Gorgeous Banner by mockingjay@TDA | A gift for the lovely beyond the rain
for·tu·i·tous- fôr too …™ d…™s/
happening by accident or chance, rather than design
Hi, I'm here to review for the Magical Menegerie 2019 (Gotta Catch them all, y'know. According to Deana that is!)
I love that you picked this one for a podfic. As a Snapione shipper myself, I'm always happy to read a well written one that keeps them both in character. They're both strong will characters to begin with, smart as well as intelligent.
It's just their age difference that can be a bit squiggy, but this Hermione seems old enough to pass by that squiggy (grey) area. I love that she was willing to go to him, even if she wasn't sure he would be happy to see her. Since this is the prologue, I'm not sure what is going on and why she would have questions. But it written beautifully enough that it's sucking me into continuing on.
That is the mark of true writer, and you have it, dear Meg.
I never knew that Hermione was a Peeping Tom (or Thomasina, in this cause) but it shows us the depth of her feeling for him, her Severus.
All in all, I love the beginning of this story in how well you set the descriptions. I look forward to the rest.
Written for Frankie05 for Slytherinchica08's Gift It Challenge|Amazing banner by darth vader@tda
"I had to do it. At least once."
Hey, Meg, here for EvS review battle in the common room!
I'm a sucker for Draco and Hermione fics. I've always thought she could do better than Ron Weasley. (Nothing wrong with Ron, they're just not the right 'fit' to me. Neither is Harry and Ginny, but that's an entirely different story, there. I know people who are just blessed canon shippers, and refuse to see a different track - so glad to see you on the other side.)
Anyhow, I loved this! I could sit and type that over and over, but, that's just fangirling, right? I loved how you stuck to both their canon selves, but still worked in that KISS. Yup, it was perfect.
Just as her ending reaction was, the slap. Yup, I agree with Malfoy, it was definitely worth it. Even if they had to step back to their normal relationship - I could see an understanding between them.
Gives me a little hope for the insufferable git.
I'm glad I picked this fic to review, it was awesome. For a first Dramione, it deserves a high five.
A family Christmas lunch at the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black.
Just as fabulous as the first (or, actually the second, as this one was the first.)
Baby Tonks made me smile with Narcissa and Andromeda just being regular sisters in that moment. I enjoyed their closeness. There was always something to me about Narcissa and how she wasn't as bigoted as the other Blacks towards Muggleborns. (I've even written her that way, so it was heartening to see it in your story, too.)
Thanks for the great read!
Aww, thank you so much! I'm so happy you decided to check out this one as well! :)
Baby Tonks is just adorable, isn't she? And yes, I agree that Narcissa wasn't as bigoted as the rest of the family... or at least, I've always thought that she valued family bonds more than she valued Pureblood ideology and that she would still feel affection for her sister, despite her marrying someone "unworthy".
Glad you enjoyed this too! Thank you for another lovely review!
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Hermione whispered softly, 'Confundus.'
Hey, Meg, back again for the EvS review battle!
<i>Confundus</i>. I really, for some reason, before I began reading, expected this to be directed at Ron. Why? He's an insufferabe git, of course.
But, then, I saw the name <i>Cormac</i> and almost, well, lost my lunch. If there was ever a person in the HP universe I disliked more than good ole Umbridge, it would be Cormac. You described perfectly how slimy he and just how he makes <i>me</i> feel in Hermione's own reaction.
I love how you've written her. She (and our beloved Snape) are my favorite characters and you've kept her <i>in</i> character so beautifully. You have a great way of drawing your readers in with your words, dear.
This was fantastic, and even made me feel for Ron.
“When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace” – Jimi Hendrix
Peter struggles with a life-changing decision.
[2014 Keckers Runner-up for Best Villain]
Hey, here for review tag!
I chose this story because it was about Peter. (Not because I'm hooked on Peter, but because I've written two one shots with him in it for fic exchanges with friends.)
Peter is always the forgotten Marauder. Kind of the last to picked to a team. His courage pretty much came from his friends and having them around him. You've shown us a side of him without his friends to protect him, and it's pretty ugly. ALL of his other friends would have died for him. He even knows that, but still... he just excuses away why he's doing it.
