorporate the Ravenclaw common room into it. A simple question. As if the riddler knows the person it's asking and it needs to think about what the person said. It was her last encounter with the house before she died and how ironic the question. It almost makes me feel baddie her. That her whole existence was spent fighting and fire and now that she is dying she's rethinking thY. It is a very interesting concept that you showed magnificently.

And bloody baron killed her during be throes of passion. Man that is depressing!

Great job on the story :) I really enjoyed it!


Author's Response: I love writing for the Every Word Counts challenge! You're right - it can sometimes be very difficult, but completing it is always so rewarding. Gah! Thank you so much! This story was tough to write, so I really appreciate it. I write weird things when I write for this challenge, and it always makes me push my writing boundaries. I'm glad you feel a little ambivalent towards Helena - I feel the same, so I wanted readers to feel that way too.

Thanks so much for the lovely review :)

Name: Godric’sFamulus (Anonymous) · Date: 13 Sep 2018 12:36 AM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

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Originally left on 05/21/2015

My mentor, Gryffindor has been concerned about Helena. He had tried to comfort Rowena Ravenclaw, but her sorrow is immeasurable. She burned of jealousy of her own daughter. She felt exhausted after the flaring fire died, her heart was scorched with the heat of anger of her own daughter. Her affection towards her was misunderstood. Her intention to train her daughter hard provoked her to envy her. What she had treated her daughter so harsh led Helena to ignore the passion of love, which turned her heart as cold as ice.

She regretted that she sent the Baron to Helena. She had no idea he would wield the brutal knife and thrust it into the heart of her daughter. Considering how she has suffered the pain like you described in the story, Rowena is blaming herself. She's crying by my mentor. She wants to meet her daughter, but she chose to be a ghost of Hogwarts, so she can't see her again.

While she was reading your story which told the sad, the very last moment of her life, she shed tears. When she read the tale that Helena thought of the riddle at the last moment, made her mother be proud of her daughter, at the same time, Rowena wished, ""Oh, Helena, you don't have to worry about the riddle any more. I'm sorry that I've restrained you with the fetters, the daughter of Rowena Ravenclaw.""

You described Helena Ravenclaw very well. She had struggled with the riddle even at the last moment when she was going to die, thinking hard which she should choose ice or fire. All words you wrote are so beautiful.







Those feelings were greater than

the state of acute pain.

Rowena feels thankful to you for your excellent job. We can't stop feeling sympathetic to her even though she'd been bratty through her life.

Author's Response: I do not envy Godric's job at all. And go figure that both mother and daughter were jealous of each other. That must have been a fun relationship. I'm doubly glad that I am not Godric, now! But I do feel a little bad for Rowena. I'm sure she tried her best, but sometimes even our best intentions go awry.

The Baron is one crazy dude. I wouldn't send him on any sort of mission, ever. He is really only suited to be seen brooding in the distance on some heather or something. And I think it's a strange choice for Helena to return to Hogwarts after her death. Maybe, in her own way, she wanted to be close to her mother after all.

*hugs for Rowena* I hope she found some peace through this story. And I'm glad that she felt a little pride for her daughter. Both of them are remarkable women.

I am glad that Rowena enjoyed it. Thank you for conveying that message. And thank you, as well, for this lovely review!

Name: Shadowkat (Anonymous) · Date: 13 Sep 2018 12:36 AM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

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Originally left on 05/02/2015

Okay, I know you wanted a review on your new story, but I can't resist the Founders era. For so few words, this was incredibly good.

Author's Response: Who can resist Founders era, am I right? Thanks for reading!

Name: krazyboutharryginny (Anonymous) · Date: 13 Sep 2018 12:36 AM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

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Originally left on 04/25/2015

Hey! I'm here from the review tag thread on the forums!

This story is really cool. To be honest with you, it isn't quite ""creepy"", but it was definitely a bit disturbing and kinda haunting.

