Hi, I'm Emma! 24, Australian, I specialise in writing all your faves as queer and Jewish. Talk to me about how many terrible worldbuilding decisions JKR made. Happy to chat any time!
If you would like my non-HP fic, it's over at dropbear. I'm facingthenorthwind over on the forums, a Ravenclaw prefect. :D
Just where did James Potter get that stupid Snitch anyway?
Lovely banner by brokenbones*@TDA!
oh my gooooodness, I know this has nothing to do with the story but golly that banner is gorgeous. It makes me think I should go request/rerequest some banners myself.
I absolutely love a Lily who is good at Quidditch!!! I think that's a new headcanon that I am going to adopt and lovingly raise before sending it off to university. I can't see her being on the Quidditch team given it would give too many opportunities for James to harass her (and while, obviously, it's James who should be kicked off the team in that situation, we know that he keeps playing Quidditch, so....wait, I'm acting like it's canon that she left the Quidditch team, why am I like this, ignore me). I can extremely see her being good at it but only as a casual thing probably specifically because of James.
The commentary was such an effective way to set the scene and show us the odds they're up against without seeming like it's "As you know, my wife whom I've been married to for ten years, our seven-year-old son is asleep upstairs..." type exposition. I'm angry at the compulsory heterosexuality that would make a post-game hug into something of speculation. >:(
My only complaint is that the jump from "eugh, I am barely tolerating you" to "proposal" seems quite sudden? But I'm not sure how to fix that, so feel free to disregard that entirely.
We were meant to be friends, Remus. You know it, as well as I do.
Two children who grew up together. Two boys struggling on their paths towards adulthood. Two men faced with darkness too thick for them to get through.
A Peter/Remus story.
Set in the All the truth about Jimmy Portman's universe.
Hufflepuff Story of the Month - November 2016
Sitewide Story of the Month - January 2017
Golden Chalices Awards 2017 Runner Up - Best Drama
Golden Chalices Awards 2017 Winner - Best Minor Canon Character
FROGS 2017 Nomination - Best Marauders Era
FROGS 2017 Nomination - Best Minor Canon Character
FROGS 2018 Winner - Best Minor Canon Character
Beta'ed by Ysh (princesslily_36/Flaming Quilltips), with some help from Bianca (victoria_anne). Stunning banner by Kristin (Stella Blue). Love you, girls!
pete freezing up in battle is very good, I love it. and sirius being angry! and remus defending him! it's all so perfect!!! I like it even more that it was a surprise, and Sirius was able to rise to it and Peter not; because Sirius can roll with the punches but Peter needs the stability of having friends who can protect him specifically so he doesn't have to roll with the punches.
the way leander is becoming a fash just by Following Orders is also very good. because remus doesn't have any right to privacy!!! he's dirty werewolf scum!!!!
remus ohhh my god are you going to break things off because you don't want to give your partner the chance to make their own decision about how much danger they want to be put in by association with you, you SURE ARE aren't you bud, why are you so predictably the wooooorst
I Love Mary Macdonald. I'll fight anyone who hurts her. I love her friendship with Peter!!! I love that she danced with him and they had FUN for once. I'm so glad any time these poor children have fun.
" For a moment, she felt a point of guilt at the thought that she would bring a new life in such a dark and battered world." wooooooof, Lily, this hurt a looot. But it's so good -- and such a real dilemma.
And oh no. that voice. Is it Yaxley???
This was a delightful chapter! I love how well-paced this story is, there are so many things going on and yet it never feels rushed or like you've got too many balls in the air at once. Peter's.....downward slide, I guess, is really skillfully done too -- just as Remus is pulling away and acting real suspicious to the Marauders (i'm SO glad in this universe he has Dorcas in the know, though! at least he can have one good thing). Peter is also becoming pricklier. You have this really wonderful skill in showing how it's a slow deterioration for both Remus and Peter -- how the war/existing while werewolf is wearing them down. I cannot believe I only have two chapters to go, oh nooooo. what if i stopped here and everyone was happy(ish) and no one had betrayed anyone and no one was dead?
I think that's how it would go, with Peter panicking, and Sirius getting angry, and Remus trying to defend Peter. Can't you see it going exactly like that? Poor Pete, even though he should have known better and not joined the Order in the first place...
Ah, Leander... he's doing what he thinks is best... but yes, he's being quite awful about the whole thing, there's no reason for him to treat Remus that way...
And well, this is Remus, so of course he's doing that. Fortunately, Dorcas is not going to just surrender.
Mary is precious, isn't she? So glad you liked that little bonding moment between her and Peter. :)
Yeah, it is a real dilemma... poor Lily... :(
Not going to answer that one, you already know the answer anyway...