I've never been much of a fan of James Potter because of the way he bullied Snape in school. That Lily picked him over her longer friendship with Snape has always bothered me. Things could have/ would have been far different if she had. (That's not part of your story, I know! It just led up to what happeed here!)
I think you've captured Peter well, here. Always the follower. Picking the wrong person to follow. If only he had told someone in the Order what was going on! But truly, if faced with Voldemort like he'd been, how many of us would have pee'd our pants and done the same?
But there are so many 'What ifs' that could have changed the outcomes of everyone, that Harry Potter and the series wouldn't have existed!
Thank you for your story, it was GREAT.
Right on! Peter is a really interesting character, and I wrote this story because I didn't like him, haha. And because, as you said, he IS the 'forgotten' Marauder and his story doesn't really get told, especially not at the time I wrote this. These days there seem to be a lot more Peter fics which is awesome. I mean, as a character he's fascinating, and things COULD have been so different if he'd chosen differently, but this decision alone is like the most awful thing anyone could possibly do to their friends.
I do think you're right in that Peter's courage was from his friends. I think he wanted to be as brave and selfless as they were, and admired that about them, but when it came down to it he just couldn't be. And I almost feel a little bad for him about that.
I'm sure Snape also saw it as terribly unfair that Lily picked James over him, with their longstanding friendship probably making him even more bitter about it. But James changed in a positive way, whereas Snape didn't. And yeah I know this is off topic, but worthy of discussion! Now I'm wondering if there's a James Potter discussion thread on the forums. But anyway. /tangent
Thank you, I'm happy to hear that the story captures Peter well. And I think your point about how what Peter did compares to what any normal person would do in the situation is really important. Everyone else in the Order is commended for their bravery, and like, all the 'good guys' are that selfless, but the reality is that not everyone is like that, and I think Peter's hesitance and fear of dying is far more realistic for the average person. Not that that makes his ultimate decision right. But at least I think he is more understandable.
The what-ifs are one of my favorite thigns about fanfiction. It really could have been so different!
Thanks so much for you r review, and I'm really glad you enjoyed the story! <3
Barty Crouch Jr: fearsome Death Eater, Auror impersonator, and aspiring chef.
The story of why it took Barty an entire book to get around to killing Harry Potter.
Happy birthday!! I'm here to offer you a present in the way of a review!
This story was hilarious. I loved the bit about the cooking shows. (Why I picked it, because I've been binge watching Gordon Ramsey for the past few months. LOL) It was charmingly AU, as well as a good excuse as to why he never got around to doing his part of the task and getting rewarded by the Dark Lord himself! Possibly, and it's a huge 'if' of a possibility, Voldemort could awarded him with his own show if he'd actually completed his job.
I'll be honest, through out the whole movie/book, I never realized that there was anything wrong with Moody. I did find him sort of scary when he first appeared in the Great Hall, but for all of overshadowing JKR threw in, I never got it.
Again, the happiest of birthdays, and keep writing your lovely stories!
Omg! Thank you so much! This was such a wonderful surprise.
Ha, this is one of the weirdest things I've ever written XD I'm so happy that you enjoyed it! And found that it sorta made sense to explain why he took so long. Like... It COULD have happened this way. Guess we'll never know. :p And now I'm wishing he had been successful because I would love to see voldemort hand out cooking shows as rewards ahaha. Thanks so much for your review!
Sirius teaches Regulus something about prejudice
Wow, what can I say? This was adorable, light-hearted and again showed family dynamics that you didn't get to see in the books written by JKR. I know it would have been rediculously hard for her to flesh out of her characters, but poor Regulus was basically just a set of initials and a little brother label in the books. It would have helped flesh out poor Sirius also.
Sirius is right, y'know? Not all werewolves are bad. But just like anyone else, there's good, bad and 'grey' people/creatures. Everyone should be judged on their own merits - whether they be werewolf, muggleborn, haflblood, vampire or pureblood. The fight between Sirius and his father show just how bad pre-judging people can be. Leads to prejudice and bigotry. (What's going on right now in the world is evidence, too, of just that.)
Once it's learned and it takes hold, it's hard to wash away. Hard to change the views of someone who doesn't want to be changed, so I'm glad to see that little seed planted by Sirius. It's possibly what helped spur Regulus on later to rebel from the Black family values and Voldemort.