Helena Ravenclaw is a character that I've never thought to explore much. From the books, I always kind of thought she was a bit of a brat. But here you gave us some really interesting insight into her motivations and her character.

The idea of Helena lying there dying and thinking of the riddle from the doorknob is one that I think will really stick with me. It's very interesting that she considered her answer to the riddle her greatest failure - and it's a detail that gives us so much insight into her psyche. I also like how you included details that really made it clear how much she was focusing in on thinking about this - like the number of syllables and words in the riddle.

So yeah, this is a really great little story that has me lying here thinking about mortality and stuff :P It's made me want to look into reading more about this character. Great job!


Author's Response: Heya!

Haha, yeah this was my first attempt at anything close to resembling creepy. It didn't quite feel creepy to me, but I'm pleased that it was a little disturbing and haunting.

She came off as a bit of brat to me as well, so it was fun to write her being bratty to the very last - but like a brat with depth.

Helena Ravenclaw struck me as a person whose priorities aren't quite straight. I also chose for her to fixate on the riddle to illustrate the way her mind has begun to wander in her final moments. Things that wouldn't be worth half a moment of time when she was alive take on a new weight in this place between life and death.

I'm pleased that it got you thinking! Thanks so much for the lovely review :)

Name: The Ten Plagues of Egypt #3 : Biting Insects (Anonymous) · Date: 13 Sep 2018 12:36 AM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

Transferred from offsite at request of the author

Originally left on 04/03/2015

I come with flame and sword to render judgement upon the houses of Hogwarts.

And Lo there shall come ten plagues visited upon the stories of HPFF; behold the third plague as biting insects rise up and spread amongst your peoples …

… you see biting insects would cause one to itch or scratch, which is a kin to frostbite as they both effect the skin. There is a causal link in there somewhere (albeit tenuous), and anyway it is the fault of all you HPFF writers out there for not mentioning or including references to lice or fleas in any stories that I could find!


Peevishness is not becoming of the voice of the plague so I shall move on.

The eye of judgement has fallen upon:



Thus it did come to pass that Helena Ravenclaw did come to pass.

Slain by the hand of the Baron in a fit of unrequited passion.

This much we know, this much is cannon, but what were her last moments like?

800 words of heaven has dared the heavens themselves to posit an answer.

What we have been given is a story with no purpose, with no plot. The petulant whinings of a spoiled girl, unable to overcome her mother’s shadow. When faced as she is with the infinite, she obsesses and is fixated upon a seemingly trivial question that she is unable to ascertain the relevance of; one that even the least astute reader knows the purpose of.

What we are given is a story that fits exactly with what we know of the character of Helena Ravenclaw herself. She was purposeless and ultimately pointless; her presence in the story of Harry Potter is merely to provide a link to something of her mother’s. To have such an exploration of her character explored through the structure of a story is a brilliant device.

The poem that accompanies, and some ways inspires, the story provides a rich textual underpinning for the reader. Which again reinforces the lack of wisdom that the protagonist possesses. The reader sees the truth in the words of the poem, sees the prophetic nature of the door-knocker’s question.

As the poem shows, as the manner of her death denotes, the final indignity that she faces is that there was no correct, nor no incorrect, answer to the riddle. She thinks she has answered wrongly, but again it is her lack of understanding and lack of character that serves to misconstrue the purpose behind the question in the first place.


An almost pointless tale about an almost pointless individual.

When the reader though, views the story through the lens discussed here – that the very structure and the nature of the story is used as a device to further our understanding of the character of the protagonist – and combined with the accompanying and inspirational poem; it elevates what the author was trying to achieve and does achieve.

Review done for the Ravenclaw, spread the Easter Cheer challenge.

Author's Response: Okay. So I'm so so so sorry for how long it's taken me to reply to your wonderfully detailed review. It is just so mindblowingly amazing, that I had to mentally prepare myself for months.