I'm so glad you liked this chapter and the progression of the story and of Peter and Remus' characters so far. Thank you so, so much again for all the lovely reviews, I'm going to reply to the last ones soon (right now I need to take a break because I need food and my pc needs charge...)
I'm surprised Peter folded so quickly? Or rather I guess I'm surprised he started off resisting so strongly, I guess. But pain goes a long way. And perhaps he's thinking that if the war is over quicker, fewer people will be dead. Which, of course, is not at all how it will work but....I'm trying to justify his actions. I don't want Peter to be a bad person because you've spent the last 45k making me CARE about him, how RUDE of you.
Ah, delicious, the I'm-not-the-spy conversation. This fic is rapidly making me aware of how much of a massive sucker I am for the hot mess that is the Order just before the end of the war. I JUST LOVE IT SO MUCH.
" She’d found out, with stupor, that she loved the wolf as well." stupor is probably not the word you want here? But I'm not 100% sure which word you do want.
" tracing her flanks with his fingers" again, more of a like....minor correction, but I'd probably go with thighs instead of flanks? Horses have flanks, but people generally don't. update: I just googled flank and I was NOT applying it correctly to humans because I forgot how to translate horse skeletons to human skeletons?? anyway, the meaning you're going for is "waist", not "flanks", my bad. (i am not good at english, and yet....it is my best language.......)
" misterious" mysterious
OH NO IS PETER GOING TO MURDER DORCAS
OH GOD NO CHIARA DON'T DO THIS TO ME PERSONALLY
HOW COULD YOU
oh my godddd she's dead and PETER KILLED HER and i had managed to FORGET that she was dead!!!! i was enjoying her so much that I genuinely forgot that by the end of this story she had to be dead! I regret getting emotionally invested in a story where almost every character canonically dies at the end.
Oh my god Remus RUN LEAVE THIS PLACE!!!! I guess he cleaned up his vomit before he got outta there. Pete why are you the worst. Obviously I would say something about how Remus really should've had that conversation in person (though for once he has a very good justification! His girlfriend has just died!) except I really hate Peter Pettigrew and want Remus as far away from him as possible
(who am I kidding, I am HEARTBROKEN that peter pettigrew would betray me personally in this way)
Ah, Peter realising it was him or them, and then Voldemort crucio-ing him anyway!!! that was such a perfect betrayal scene. But booyyyyy I am so sad about everything. ðŸ˜” why did I read this fic that could only end in pain??
Hi, Emma, my love!
It's almost midnight but I don't want to go to bed yet, so I thought I'd reply to these last two reviews of yours... :P
I'm sorry for making you care for Peter and then turning it all upside down... no, it's not true, I'm not sorry... the way I see it, Peter had already lost hope. Yes, he tried to resist at first because he wanted to stay loyal to his friends, but then the torture and the threats and the fear of dying and the doubt of his friends' love became too much to take and I think he thought there was no point... actually, I'm not even sure if he was thinking straight in that moment. I don't think you can think straight in certain life ot death situations...
I'm glad you liked that confrontation between Sirius and Remus, I think it was an important thing to show, since we know from canon that Sirius believed Remus to be the spy. :(
Okay, this time I truly am sorry... Dorcas' death is the part of this story that killed me the most to write... I'm so, so sorry... she didn't deserve it... and Peter is just awful... (but I love him anyway?)
Remus should have had that conversation in person... probably he shouldn't have gone to Peter in the first place, it wasn't the smartest thing to do, but rationality and sentiments rarely go along, right? And yes, I know, Peter deserves to be hated... Once again, my apologies...
Glad you "liked" the betrayal scene, as painful as it was. Sorry for making this chapter so painful... *hugs*
oh my god chiara is this going to be a PETER PETTIGREW RAISES HARRY POTTER FIC
I SURE DID NOT SEE THIS COMING
Look I honestly don't know why anyone faced with Voldy would try any spell other than the good ole AK, he's definitely gonna kill you and i'm pretty sure the ministry won't put you in azkaban for murdering Voldemort
ohhhhh my goooodnesssssss i was hoping somehow that the Potters would be reunited, but of course Harry is still missing, this is the worst! By which I mean I am extremely emotionally invested in it and I love it a lot!
Remus. Remus John Lupin. Remus you look at me when I'm talking to you. Are you listening? Are you? Listen to this: YOU ARE THE WORST. drop peter! drop him like he's a tonne of bees!!!! you can't still love him, he KIDNAPPED YOUR FRIEND'S BABY AND IS LEAGUE WITH LORD VOLDEMORT.
oh my god PETER why would you WRITE A LETTER why are you the WORST UGH I HATE THIS (i love it) REMUS PLEASE S T O P
I mean obviously I talk a big game, but in that kind of life-or-death situation, what would I choose? I never want to find out but I don't have high hopes.
oh my god, of course, that's who jimmy portman is!!!!!!
well chiara, know that I loathe everything about how this story ends and tomorrow I will eagerly devour the sequel. Everything manages to be like........................almost worse than canon? Or I guess just equally painful. How did you make an Everybody Lives equally painful? That takes a lot of skill. God, this story was masterfully told and it was such a joy to read, thank you!