Thank you for reviewing this, too! :)
I think I told you already, but I really love the sibling relationship between Sirius and Regulus. Yes, I agree that Regulus didn't have much development in the books, but JK did give us just enough to imagine what kind of person he might be, and he's such a tragic and fascinating character.
Yes, exactly, there's good and bad among werewolves just like there's good and bad among "normal" people. Just like there's good and bad among all kind of creatures... which is what the whole Harry Potter saga is about, after all, isn't it? And yes, unfortunately the world seem to go in the exact opposite direction at the moment... :( How is politics so bad everywhere? But let's not get into it...
Yes, prejudice is hard to overcome... and yes, I do like to think that Sirius' story helped Regulus build a bit of critical sense and maybe make him doubt, and eventually rebel, later.
Thank you so much for another lovely review!
Sometimes thigs don't work how you would expect...
Written for 2015 House Cup on HPFF
A lovely story of brotherly love. I can't say how much I enjoyed it. I'm not used of reading in 'you', but I did catch on that it was Albus - or I was Albus? I haven't read much of the next generation, so that is why I picked it.
It was cute, the lack of flobberworm race. Possibly should have picked bowtruckles that the younger cousins went in search of. Fantastic Beasts (the movie) gave me a love for those little, animated sticks, so I too, would have gone with Hugo and Lily to look for them.
I loved the family dynamics shown at the end. Harry so easy to allow the mischief his sons got into, Ginny having to play the heavy in the punishment, and the implusable story given for why they had a bit of dirt on their pants. In that. it looks James takes after his reporter-mother's instinct for writing.
Great job, and I look forward with anticipation on the next story I read <3
Hey, Juls! :)
I'm glad you enjoyed this little story. :) I honestly love writing in second person a lot, even if it usually works better with angst... I used it here only because it accentuated the suspance at the beginning... I wanted to trick the reader in believing something would actually happen... :P And yes, I guess you were Albus, in a way... :P I don't read or write next gen much either, but for this piece I thought the Wotter clan would just work so well...
I think I would've enjoyed going after bowtruckles better, too. ;) And yes, I get what you mean... Pickett was just so cute, wasn't he?
Ahahah! I think Harry would be just too amused by his children's mischief, while Ginny would be very much like Molly. :D And yes, James does have a fervent imagination... maybe he will be a writer one day, who knows? :)
Thank you so much for the lovely review and the swap!
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Rue has left home to 'play a game', and her sister misses her. Nights have become darker in her absence- she just wants her to come back.
A Hunger Games story
Hey there! Here for review tag!
I picked this story because A) it wasn't Harry Potter, and B) because it was for the Hunger Games. I haven't read any fanfiction for the Hunger Games before and Rue was one of my favorite characters in the books and the movies.
I had the chance to read all three books before I went to see the movie. (Jammed that session in about four days. It was sad and fantastic at the same time.) When Rue showed up in the books, I thought she had a good chance because she was so crafty, and her hiding skills were pretty good. Unfortunately, she didn't survive (like so many of the other innocent characters.)
The scene where Katniss lays the flowers around her and sang was very poignant, and I'm sure if your Rosie had been able to see that, it would have helped her through the morning period. I feel for Rosie and her parents, because they (the parents) know that sooner or later, Rosie and their other children will have to go through that 'reapy' thing. If they get chosen, and there always is a good possible of that, your significance of the candle (lit then unlit) will happen once more.
You managed to write a fabulous story, my dear. It's a perfect companion to the first novel/movie, and we get to see a side of the story that wasn't shown.
I feel for poor Rosie.
I loved Rue, she was also my favourite character- I remember having to put the book down reading that Marvel threw his spear because it was so sudden and ugh, SO SAD. I agree with you on Katniss singing for her and laying the flowers; it was very touching and also, I think, really emphasised how special the relationship they had was, because I don’t imagine she would have done exactly the same for anyone else, save Prim.
Thanks for the lovely review <3
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Destiny is the result of people's choices. And any single choice can change it completely.
In this AU the Marauders are still alive and free (more or less...), Neville Longbottom is the guy with the scar, and Harry... Well, just read and find out!
Golden Chalices 2018 winner: best dialogue
Back for another review swap!
Gotta love a great Quidditch Match, and a great save by Jimmy with Neville. It had to have been scary to fall like that, and just as scary to watch your friend fall also. But, Snape did save the day along with Jimmy, so all is good.