A connection is all you need, no matter how tenuous it may be! And on behalf of all HPFF writers, I defend our choice of not writing about lice or fleas. Their mysterious parasitic lives defy even our combined creative strengths to capture their essence in the form of the written word.

I'm seriously quaking in my fluffy socks right now, because you come on behalf of Ravenclaw House to pass judgement on a story about a Ravenclaw alumnus written by someone who sometimes likes to pretend that they are worthy of Ravenclaw glory. Don't eat me. *passes chocolate bar as bribe*

Yes! It most certainly does have no purpose and no plot, because Helena is dying and her thoughts are slipping away and she's focused on the most mundane of things because she's a spoilt brat who only really thinks about herself. Judgement totally deserved!

Ah, thank you! It must hurt her, even now, even in death, that she cannot surpass her mother in importance. Yes, she was really important in helping Harry, but in the end, it was important because it pertained to her mother, not her. No, Helena Ravenclaw is all but forgotten in the swirling dusts of history.

Haha, I cheated a lot by using that poem! I didn't have to do any work at all in terms of building complexity, because the poem does it for me. In that sense, I am really, no better than Helena.

You have hit the nail right on the head with all your wisdom, oh mighty Plague. There really is no right or wrong answer. And Helena is just a touch too obtuse and caught up in herself to see that.

Thank you so much for your judgement, Plague! I most wholeheartedly accept it.

PS: Your review is wonderful. You are wonderful. Thank you.

Name: Peter Cottontail (Anonymous) · Date: 13 Sep 2018 12:36 AM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

Transferred from offsite at request of the author

Originally left on 03/30/2015

You know, the beginning of this reminded me of a story that one of the older bunnies used to tell about a girl who was stabbed by this guy who was in love with her because her mother ordered him to find her. I wonder if it's the same thing...

Anyway, creepy is definitely the right word for this. I think I'm going to have to take a quick trip back to April Valley after this for a pick me up. Wow wow wow, you did brilliantly capturing the frustration and futility that Helena felt in these last few moments. The words that you used were just so spot on and fit perfectly to what you were trying to convey here. All the jellybeans for you!

The parts that incorporated Robert Frost's poem were so so good. That's such an interesting question isn't it? Whether you want to perish in fire or ice? I mean, I'd pick ice probably, but wow I love how you incorporated everything. Everything about this story is just absolutely fantastic. I'm pretty much at a loss for words.

Oops, I gotta get going. These Easter baskets aren't going to deliver themselves you know! And now I think I might have to go look up that story that old Wellington B. Bunny used to tell us...

-Peter Cottontail

Author's Response: Hello Peter Cottontail! This was a lovely Easter surprise!

I, too, have heard of this story. Indeed, they are one and the same. You're incredibly clever for figuring that out.

This story isn't something that spreads the Easter cheer, does it? I'm sorry. But I'm pleased that you enjoyed it all the same. Helena was a challenge to write, because she can be so incredibly annoying sometimes. And yay for jellybeans!

You're probably the first of my readers to pick ice! I think everyone else has picked fire. But an interesting question, and like Helena learnt, not one that is easy to answer.

Thank you so much for taking time out of your busy Easter schedule to read my story :)

Name: Debra20 (Anonymous) · Date: 13 Sep 2018 12:36 AM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

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Originally left on 02/03/2015

Hey there!! I am late with the review as well. I have no shame but I've been buried in schoolwork and could not manage to take a breath before now. Sowy :(

As for this story...I thoroughly enjoyed it! It's sooo rare to see stories about the Founders (or at least, I can't find enough of them) that when I do it's impossible not to read one. Especially stories about either Helena or Helga which I think is very unfair because I can feel there's a lot more to them than meets the eye and writers waste a lot of opportunities only focusing on Gryffindor or Slytherin. So basically that's the reason I chose to read this story, even though you have so many other enticing stories to choose from!