Ahahah! Surprise! :P
Yes, that's exactly what it was all about (what Jimmy Portman is all about, actually...)
Yeah, an Avada Kedavra would be the logic choice when faced with Voldemort... but I suppose it has something to do with good wizards avoiding dark magic... and Harry killed him with an Expelliarmus in the end, so... but yes, Frank should probably have gone for it...
If Harry was reunited with the Potters, I would have no story to tell... once again, sorry...
I think I told you already, but reading you shouting at Remus makes me chuckle every single time! :P And of course you are right, he should let him go... but as I already said, love is not logical... as for Peter... well, at least he's trying? And I guess no one would really ever want to find out...
Oh, come on. It isn't worse than canon. Sirius won't spend twelve years in Azkaban, Remus will have friends around (even if the heartbreak over Peter will always be there) and James and Lily will get their chance to life (even if the heartbreak over Harry will always be there). It's really not THAT bad... <3
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing the whole story, it really meant a lot! And I'm so, so glad you enjoyed the journey! And I can't wait to hear your thoughts about Jimmy!
Yaxley?????? Oh my god. I never considered Peter being part of the Sacred Twenty-Eight, huh.
Oh nooooo, the HEARTBREAK of having to LOCK YOUR CHILD IN THE GARAGE and then hear him suffer so!!! I had never considered how hard it must have been for the Lupins and boy am I considering that now.
Oh man, baby child Peter creeping his mother out, this is a much more evil Peter than the Peter in my head? Which obviously isn't bad, different interpretations of characters are good! With my image of Peter, there wouldn't be warning signs except for blind loyalty and he could be convinced to do anything for approval. This Peter is....darker than that. Capable of doing evil by himself.
The concept of Remus running on just as the train doors closed gave me the willies, I hate trains so much -- what if the doors close on me, what if I fall through the gap, what about PROPER SAFETY MEASURES. I mean, Britain wouldn't know proper safety measures from Adam, so...I mean, it's totally accurate. This is after all the country that had buses that you could get onto while they were moving.
I am intrigued by this beginning! A Peter who has blood connections and a local wizarding community! Remus Lupin, too small to understand the gravity of his situation! If my internet ever cooperates, I am keen to read the next chapter. I just have to actually load it.
Hey, Emma, darling! :)
Finally I'm here to reply to your reviews, sorry it took me so long...
Ah, yes, Yaxley. I didn't really think too much about it in the beginning, I just wanted to pick a Pureblood surname... it turned out to be quite central in the end, didn't it? :P
Yes, it must have been terrible for them... and for little Remus, too... I can't get over how tragic his backstory is, poor child... :(
My interpretation of Peter is that he is vengeful and quick to anger (but I suppose you know how I see him by now...) I wouldn't call him evil, necessarily, but he surely has a dark side and I wanted to show that.
Ahahah! I didn't mean it as a dangerous thing? But now that you mention it, yes, it is... wizards aren't very good at safety measures anyway, are they? :P
Glad you found the first chapter intriguing, now I'm moving on to reply to the other reviews! ;)
Lots of love,
"Would you really decide who you want to be, based on who your friends are? Don't you find it childish?" WOOOOOF. THERE WE ARE. there is that defining characteristic of Peter Pettigrew, I love this whole exchange with the hat so much.
Glad you liked Peter's sorting. Yes, that's how he is, trying to fit in by being what people around him expect him to be...
Yeah, I think making Remus feel bad is what he was trying to do... as I said, he's vengeful... :/
I had no idea "colloguing" was an archaic word... I just picked it from google translator... :P Anyway, I like the idea of Peter as an observer, it fits with his personality and with him becoming a spy later on... as for not finding out about Remus sooner... I don't think anyone would ever imagine their friend to be a werewolf, right?
Again, that's Peter, I think? I'm glad you liked Peter approaching James and Sirius here. :)
See you on the next chapter in a moment!
I've never seen a Remus who is reluctant to become friends with Sirius and James before -- I guess because I have some vague memory of the canon story being that they met on the train? but maybe I'm wrong -- and it's really interesting. Like, I'd always imagined that Remus a) genuinely enjoyed the mischief (obviously) and b) was....I guess, Peter-like, just Grateful To Have Friends. Reluctant to get too close, sure, but keen to do a friendship. This is not at all that Remus and I'm very excited to see where it's going. This Remus makes sense -- he would be reluctant to get involved in any trouble because if wasn't a model student, the teachers could very well just decide to ruin his life, so he wouldn't want to risk that.