I'm glad that Jimmy was able to get Ron to accept (if not willingly) Neville being a part of the team. That Snape see a shade of Marauder by the sight them huddled together I guess should be expected. Maybe he'll figure it out soon? Being a Snape fan myself, I can't wait to see that bit unfold.
Poor Lily! Nightmares are never a good thing, unsettling even. That she worries that she'll lose her daughter like her son is saddening. Wish I could say her fears weren't to be expected, but the Dark Lord approaches somewhere in the story. Eventually, down the road.
I'm glad that Jimmy and Peter made up. As the only father Jimmy knows, he needs him. I'm also glad that Peter is feeling guilt over taking Jimmy. Though we all know what happened to Jimmy's real parents if he'd stayed with them, it just feel right that Jimmy doesn't know who his real parents are. (Even if he did get the bonus of not having to live with the Dursleys.)
I feel for Neville also, because his parents died the way Harry's had in the original storyline. But, isn't death better than wasting away in the long term ward in St Mungo's anyhow?
Okay - on to the next chapter.
Back for part two of the review swap! (Thanks so much for doing this with me.)
I like the dynamics of this chapter. How Harry meets his long lost son without realizing who he is. How's he built a 'friendship' with Peter enough to mention it to Jimmy. One day soon I think that whole can of worms is going to burst open and splatter them all. The fall out is going to be marvelous. Really. I hope. Oh, Merlin... it's going to be just a mess.
That Jimmy is figuring it out from what the Sorting Hat said during his sorting makes him one smart cookie. Well - Harry was more inpulsive and reactive, so will he allow himself time to think it before he goes off, storming what ever castle is in his way?
I love the meeting between Dumbledore and James. I'm 99 percent sure that Dumbledore knows exactly who Jimmy is and still keeping it a secret. For now, at least.
AND - OH MY MERLIN - Snape and James. The stuff of fantasies. I love the fact that Auror James finally apologied to Professor Severus. I'm pretty sure he meant it too. Too much to hope thay could become (if not friends) acquaintances? Too much dreaming, I guess...
Anyhow - absolutely fabulous chapter.
Oh, my! (I've decided to read a couple of chapters before doing a review. I'm here for a bit of review tag, my dear!)
How, just how could you put poor Neville in Slytherin? Poor bloke is not going to catch any breaks there, and it seems like Draco Malfoy is the same, nasty as can be. But, I have a feeling I'll figure out what's up with Neville being in Slytherin eventually.
As for the Sorting Hat, poor thing also. I have a feeling Jimmy there wants to burn it in a pyre for revealing his paternity to him. But, I'm glad to see, (unlike poor Neville) he, at least, as some back up with the Weasley twins and Ron being his friends.
I like the flip on Neville being the boy who lived this go around. I've always thought that there was just a hair between them on who got to receive that title. Both were equally eligible for it. That Lestrange went for the Longbottoms and Voldemort for the Potters could have easily gone the other way.
AND - what happened in Deathly Hallows certainly supports that, for Neville is the one that took out the last Horcrux. So, maybe in a way, they were both, together, the answer to the prophesy?
I love Snape, and it looks like he's going to give them all hell for the next few years. I'm looking forward into reading some more of this story.
Hey, Juls! :)
Ah, I'm so glad you've decided to check Jimmy out, and that you've read a few chapters already! This is my current main focus and I'm always glad when people stop by! <3
Yes, I know... poor, little Neville... but it is kind of fitting with some traits of his personality in this universe... and there is that little bit of Voldemort's soul to consider... he wouldn't fight half as hard as Harry did in canon to be put somewhere else, so... but yes, he's going to have a hard time fitting in... :(
Ahahah! Jimmy probably would want to burn it... :P He does have a great support net, at least. In that aspect he's quite lucky. :)
Yes, it could've easily been Neville instead of Harry and I think it can be interesting to see how everything would have worked out if it had been the other way. As for them both being the answer to the prophecy... I see your point about DH, but I think ultimately it was Harry in canon (I mean, multiple people destroyed the Horcruxes, and yes, Neville's actions in DH were heroic, but it's Harry's sacrifice that ultimately defeated Voldemort... if you know what I mean? Anyway...)