For a whole I've thought that shorter stories are easier to write because, well...there aren't many words to it, right? Right? WRONG! It really takes skills to write a story shorter than 1000 words and transmit something to the readers, especially emotions and thoughts (because there can't be many action scenes in 700 words). And you really have those writer skills needed. I was pulled into the story and Helena's last moments especially by the moment you chose to portray, her remembering that particular riddle to the entrance of the Ravenclaw CR. The duality of the terms, fire and ice, describe what we know of her life very well and because of that, her choice (fire) makes even more sense. She has led a troubled life ignited by the fire of her passions. Even if we didn't have time to explore her personality per se, this moment showed more about her and the way she thinks than any other moment could. In my opinion.

A very enthralling snippet indeed!

Author's Response: *late reviews hi-5!*

They are super rare. It's a difficult era in which to write. I've never attempted it before because I didn't want to deal with all that history, but there's something inherently creepy about the Founders' era for me, so I thought it was a good setting for my first intentionally creepy story. I wish there were more Helga stories! And definitely more Helga stories about Helga, and not her love for Gryffindor or Slytherin, or whoever. She seems like a really cool lady, but sort of underestimated like her House.

Gah! Thank you! I enjoy writing 500-word stories. I feel as if the normal pressures in story-writing, such as dialogue AND description AND this AND that are removed when the word count is smaller because automatically the reader expects less. You can really choose to focus on just one part which is always fun. I'm so pleased that her choice made sense given what we know about her. As a ghost she's rather more mellow and so I was worried about that choice translating well to when she was actually alive.

Thanks for the wonderful review :)

Name: TheHeirOfSlytherin (Anonymous) · Date: 13 Sep 2018 12:36 AM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

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Originally left on 01/27/2015


This was brilliant. I loved the moment in Helena's thoughts, that as she was dying her last thought would be of a Ravenclaw riddle. It just seems fitting in a way, being a Ravenclaw in life and then their ghost in death. But mostly because it's so... mundane, compared to dying. But they're always what seem to be the most common thoughts after something bad.

I really enjoyed reading this!


Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it. It was a different sort of piece for me since I've never written Founders era before, nor have I ever tried to be intentionally creepy. But yes, I wanted it to also seem natural: she's a Ravenclaw, and a good one, despite how people thinks she stacks up to her mother. What other than a riddle would occupy her mind in her last moments? And you've hit the nail on the head by saying her thoughts are rather mundane. She isn't thinking about her place in the universe, or what comes after death, or whether her life has been a good or bad one. She's just hung up on this one riddle.

Thanks for the lovely review :)

Name: alicia and anne (Anonymous) · Date: 13 Sep 2018 12:36 AM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

Transferred from offsite at request of the author

Originally left on 01/24/2015

I don't often read founders/almost founders stories, but I'm glad that I read this one shot.

Even though you don't use many words, you really got across a great deal of emotion and I couldn't help but imagine what Helena was going through.

I did like how all she could worry about was the knocker, even though she was 'burning' I think that I would have chosen fire as well, but thinking about it at least ice would be numbing... although it would also burn... I don't even know now haha.

I really enjoyed this and I must say that you really are such a talented writer. I'm really enjoying reading your work :D

Author's Response: I get that - I'm the same. But I thought I'd give a new era a try in an attempt to diversify my writing. Also stories set in Founders era are just inherently creepy to me.

Yes! Achievement unlocked! I really wanted Helena's rather snarky personality to come through despite the fact that she's dying.

Almost everyone is choosing fire! I'd choose it myself, but I don't think there's really a right answer to this question. It's probably why even the knocker was stumped.

Thank you! I really appreciate it :)

Name: Maelody (Anonymous) · Date: 13 Sep 2018 12:36 AM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

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Originally left on 01/20/2015

Robert Frost is my fave, man! :3

So this one was interesting, but only in the best possible ways! Founders, no matter what form, are always hard for me to write. I know this isn't founders per se, but still too close for comfort for me! You do such a good job with it, though! In what little words you used, it brought out every emotion I would imagine Helena going through at that moment.