I don't think they met on the train in canon... James and Sirius shared a compartment, and for a little while Lily and Severus were with them, but I don't remember Peter or Remus being mentioned to be there? But maybe I remember wrong, too... :P Either way, my idea is that Remus is just too scared of his secret being uncovered and of hurting someone or being hurt by someone, so he doesn't want to get too close to anyone. And that people like James and Sirius in particular would scare him even more because they are popular and rowdy and... just a bit overwhelming, I guess?
No, Remus doesn't know how friendship works... or just simply compassion, really... he's so used to being isolated and bullied that he can't process people being nice to him with no other reason than being nice... my poor child... :(
Yes, I know, it's a bit out of the blue... I had a draft of that scene but it didn't fit in my structure and I couldn't make it work anyway and I thought I could just leave it to the reader's imagination... :P My idea was that James and Sirius were making a scene in the common room and were making fun of Lily about Severus and then Remus intervened saying that they were just bullies and unrespectful of people's feelings and cowards and then he just ran off when he realized that everyone was staring at him. Something like that. Anyway...
Interrogate him until he breaks down is NOT a good idea... but all's well that ends well, right? Still, poor Remus...
Rules? What are they? :P And yes, Peter would be scared by a present from the Marauders, but if Remus chose it maybe it's not that dangerous. ;)
Yes, I know that the rhymes weren't precise, but I was trying to give it a sort of assonance and poetic cadence (even if not in a precise metric necessarily)? I suppose things don't sound the way I think they do... English pronunciation is HAAAAARD.
Hugs! Well, Remus is happy, it's a good thing, isn't it?
Okay, I really have to go now, but I will try to be back with more replies soon!
Oh boyyyy, Remus's relationship with Sirius and James is so GOOD. It makes so much sense and yet I'd never considered it like this before? Sirius and James think they're being nice because they'd punch anyone who was rude to him, but in terms of the parts of friendship that Remus actually wants -- like, say, feeling safe and unjudged -- they're massively falling down.
" Marlene's breast" should be Marlene's breasts
Oh my godddd i'm going to DIE he's talking to his dad and i'm going to DIE tell me when it's over i can't look
john lupin is such a champ, what a legend.
oh my god i just realised that now he'll end up ACTUALLY DOING SOMETHING ABOUT THESE FEELINGS and i am melting in second hand embarrassment already, oh noooooooo
The fact that no one was expelled for the Mary incident but Hagrid was expelled for having a large spider as a pet even though it definitely wasn't petrifying or killing people is............a lot. why is hogwarts SO BAD at being a school.
Oh! Also, throughout the fic, you use "Madam Pomphrey" when it should be "Madam Pomfrey". I mean, it's not important, but just if you wanted to know.
Peter i'm going to PERISH please oh my god
also "famelic" is not a word I've ever encountered and I think it's obsolete? But once again, I'm not sure which word to replace it with. So we'll just have to revive this word too.
" repulsing" I'd probably change this to repulsive?
Look I'm not going to lie, I had to skim the bit where Remus actually confronts Peter, the second hand embarrassment is TOO STRONG, but that is an Emma problem, not a you problem. I'm just a weenie.
A weenie who is very apprehensive about....what will inevitably come next. I hate knowing Peter will betray-- hang on, if in this universe Neville is the chosen one, maybe he DOESN'T betray them? but that chapter coming up is called "traitors", oh goddddd
Ahahah! James and Sirius do love him... they just like to make fun of him... in a totally friendly way, of course... (that's how boys' friendship works, I think?) But no, they aren't particularly good at "safe and unjudged". :P
John Lupin is a great man, no arguing! ;)
Remus actually doing something about his feelings? Are you kidding me? I mean... I guess he will... very carefully... very messily... but there's probably no reason for you to panic over it... or maybe yes, I'm not sure...
Certain things don't make sense. Wizards are quite irrational sometimes. The only thing I can say is that the culprits were never caught (or at least, it was never proved that they did anything), otherwise I'm quite sure they would be expelled. Still not very good, because proving things doesn't always seem a priority in the wizarding world, but...
Ah, Peter... my boys are idiots, I apologize... :/
I'm sorry that final bit embarrassed you a little... but of course sensibility is different for each one of us and that's okay. :) As for what's going to come... well, you already know, so...
Lots of hugs, my dear!