I'm not the biggest fan of Snape, but I do have fun writing him in this story. Yes, he's going to give the hell, but I guess the opposite is true, too, so I can't completely blame him... :P
Thank you so much for this great review! :D
More secrets revealed!
So, anyhow, I liked this chapter. I'm still confused (and, yeah, I am supposed to be still!) about what actually happened. The bits and pieces are still unfolding, ever so slowly.
I was amazed to see James still alive, and Sirius out and about and NOT in Azkaban. I know the answers are coming on that... so, we shall be patient. One major question is - is Lily still alive and this Dor's mother? (I suspect not, but you've been surprising me as we go!) Or, who did James marry after and is mum to this Dor? Again... patience. *smiles*
Okay! Next chapter to hopefully get a few answers!
Hey, Juls! :)
Yes, I do reveal a lot in this chapter. ;)
I'm glad I surprised you with James and Sirius here. Obviously, there is a reason for everything. As for Lily and Dor... yes, you'll have to read on and find out. ;)
Thank you for the review! :)
Narnia is one of my favorite places also!
In a way, Canon Neville was pretty much an orphan also, with his parents sufferring under the curse that Bellatrix and the other Death Eaters inflicted on the elder Longbottoms. That just one of the other ways that makes me think that both Neville and Harry were the prophesied ones of Trelawny's prophesy (and that is why Dumbledore did his best to make sure no one knew EXACTLY what was in it.
It's nice to see that even with things out sorts between Jimmy and Neville, Neville still went out of his way to try and warn him (that would be the Gryffindor in him.)
Also, Ron's warming up to Neville? Good deal.
Hi again! :)
I really enjoyed Narnia, we are together in this. :)
Yes, canon Neville is sort of an orphan, too... his canon backstory is actually so sad... :(
Neville has a pretty strong Gryffindor side... and he does care for Jimmy deeply, even if he disagrees with him on many things (or on one thing... either way...)
And yes, Ron is warming up to Neville, too. ;)
Thank you for another lovely review, dear!
Hey there! I'm back, this time review for the Magical Menegerie 2019.
So the Portmans are going to move just down the road from the Potters. AND in the house that the Dumbledores used to live in. That's a cool twist! I wonder if the house is haunted like everyone thinks it is?
Well, is it? I guess I'll be finding out shortly. Right?
I have to ask, did Peter kidnap Harry so he could have a kid or to keep him safe? That is my ongoing question. Selfish or heroic? I hope heroic, but with Pettigrew one can never tell.
And - Dorea. Harry has a little sister and Peter robbed her of having a big brother and robbed him of having a little sister. Robbed Lily and James of having a complete family. That more than kinda sucks right there.
Just one total grammer comment here - the word you're using, foul, should actually be fool. (The English language can be nutters at times for look-a-like words.)
Again - another lovely chapter! <3juls
I'm here (a wee bit late!) for our review swap! Continuing on where I left off.
Oh that dang troll! But, it did bring them all together in the books and now in your story. Knowing how it got in there in the books, it's still scary. That they went to save know it all Hermione even though they really didn't like her speaks volumes to their Gryffindor courage (or blind stupidity!) but hey, they all lived, and that was one of the important things.
They're getting closer to figuring out how to save the day. I can't wait until then - and I have too many chapters to read and review to get there. I love your story, it's amazing.
What if Peter Pettigrew hadn't escaped at the end of Prisoner of Azkaban?
Here for the EvS review battle!!
This was brill, Rumpels! I could very well see this as the outcome myself if Peter had been caught. Sad for Sirius, Remus, Tonks and Fred (Cedric and many others, too!) that it hadn't. Without the rat's escape, there'd been no reason - at least for now - for anyone to die. JKR did them all an injustice!
Not for us, the readers, though. It's terrible to know that all that misfortune only happened because a rat escaped and set the dominoes tumbling.
I also wonder though, eventually Voldemort would have popped up somehow. Evil can never be contained for long. Out of order, could he possibly have won though? Something we won't ever know, but still, the question lingers.
I've always felt Sirius had been the most cheated of all those effected. His whole adult life had been spent under the abysmal effects of the Dementors. He was thought of as being the one to betray his friends, and he didn't even have Remus to back him up.
Then - he was only free for a short time before his death to be with Harry and mentor him.