I'm ashamed to admit it (don't take this as a knock towards what you accomplished here) but I sort of laughed when Helena was upset about the doorknocker at first. I sort of thought that maybe it would be one of those funny types, but I was wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong. It was amazingly haunting though! I loved the riddle, and initially, I chose fire too when I read it. Now I feel like I need to reevaluate everything and go back. :/

So in a way she was still right though! Cause, like you say, either way she was burned. So maybe she even stumped the knocker, eh? That's why it was so quiet for all that time? ;)

I did love this piece though! It was such an interesting time, plot, and setting to choose! I bet it did LuLu proud! ;)

I'm sure you're (not) hearing this by now, but I love your work and you're an amazingly gifted writer! I've loved everything of yours I've read so far and I highly doubt I will be disappointed any time soon (if ever). :)


Author's Response: I'm not a huge poetry fan, but I think this is my favourite poem. Robert Frost just gets it.

I knew while I was writing this that it wasn't typical Founders fare. I've always shied away from the era because I don't know how to accurately portray the time period. So I tried something a little introspective here, and hoped that my weird sense of humour worked despite it being a rather grim setting.

It's a good thing you laughed! I guess the best way to describe this story is a black comedy, I guess. Except it's not exactly ""comedy"" - it just makes you snort sometimes (hopefully). I'd choose fire as well, but I don't think you could ever pick right.

The knocker was definitely stumped. It was weird that it asked such a question. It's a tough choice.

Ah! Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it, despite it being rather weird.

Name: Lululuna (Anonymous) · Date: 13 Sep 2018 12:36 AM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

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Originally left on 12/01/2014

YOU WROTE A STORY FOR ME?? HOW DID I NOT KNOW THIS?? ♥ Isn't that just the sweetest thing!

(Btw I'm not counting this review as part of our swap so I'll review another story after :P)

I really love Helena and Founders and Frost's poem, so this was just such a lovely read. And perfectly creepy as well! Especially the comments about the Baron being reserved yet violent in the throes of passion - eep.

I absolutely loved this line: Her heat seeped into the decay on which she lay. Her mind frosted; her thoughts crystallised; her heart pattered its last. It was just beautifully written and really resounded with me. Also the last line was perfect.

I like how despite being creepy and ominous, this story has your familiar humour and voice particularly when she's addressing the knocker and how it represents so much that she hates. The characterization here is so strong and really reminiscient of the Helena we met in the book. I felt that her resentment against her mother was great too, really showing how bitter she was that she felt she had to compete with her. She's right: that really isn't fair.

Great job with this, dear! And THANK YOU!! ♥

Author's Response: *blushes* *dies* *blushes more*

Ahh! I'm so incredibly happy that you liked it! Creepy is not my forte AT ALL, but I tried. I'm glad that I did - Helena was surprisingly fun to write.

Your stories always have the most beautiful descriptions, and I suck at descriptions, so I really tried with this one. I think that's my favourite line in the entire story. I'm pleased you liked it.

Haha. I couldn't help the way the humour creeped in. I just couldn't imagine Helena being all dramatic and angsty as she died. She'd definitely be one of those people who'd be like ""well, great. Now I'm dying. That totally sucks."" Her relationship with her mother is complicated, and was probably the hardest part to articulate. I'm glad that it all came across!

Thank you for the lovely review! And also thank you for being a very wonderful person in general :)

Name: AdinaPuff (Anonymous) · Date: 13 Sep 2018 12:36 AM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

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Originally left on 10/13/2014


When I chose to read this one shot, I never would have thought it was written quite like this. The last thing I assumed was that she would be thinking over a riddle during her last breaths-yet, in a way, this makes it so much more tragically beautiful. How she, the daughter of Rowena Ravenclaw, answered a riddle incorrectly.