" It was already a conquer." I genuinely am not sure what this sentence is supposed to be, but conquer isn't a noun, the noun is conquest. That said, I wouldn't say 'conquest' makes any sense here either, so uhh... I'm really not terribly helpful, I'm so sorry.
"Don't be a dumper" -- I...have never heard 'dumper' used as an insult? Obviously, there is more in heaven and earth than I've heard of, so don't take that as law, I'm just letting you know that I can't find it on the internet either.
" He kept his eyes shut, despite the burning desire to set them on his face." I am also not sure what this means?
remus why are you being like this, REMUS NO remus don't noooooo my boyyyy this is NOT the answer, you know this was sirius's fault!!!!! my boy!!!!!!
these boys are so goddamn broken, someone help them express emotion in a healthy way and deal with their conflicts oh my goddd
ohhh OH MY GOD DID HE REALLY JUST SAY THAT WOW JAMES
pete, my boy, if it makes you feel better, there is another option to him believing it on some level! he could have just noticed your discomfort and decided that's the thing that would hurt you most! i mean......it's a generous interpretation, but....
" He'd sort of hoped Remus would take his defenses, instead he'd just worried about his damned secret." -- should be "take his side" or "come to his defence", you've kind of scrambled them both. I think if he's referring back to the thing James said, 'come to his defence' makes more sense?
Remus my boy I think you taking the moral high ground here when you did nothing to stop them tormenting snape is a bit rich.
MY BOY WHY ARE YOU MAKING SUCH POOR DECISIONS
" The bald man who'd made the incision" incision is definitely not the right word? engraving, perhaps? not 100% what this is referring to, but unless he's cutting Remus open, I doubt it's an incision.
this chapter is just My Boys Make Bad Decisions: The Feature Film
I'm so sorry this review is 50% correcting you and 50% yelling "MY BOY" repeatedly. i just have no other thoughts other than [unintelligible screaming]
I'm afraid Remus's not going to listen... :P And no, I'm not going to apologize, sorry... And yes, my boys are idiots, but I said that already... :/
He did just say that... side note, here is where the events in "Shattering, dying, healing" take place, meaning the reason James is so broken and has that outburst is because he received the news of Aaron's death that morning. This doesn't really justify him, but, you know...
Oh, well. Yes, a bit rich, but he did just stop them? Even if he should have much earlier? I guess he's trying, at least? (I know I shouldn't keep defending my characters, I can't help it...)
Ahahah! this chapter is just My Boys Make Bad Decisions: The Feature Film Yes, that sums it up quite well! :P
can i start a kickstarter for remus's self-esteem, just let yourself be happy!!! yes your relationship with peter is a dysfunctional mess, but it's high school, any high school relationship is going to be a dysfunctional mess!!! let yourself have good things!
You can, but I doubt you will be too successful... I don't think Remus will ever allow himself happiness, no matter how good your arguments are...
Peter is Peter, what can I say? That's the kind of thing he would do. Vengeful, remember?
Ahahah! Remus didn't do very well in that interview... such a bad liar... but that's the reason I love him, you know? :P And yay for the kids' protest! They are special! :)
Glad you liked the Yaxleys scene, too. Poor Peter... :(
I'm so glad you enjoyed this chapter, I think it's one of my favourites. :) Glad you liked the political aspects, too, because I was a bit nervous about it... Thank you so much for the wonderful review!
oh no oh my boy. jk does her metaphors for irl oppressions so poorly but it's good to see you taking them and treating them right. by which i mean: forcing him to wear the wrist band is the worst and 100% what would happen
Ah, yes, that's just plain awful, isn't it? I'm glad you thought that's something that would likely happen, though, because I feared to have gone a bit too far... but we know that these things (and worse things) have happened (and might happen again, and possibly are happening) in reality, so it really shouldn't be surprising? The world is such a bad place at times... :(
But back to Remus... yes, he's ashamed of the band... as for everyone at Hogwarts knowing... well, as you know I worked around that one... it's still not a secret, since the Ministry had always been aware of Remus' lycanthropy. And as for him getting the DADA job in the future... okay, little spoiler (not sure if it even is a spoiler, because I doubt I'll ever get to write Jimmy, year 3...) he won't, but for different reasons. :P
I will never spell career right, I'm sorry. It's just out of my capabilities.
Severance pay is a real thing, but Remus is just too stubborn and proud, I'm afraid. And no, I don't think he's really thought it through, but it's going to work out anyway.
Can't blame Dorcas for wanting to date Remus, either. :P (Dunno if I mentioned this before, I'm sure you guessed even if I didn't, I have a little bit of a crush on Remus...)