So much cloud have been better in our favorites' lives if JKR hadn't been so mean and let that little rat live.
I'm happy you wrote this story, perhaps a wee bit disgruntled that it couldn't have happened this way.
I blame JKR.
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Draco makes a new friend in the Forbidden Forest.
I am in awe. This was beautifully written. I've always thought the same about Draco. Yes, he was a prat, a bully, a jerk, a bigot. But he wasn't really Death Eater material once he came to it. All the adolation he'd felt for Voldemort, all his desire to be just like dear old dad to get dear old's approval didn't quite make him the big, baddy everyone thought he was.
His reasons for actually becoming a Death Eater shows the fact that family meant everything to him - more than the name Malfoy. For the very act he would perform to save his family would blacken his name in the end.
You surprised me with the Thestral also. I was expecting Firenze. The Thestral worked wonderfully though. The reason you can see a Threstral is what people fear the most - death of others. Death is a natural part of life though, so, the sight of the Thestral should be comforting. From when Harry and Luna saw them together, they are beautiful, magestic creatures. I doubt Hogwarts would use them to transport students if they were dangerous.
(Sorry for meandering). Your story shows the natural progression in Draco to the change we finally saw at the end of 'Deathly Hallows'. It wasn't an abrupt change, and it was wonderful to see it written out. He wasn't perfect, just misunderstood.
Aww, thank you so much for this lovely review! It's not my best story but I'll always have an affinity for Draco and really enjoyed writing him with the thestral. I don't think he really wanted to become a Death Eater, I think he was absolutely terrified of the Dark Lord. And I thought it'd be really interesting to write a nice scene with him and a magical creature, and in this moment, I think he's a lot like the thestral.
Anyone who has lived in an apartment probably has a horror story and if they don't they know someone who does have one. This is mine.
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Oh, geeze!But Anyhow - I'm here to do a review for the Menagerie Round 2.
I've actually felt the same way a few times, with fighting neighbors and all. It's crazy how thin walls can be when the vitriolic sounds of significant others' shoutings from another dwelling.
Domestic abuse has got to be the worst thing to hear from the other side of a wall. Do you call the police? Do you go next door and bang on it? (Please don't, that can get you killed!) Do you just roll over and ignore it? Personal choices there, I know.. (Police aren't going to do much if there's A) nothing physical to show for it and B) no charges are pressed, that'll be dropped the next day. It's a cycle.)
This was well written, I thought she'd actually killed him. Got that queasy feeling in my stomach and the thump, thump, thump. I was like - did she? Just like your character. For some odd reason, I kept thinking that if something bad had happened, somehow the cat would have freaked out and possibly clued you in. (Too much DR Doolittle? Maybe...)
I was never so happy when those type of neighbors moved out. AND - we've been lucky so far that in the past year, it's been blissfully, idyllically peaceful.
I don't know which is scarier.
Good job at keeping me in suspense!
Thanks for such a lovely review. I have always felt very on the fence about this story - I always question if it came out as well as it could have. You are right that tere are a lot of questions involved in this situation and I asked myself every single one of them. If the arguing happened at night it would have been easy to just call the office and report a disturbance of the peace but this was in the middle of the day which put me in a more difficult bind. Yeah, I am talking about this situation as if I lived through it becuase I did. There were some minor creative liberties taken such as the conversation between the MC and Miss Charming, that happened long after the whole fear she killed Mr. Charming and I don't think I managed a good final quip (too tired) Also the silence in real life lasted a whole lot longer.
As for kitty reaction, I think they had gotten used to the fighting almost as much as I had. Still it was a terrifying situation to be in and I am very happy to say the Charmings moved out and I am currently with nice quiet neighbors who do nothing more than make their floor, my celing creak from time to time. It is a wonderful change of pace that makes me quite happy.
Glad you enjoyed the read!
"Have no fear, Quinn Jones."
Apparently, it is a truth universally acknowledged that I, Quinn Jones, a full-fledged Gryffindor, am actually afraid of three little words.
What a load of nonsense.
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Hey, Kris, checking in for the EvS review challenge!!
So, yeah, as promised I'm here to read (and review) your story. I'm pretty sure I began reading it right after I read 'No Mercy' but I didn't leave any reviews - which means, review time. Now, to the meat of the review...