The writing in this was beautiful. You managed to fit in her fears, pains, concerns, and regrets all in such a short amount of words. It was amazing. I loved every sentence.

Thanks for the swap!


Author's Response: Hello!

I'm glad you liked it, despite it not being what you expected. And what else would a true Ravenclaw being thinking of in those last moments? :P

I'm pleased you enjoyed Helena's portrayal. She was a lot of fun to write!

Thanks for the review :)

Name: adluvshp (Anonymous) · Date: 13 Sep 2018 12:36 AM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

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Originally left on 10/09/2014

Hello! Here for review tag. I am also combining this with your challenge prize review (Color and Emotion challenge) =)

This was a very powerful and beautifully written piece, despite being so short. I loved your descriptions. The idea of Helena in her dying state was interesting and I enjoyed the way you portrayed her final thoughts. The concept of the door knocker was amusing and the question was thoughtful. I also liked how you wove that in with Helena's own personality.

All in all, a great little narrative, and surely a bit creepy. I had fun reading this! Now, 4 reviews remain to be given =)




Author's Response: Hello! Thanks for dropping by!

Ah! Thank you so much! I think I can only write descriptions when I write 500-word stories. Otherwise, I get stumped :P I'm really glad that you enjoyed it! It's a different sort of story from what I've written before, but I still really enjoyed myself.

Thanks for the lovely review :)

Name: Gabriella Hunter (Anonymous) · Date: 13 Sep 2018 12:36 AM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

Transferred from offsite at request of the author

Originally left on 10/06/2014


This is Gabbie from the forums with your review and have we spoken before now? I feel as though we haven't so it's nice to meet you and I hope we continue to swap stories and such. :D

So, this was a really interesting way to start out a story! I thought that this was going to be completely different from what I read but I was pleasantly surprised. I don't read a lot of Founders era fics and they're not my favorite but I think that you wrote this really well! I liked that this one-shot started out on such a dark note, Helena's death wasn't smothered in a lot of detail either. It gave me a chance to really get into her character better and while it wasn't at all pleasant to see her dying, there was something so sad about her final thoughts that really gripped me.

Strange what you linger on in your most dire moments, isn't it? I liked that the riddle stayed on her mind, taunting her a little. Was she right or wrong? Was her anger towards her mother her downfall? It leaves me wondering but I liked that she acknowledged her own faults towards the end, even while she burned.

I don't think that Helena was annoying at all and from your CC, I thought that this was really well-written. It makes sense to me and I was able to follow what you were going for without any difficulty. :D

Thanks for the read!

Much love,


Author's Response: Heya! I feel like we might've, like I've just over-enthusiastically posted on one of your statuses or something. I do that a lot.

I'm glad that you were pleasantly surprised! It's the only sort of surprise that I like, so yay! But now I'm really curious to know what you thought it was going to be like... I'm also really pleased that you still enjoyed the story despite the era not really being your cup of tea. All the nice things you've said is just all the better :D In terms of detail, I don't write description all that well, so I really skimmed over it. And I didn't want to dwell on the physical aspect of dying that much since it was just so superfluous to what Helena was thinking. Like, she didn't really care about the physical act of dying all that much. Does that even make sense?

Gosh, I wrote Helena as a really weird cookie here, but I felt like it fit. You're right - it's weird what you think about in those direst of moments. You can never really pick right between fire and ice, but Helena gave it a shot, and yeah. She does come to terms with how horrible a person she was, which was interesting to write.

And yay for flow! Woohoo!

Thanks for the lovely review :)

Name: Moonyxluna (Anonymous) · Date: 13 Sep 2018 12:36 AM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

Transferred from offsite at request of the author

Originally left on 10/03/2014

Hi I'm here with your requested review!

This was brilliant. I read Frost's poem in college so it's been a while (not that long... lol) and I think you captured the style/theme of it so wonderfully. You can't really ever pick right (fire/ice) and the way the doorknocker sort of contemplated her answer was very interesting, and entertaining to the theme.