The thing about James is, he is the bully everyone fears, but he doesn't realize. He doesn't mean to hurt people, he just can't tell the difference between a nice joke and being humiliating and cruel (that's how I've always imagined it, anyway). And now he's just got to the point where he's starting to see things in a more adult light and he's starting to realize where the line should be drawn. And well, I suppose Remus' message had to pass at a certain point, even if it took a while. Repetita iuvant, right? :P
I'm happy you are proud of Remus' decision to wear the band! And I'm also glad you enjoyed their final prank (I had a lot of fun writing it!) :D Yes, it's all going downwards from here, I'm afraid... but you know already... :(
Perfectly creepy banner by Fireheart @ TDA
Aislinn Walker knew when she was recruited as an Unspeakable that her job would be dangerous. Returning to Hogwarts as a student was a task she hadn’t expected. Facing death as it stalked the blood-splattered halls would be a nightmare she might never recover from.
(Edit 09-01-2018: Changed a minor OC's name from Adhara Black to Aurora Black)
I am confused that she's going (undercover???) as a Fifth Year. Given she's what, 25ish, I would've thought she'd be a Seventh Year but I'm sure you've got this all thought out.
Ooh, I wonder how she's going to keep the fact that she's the Unspeakable under wraps because logically if she was here seven years ago, she's going to know most of the teachers? And they'll be like "surely you were here seven years ago and also you are twenty-five". But again, I'm sure you have this figured out, I'm just thinking out loud, you know?
The Manacle is such a deliciously creepy artefact. Oooh, maybe she's going to Polyjuice the poor Charlotte Banks? I mean, that'll be....worse, I feel, than announcing her death, but hmmmmmm that's certainly a way she could stay secret.
OH MY GOD SHE'S GOING TO WEAR THE MANACLE TO BECOME CHARLOTTE BANKS?
look i should have realised this earlier but i'm not very bright
I loved this chapter! It was a really good mix of exposition and uhh...whatever the opposite of that is? The little snippet we got of Caitlin having to do a (mostly-)nudie run back to the castle was so delightful because we know so little about her, and we know she's dead, but the fact that one of the few things we DO know is that once she had to dash across the grounds in her undies in such a...low-stakes kind of way? is so good. Like, it was just standard 17yos being 17yos. A little snapshot of her being a child, even if she didn't get to live all that much longer.
I'm also intrigued by the idea of Dumbledore's office shifting from place to place -- in the books, wasn't it always in the one tower? I'm into the idea of it moving though, sounds like something Dumbledore would do tbh.
Oh nooooooooo, THAT's what those scars were in the first chapter!
My eyebrows were VERY high when she got paired with Sirius, I was like "is this....it would make no tonal sense for this to turn into a Sirius/OC fic, surely, and there's no pairings listed" but of course that did not happen. I should have more faith! (I'm sorry, I have just.....read too many fics in the thirteen years I've been in this fandom. I have seen too much.)
Oh mannnn, the moral dilemma she must be having about like....whether she has a moral obligation to live out Charlotte's desires? Separate from passing as Charlotte, I mean. Should she accept Peter's date offer because Charlotte would want to? This is so ethically fraught and I LOVE it.
I also SUPER love the existence of this study group!!! Oh nooo, poor Deidre though :(
OH NO. Someone's infiltrated the Department!!!! Absolutely nothing is coming up Milhouse, poor thing. I hadn't even begun to consider the uses of the Manacle though, it would be utterly perfect for Ministry infiltration, as she says.
I didn't realise that bezoars as antidotes was unusual knowledge? I guess perhaps for fifth years though? I mean, again, this isn't crit, I am just thinking out loud and am not terribly bright.
I liked this chapter a lot, the whole story is so well-paced so far!
Poor Peter, but I'm glad she managed to give him the slip. I decided not to google the French, because I want it to be a surprise (I mean, it's "??? of the death", I know that much, but I very much forget what voile means). I also loved seeing the toll being Charlotte is taking on Aislinn -- how she's beginning to lose track of where Charlotte ends and she begins, mixing memories, mixing self-knowledge. It's delicious.
haha WOMP WOMP aislinn, you've been made. oh no aislinn this is IMPORTANT it is PLOT RELEVANT it is THE TITLE OF THE FIC DON'T-- shift. there we go.
omggg Lily coming to Peter's defence!!! I love it!!! I love your Lily so much, what little we've got of her so far.
" That alone casted a shadow" should be 'cast', I think?
Ah, the good ole uterus excuse. Beautiful.
THE WIGTOWN WARRIORS ARE PLAYING AT HOME. OH MY GOD. this is my new favourite euphemism, ohhh my god. I can die happily now, that euphemism was just the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.
Your soundtrack at the end of each chapter makes me remember that I'm listening to wildly inappropriate music while reading the fic and writing these reviews -- unfortunately, I don't think the review box will accept the non-English alphabet the titles are in. As I'm writing this it's "Lo Normali" by Ido B and Zooki (those spellings are...questionable, since it's transliteration and everything's made up?).