This is pretty awesome, and I love how you you've written the friendship dynamics between Quinn and James. (It does suck to be Albus in this venue, but HEY all's fair in love and war!) I don't know if it's going to get romantic or not, but it's lovely to see a close friendship between them. I'd say sibling-ish, but I don't want it to get icky later.
I love Grandpa. Seriously, he's a natural at the parenting thing since her own parents really aren't because they're focused ob their jobs and teams. I honestly think they're going to regret it later on when they realize just how much of their children's lives they missed.
Poor Ethan - I now know what happened and why he's so bloody and drunk when he arrives home after the summons because I've read 'No Mercy'. It was a great tie in, and I do appreciate that you added that to the mix.
(I'm kind of bouncing from here to there, sorry!)
The broom is pretty awesome, if you asked me. Since Quinn comes from a family of Quidditch players, it does make perfect sense that she's just as devoted to the sport as her parents. Having her Granddad train her, that's like a dream come true. (He reminds me of my own boyfriend with the grandkids. Great characterization there.
I will be back for more, I assure you!
hey juls :)
i just really love the whole friends-to-lovers thing - for me it's probably the best type of relationship, falling in love with your best friend and having them reciprocate those feelings. it's like it can't get any better than that, you know?
i love writing about ian/quinnðan's grandad - he's one of my favourite characters even if he's a minor character, i just think that he's aware of how lousy their parents (his son and his daughter-in-law) are as parents so he tries to make up for it. but he can't quite escape his blunt persona so hahha he kinda managed to balance things out, i hope.
thanks for the lovely review :)
Back again for EvS review battle!
Got to say, Kris, this is an extremely interesting story. I'm loving learning about Quidditch here. I saw the words 'Sloth Grip Roll' and I bounced up and down in my seat because we'd learned that move in the Hogwarts A Mystery Game. I never really got much of a chance to play Quidditch on any the RP forums I was on, so this was a great chapter to read on it.
It was also really long... so let's get this review rolling...
I'm sensing more and more that James is interested in Quinn in more than a BFF situation. Yes, he's upset about Albus being hurt over the break up, and possibly being more hurt if he hooked up with Quinn after all this. The girl, though, is oblivious to the infatuation. I wonder what it's going to take for eyes to be opened? A bludger to the cranium? Possibly.
If they do end up in a relation, or a long lasting relationship, they have the best of beginnings - a longstanding friendship.
Quinn's grandad makes a great coach. He's not lenient on any of them. He doesn't take into consideration that a) Quinn's his granddaughter or b) she's a girl. She doesn't ask for that either. Glad he didn't let her 'give in' and walk off, so much of that happens nowadays.
This though, was the highlight of the chapter:
I noticed Ziggy on the roof. He looked like he just ate a bird or something. Oh, yeah, there it is. He coughed and a white feather flew out of his mouth. How nice.
Yeah, I'm a succker for sarcastic, cat humor.
Great chapter - looking forward to reading more.
lol juls i literally laughed out loud at your 'bludger to the cranium' comment HAHAH it just seems like something that drastic would be needed for quinn to stop being so oblivious (or maybe in denial? or maybe a combination of both?) and realise she's in love with james (and that he is in love with her).
i agree about them having the best possible foundation/beginning to their relationship - a friendship, though it may be something that they don't want to ruin....
oh yeah, quinn's grandad would never let her just whine and give up and walk away - he's just not like that and quinn sometimes goes a bit overdramatic and needs people to yell at her or something to get her back to her senses :P
ah, ziggy - people's favourite TAOBN character :) i really love writing about him - i can jsut show all my love for cats when mentioning ziggy in the story hahah
thanks for the review!
Hey, there, it's me doing a review for the March EvS review battle. Go Team Emerald. Got to love that shade, am I right?
I love Ziggy and Odin. Their frenemy relationship is something to behold. Kind of like siblings. The 'I can mess with you, but no one else can'. I've watch my cats do the treat steal thing, and you sure have got that right.
So, bribery works once again. Lucky Odin that Quinn was in a bribing mood. It helped that she needed to get a hold of James 'right then'. I don't even think she realizes her own feelings for the oldest Potter boy, but I think James has an idea on it. Has he slways had feelings like that for her, I wonder?
Hopefully Quinn wakes up on that soon. He seems like a keeper.