As far as your concerns, yes, the story makes sense! I really loved it, actually. In her dying moments, instead of thinking about what lead up to the moment, the riddle plagued her mind. Very Ravenclaw, if anything :P (considering! haha) Obviously I don't know what the moment of death feels like, but from what we've seen of 'the little moment', I think you capture it very beautifully. (I hope that sentence makes sense to you.)

All of the insults she calls the doorknocker (turkey, chicken) made me grin every time.

I enjoyed Helena's voice. She's fiery with the witty comments about the knocker, and thoughtful with her contemplation about the answer she gave.

I loved the lines of the heat of anger and the burn of jealousy. It wrapped in nicely with the inspired poem and the theme, and made this so beautifully tragic.

Wonderful work! Thanks for requesting such a beautiful piece.


(p.s. I was just about to hit post on this review when I noticed the chapter title 'Frostbite' - Witty. heh.)

Author's Response: Heya!

Thank you! I adore this poem so this means a lot ^.^ And one really can't pick right, can they? I think the doorknocker knew that and was just like, ""tee hee. Just wait until she finds out!""

I'm glad that the story makes sense! And yeah, that's what I wanted to highlight about Helena, that despite it all, she was a Ravenclaw to the end, just not the person she wanted to be.

She really hates the doorknocker. I'm happy that the insults made you smile!

I loved writing that dichotomy into her. She's dying, and she's being sarcastic, but she's still thinking about what this all means and how much of her life was spent doing things that didn't really mean much in the end.

And I'm glad all the word choices worked well! Thank you for the lovely review :)

Name: kenpo (Anonymous) · Date: 13 Sep 2018 12:36 AM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

Transferred from offsite at request of the author

Originally left on 09/30/2014

Hello! I'm leaving for dinner in about two minutes, so I only have time to leave a quick review, but it was such a nice little story, how can I resist?

I love this Era so much. It always produces such elegant, graceful stories, and yours is no exception. I really loved the voice in this, even with only 500 words you packed a lot of personality in. My favorite part was that she called it a pretentious turkey. And the line ""It was the last one she’d ever heard from the metal beak of that blasted chicken with illusions of grandeur.""

She's so great. I like her!

The dedication was also really sweet! And shush, you're not being lazy, you're being wonderful.

Like I said, this would be a short review because... yup. I'm a little late for dinner.

Great story!! I really enjoyed it!


Author's Response: Aww! Thanks so much! I'm sort of pleased that it was nice enough to keep you away from your dinner!

I've never written in this era before, but I do love reading stories written in this era for the same reasons as you. I'm so glad that you feel that it's up to those standards!

I'm glad you like her! She's a bit pretentious and annoying, but I feel here it works in her favour and adds to her charm.

Haha! Thank you, you're too kind! I'll believe you and say I'm being creative!

Thanks for the lovely review :)

Name: shadowkat678 (Signed) · Date: 15 Dec 2017 08:16 PM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

*pops up and hurls snowball* INCOMING!

I love Founder's stories. There just aren't enough of them, you know? And as a Ravenclaw I HAD to check out this one.

It was short, but still very good. I like how you compared Helena to fire, which is the opposite of what most people portray her mother as. I was curious as to why you said she answered the riddle wrong until the end, since the door still opened. Which was clever. It wasn't that her answer was wrong, it's that Helena HERSELF was wrong. Which is probably why she's thinking about it so much.

It highlights her anger. At life. At her mother. At expectations. Helena wanted to be her own person, but she let that consume her. Just like fire. Then she burnt out.

I liked the style of it. Stream of consciousness stories are some of my favorites, because it really lets you get intimate with the thoughts and emotions of a character. You can feel the bitterness here. The self-hatred she's built up alongside the resentment of her mother.

"How could she feel anything else, when all her life she'd competed against the one person she should not have had to: her mother."