I liked this chapter a lot! I feel like I haven't properly reviewed it, I'm so sorry. I really hope Aislinn doesn't take Lily's character judgement as gospel, she's known him since they were small! she is objectively a poor judge of character, at least when it comes to severus snape!!! don't believe her, aislinn!!!
oooh boy, this is it, this is when things start happening!!! I mean obviously they have been happening this whole time, but the ACTUAL PROPHECY. i am PUMPED.
It's always a bad sign when the wards collapse, oh noooo. OH GOD WHAT THE HECK OH MY GOD I HAVE TO SLEEP TONIGHT!!! look this was my fault for reading this fic after dark. oh god the scene with the Inferi was soooo baaaad, I may have nightmares, the hand!!!! with painted fingernails!!!! end me
oh my godddd I hope you know that I'm just making small sad distressed noises as I read this, there is blood seeping out from under the Hufflepuff common room door!!!!!!! why would you do this!!!!!!! THEY'RE COMING FROM THE MIRRORS!!!!! now, look here, I haven't cleaned my teeth yet, i have to look in the bathroom mirror for that. I may never sleep again. I may never be able to look into a mirror again. goodbye.
I feel like that exchange with Sprout pretty much blew her cover, but obviously that's the last thing she has to worry about now, there are so many people who are DEAD oh my goddd
I'm sure I was meant to have thoughts about this chapter but honestly all my brain is doing is screaming "oh my god there are so many STUDENTS DEAD and INFERI COMING OUT OF THE MIRRORS and i can NEVER SLEEP AGAIN" so uhhhhhh. I don't think that's gonna happen.
oh my god. ohhhhhh my god. i. look, I knew from the AU tag that anyone was fair game to die but oohhh myyy goddddd. i did not expect so many! james! peter! mcgoogs!!!!
I have so many questions about this Darkest Timeline -- why did Remus attack? was it just dark magic interacting with other dark magic? how did Deidre get the book -- who was the bookshop owner? why was Snape buying the Beloveds book?
But I'm not sure I'll get any of those answers. It could very well be that everything about Snape was a massive red herring. The black lilies, too, seem like they haven't been resolved yet -- though there is one more chapter to go, of course. I feel like I kind of need to read that one so I can have coherent thoughts? So sorry about the declining quality of the reviews on this story D:
good.....god. this was terrifying. it's up there with the time I read The Yellow Wallpaper really late at night not realising it was a horror story, but worse because!!!! something is coming for her!!!!!!!
You have such a masterful way of painting really vivid pictures -- "obscenely swollen" really stood out to me for some reason as an example. I feel like bleeding wallpaper is a familiar image, but I can't remember what from? Your description of the wallpaper hallucination was excellently creepy. Also when the beetle burst out of Caitlin's hand!!! The worst.
God, I wish the wizarding world had heard of the concept of PTSD, someone help this poor person!!
The Department of Mysteries is such an untapped mine of possibility, imo (am I mixing my metaphors there?? ah well) -- you could have ANYTHING happen! And people don't explore it enough, so I'm super super glad you are.
So much about this first chapter is done SO well, aaah -- the hints of what to come, the idea that there's some kind of monster after her, that it was at HOGWARTS, that Snape and Lily are involved -- like, I imagine they don't hand out Order of Merlins for just anything, so some big must've happened. This makes me wonder, though I guess I could look it up in that scene where Dumbledore is explaining it, whether putting your memories in something else completely erases them or just makes them like...less urgent, you know? Less likely to pop up unless you consciously focus on them. I hope it's the former, because I don't want Aislinn to be stuck in this PTSD hell with no access to medical care. ðŸ˜”
If nothing else, I hope that she got to pick that job as Keeper's Assistant. They should be bending over backwards to give her the job she wants.
banner by abhorsen. @TDA
Meeting banshees in the Forbidden Forest, setting the Great Hall on fire, and smuggling in contraband: Victoire and Fred Weasley are trouble with a capital T.
HPFT FROGS: Best Family/Friendship Runner Up for Victoire and Fred (2018), Ravenclaw Nargle: Best Ravenclaw Character (2017), Featured Story (June 2018) | HPFF Diadem: Little Claw (2016), Ravenclaw SotM: Best Characterization (July 2015) | 1st in the 'Halloween Fanfiction' Challenge at Shadowplay
Okay I am here and I am going to liveblog a few chapters in one review because the chapters are quite short!