I love how you've wriiten the friendship dynamics between all of the cousins and Quinn. They're an amazingly huge bunch of characters, and you've managed to give them all a distinctive style and personality of their own. I feel for Albus, truly, but I can even tell that when cuts you off - it's off. I found it cute that she was jealous of James dancing with some one else.
I feel for James at the end. I truly do.
All in all, this story is shaping up to be fantastic. You've handled all of the multiple characters very well when needed. I can't wait to read further on and figure out what's up with Dom and her stalking of her sister's boyfriend, Teddy.
(Who doesn't love Teddy, right?)
Hey there, Kris, it's me! Back for the EvS review battle (and Team Emerald!)
So anyhow, I didn't like this chapter. I loved it. The dynamics again between your characters is spot on. They seem comfortable together and not stilted or off setting. Which shows how great of a writer you are.
So - James finally told Quinn how he felt, but did a quick back track to cover it up. BAD James, but he's probably right, it's still too early for to accept the truth. But, it was something she needed to hear from <i>someone</i>. I definately am NOT a fan of her parents. I love her grandpa, even with all his faults, because he does care.
Ethan though, poor dude. (I've finally caught up to the bits of the one shots I read make sense now.) He's had the same upbringing as Quinn, and he's emotionally suffered for it too. I hope they have some sort of support programs for Hit Wizards' burn out in place. Seriously.
Anyhow - that broom race was pretty thrilling. I do wish broom riding was a real thing. I mean, come on, it's been rumored for <i>centuries</i> that witches and wizards could ride brooms. Why can't <i>one</i> thing about them be true? Right?
James... poor James... I'm betting his heart was up his throat and almost out. Glad he's got a quick wand, and that he saved her. It would have been tragic to end the story here.
On the ending note of my review, James is showing off his feelings again, and I'm seeing a bit of relization from Quinn. Good job on the slow burning of their relationship, Kris!!
Hey, Kris, back for the EvS battle and the epic team emerald!
I like how you continued on with the aftermath of the almost accident. Allowing them to continue to work through their emotions. Got to feel for poor James in this situation. The girl you love almost smooshes herself into a pancake on a stick, but you have to act. Adreneline surging through.
I just want to say, Quinn's parents are CRAP. I'm sure they must love their kids, but EVERYTHING is placed before them. Do they not realize what they're losing by ignoring them? I feel for Grandad though, he is too old to be caretaker for these crazy kids.
But grandad seems to be involved in some stuff anyhow. Was he some sort of spy or hit wizard or something? I smell a bit of mafia (wizarding style, of course!) here.
I love the fact that their trying to hide the fact Lily is snogging/shagging Scorpius from her brother. Poor Scorpius should it be discovered before James is told. At least Albus' friendship should count for something in this matter, right? Possibly...
Anyhow, you have a fabulous chapter here! Can't wait to read more.
Hey, back for more EvS fun. Go team Emerald!
I will agree, Quinn's ego is horrible. She needs to actually let Albus go, if that's her intention. If she hurts him too much, I doubt James will be happy.
I admire your skill at writing Quidditch. I've never truly been a sports fan, myself. Sure, I follow a few of the American Football teams. Cheer for them, play something called Fantasy Football (where you compete with teams made up of real players from the real teams. It's fun, but my I introduced my boyfriend to it - and he's turned into a monster at it.) So - as I said, you're great at writing Quidditch. Gave me a much better understanding of it. Even if this was just a tryout for the team.
I love your little Lily. She's a dynamo. Can't wait to see more Quidditch games with her in it.
And - you surprised me with a Nott in Gryffindor. I was just as 'blinky' eyed as Quinn over it. Seems times are truly changing. For the good, at least. Thankfully. Glad to see her make the team - and not end up breaking every bone in her body. Quinn's directions were truly evil, by the way.
Lysander. I'll admit I have a certain weakness for that name. Everytime I see it, it reminds me of former RP character with that name. (Since I created him back before DH came out, he was NOT named after the JKR character twins. Thankfully. One day, he and his vampire uncle, Leander will show up in a story!)
I now feel for Jax Wood. His parents suck just as much as Quinn's. Hopefully you have something good planned for him in future chapters. He truly sounds like he could be interesting character.
Anyhow - I wish I could give this chapter more than a 10. Simply for all the amazing Quidditch stuff.