This wasn't what she wanted. I believe that could also be a comparison of ice and fire. She wanted warmth. She wanted her mother to love her, but instead she felt distant and cold. She hated that cold, so she tried everything she could to burn Rowena off from her.


All in all, a great story for my favorite era. See you around, and good luck!

Author's Response:

*tries to dodge snowball* *doesn't succeed*


There aren't that many Founders stories out there, I agree. I guess they're not as popular as other characters, plus I, at least, find it difficult to do historical accuracy justice.


Riddles can be tricky, sometimes. I think even if Helena had picked ice, she'd have picked the wrong answer. The riddle itself doesn't really have the perfect answer. She dwells so much on her "failure" because she is angry with everything.


This is a different style for me! I'm happy you liked it.


Thanks for the lovely review :)

Name: Gwennan's Ghost (Anonymous) · Date: 20 Sep 2017 04:01 AM · [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

Ah, Helena. Now this is someone with whom I have several things in common. Things like dying. I am also dead.


Poor Helena had rather a tragic end, didn't she? It is little wonder that she doesn't speak of it. To be killed by a man who loves you, in a fit of rage... Well, certainly, you depicted her anguish very well. The fire and ice imagery contrasted nicely and filled my mind with images of what it felt like for Helena in these moments. I could almost physically feel again...


I am glad to know that Helena, too, had difficulties with the Ravenclaw riddles. I once spent five hours sat outside their common room, unable to solve the blasted things... Give me the warmth and proximity of the kitchens any day, thank you very much.


Regardless, I very much enjoyed the portrayal of the way Helena's mind lingered over something distant and seemingly insignificant at the time of her death, as the mind is wont to do... They are strange things, are they not?


Congratulations on a well-crafted and interesting story.

Author's Response:

Being dead - just ghost things.


She did have a very tragic end, yeah. I agree, there is no surprise why she is quiet about her death. I'm happy that you liked the way she described it. And to have you almost feeling again... what more could this story achieve, really?


I imagine getting stuck outside the Ravenclaw common room because you can't answer the riddle is a rite of passage for all Ravenclaws. Are you really a Ravenclaw if this hasn't happened to you?


Thanks for floating by, Gwennan! I really appreciate you taking the time out of your busy afterlife to do so

Name: AltraX (Signed) · Date: 27 Jun 2017 06:12 PM · starstarstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Story:Burned by Ice Chapter: Frostbite

Hiya! I’ve been on a big of a Founder’s Era kick today and this story fit the bill!


This was an interesting read. I’ve read a couple of stories about Helena and each one has highlighted her character in a different way. Not saying any one way is better than another, but here, she’s almost a little bitter about how life has worked for her. Like, I don’t know why that’s the feel I get from this chapter, but it just…there’s definite anger and unease and I’m trying really hard to remember her character’s backstory because maybe that’s where I’m getting the feelings from…


Regardless, I love how her last thoughts are stuck on the riddle to the Ravenclaw common room, and how the riddle really didn’t have a wrong answer. It was just a bit more ironic for her, in the end. I love all the names she calls the door knocker and how she regrets her choice of saying death by fire was her choice. I’m not quite sure the ice would have treated her much fairly, but the fire and the intensity I think definitely set the stage for her character here. And she actually says it herself, how fire is all she’s known and how she felt at constant competition with her mother.


I really enjoyed how you weaved this chapter together and how all the pieces came together. I appreciate the opportunity to see Helena in a different light, and catch a moment that sparks me into learning more about her character. Fantastic!


-Mikaela xx

Author's Response:

Heya! Thanks for dropping in.


Yes, Helena is quite bitter and angry here. I wanted to write a sassy Helena, and this is what happened! She's also a bit petty, yet still very dramatic. It didn't really matter which death she chose from the Robert Frost poem - she was going to be dramatic about it either way.


Thanks for the review, Mikaela :)

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