Omg yes I've always wondered what happens if you miss the train! It must happen, logically - probably every year SOMEONE misses the train. It's kind of odd that they don't take the register as you're getting on the train, honestly, because then they would know who was missing and how much drama it would be for them to get there under their own steam (a muggleborn missing the train!! What would they even do! Terrifying). But whatever hogwarts, we know you're complete garbage at being a functional school and you have no duty of care.
Look, lads. I know we all do silly things in the heat of the moment, but you can't salvage this situation. Just cut your losses and make yourself known to your parents. Why! Why are you like this! Buds! I really hope teddy is home.
Of course they missed the train teddy, it is after 11am!! Get with it! I feel like teddy should have his stuff together and not be eating breakfast at 11am but I frequently do, so....glass houses and all that.
Oooh my goodness, did my phone decide to give me the whole fic in one page? What a legend. I don't even have to turn my wifi back on to keep reading. I loved the first chapter! The ways each of them wasted time in diagon was such a neat way to give characterisation. Is there a reason teddy's block of flats had no numbers? I'm curious.
I was not sure how many chapters I would read but I am enjoying this fic and the bus ride is only half over, so onto the second one!
GOLDSTEIN. it will surprise you not at all to learn that my soft spot for Goldstein is the size of a small country and I am SO GLAD he is here, regardless of whether he actually says anything. Presumably he will because he's her head of house which means you will have him say more words than he does in canon. :P (two words, it's not a hard bar to clear.)
So they MUST take the register at some point on the train, huh. I wonder how that works!
Oh noooo, is he in mourning? :( I hope there's a non sad reason for the covered mirror.
Behoove is the WEIRDEST word. I don't think I've ever used it. I don't think I know how to conjugate it? Is it a regular verb??? I'm not going to look it up because it's more fun as a mystery.
What is draining my phone battery so quickly, noooo, I want to keep reading! I guess at 25% I'll stop so my phone doesn't go flat.
Oooh my god victoire what kind of a Weasley checks out all the books on animagi, that's so suspicious. Stretch it out! Get your friends to borrow some! Plan this better, girl.
Colour me INTRIGUED about who this second in command is. Interesting that magizoology exists as a separate subject from comc?? I'd love to hear more of your thoughts about that, I'll have to poke you after this review. I'm so glad medical magic is a class, though I feel like it should be compulsory for at least one term, but again. Hogwarts. Bad at being a school. I'm so interested in all of your reasoning for these new classes, aaah.
I love Anthony and I love that he knows EXACTLY what she is about.
This fic is SO MUCH FUN and I'm definitely coming back to read more of it soon!!! Vic is obviously a gem and ANTHONY and also NEVILLE and also Fred is good and also TEDDYYYY oh my god be less obvious, boyyyy, your crush can be seen from SPACE. You leave such good and well-thought out reviews and I just...have....thoughts and nothing useful to say but I PROMISE I LOVE THIS FIC. I just am not good at expressing it.
I'm still in awe of how much thought you've put into how the school works -- with new subjects, new teaching structures, etc. instead of the impossible mess JKR left with us. I have no idea what the UK school system is like, since I only went to primary school there and primary school doesn't have real classes, but it's fascinating seeing your quite specialised subjects -- in Australia high school subjects are not half as specialised, except I guess in science where in year 11 and 12 it's split into chem/bio/physics/marine sciences/etc. But all the way through year 12 we just have "maths" and it baffled me in American tv shows or books where they have like....the subject Algebra? So much of maths is all interconnected, I have no idea how or why you'd compartmentalise it like that. It's just really cool how we all bring different takes to HP fic, because I would never have thought of having such specialised subjects at high school level, and I love it. It also makes sense that they start specialising this early if there's no tertiary education, but that's a whole other kettle of fish.
I'm also very curious about why Anthony is a nightmare of a professor, I'm so excited.
I love the Ford Anglia cameo, of course. What a good little car, still chugging along.
Oh my goddddd VIC DON'T PICK IT UP. LISTEN TO FRED. VIC I SWEAR YOU WILL REGRET THIS.
Ohhhhh nooooooooooooo. VIC. WHAT IF IT WAS YOUR DEATH SHE WAS PORTENTING?
I super love your scenes at the house tables in the Great Hall, I can't quite place why -- I think it's the idea of everyone exchanging news and gossiping
Aaaah the banshee scene was so evocative and great, although I'm now worried about Fred. I guess maybe Victoire being cousin might have something to do with her being part-veela? I'm excited to see how that plays out!
I think that there should be a system like -- you know how they always tell you that ambos don't care if you took something illegal, they just want to know what you took so they can treat it as best they can? The Hospital Wing should be like that, so you're safe to go there with your Highly Illegal Ailments.
VICTOIRE. VICTOIRE MIDDLENAME WEASLEY. YOU GO STRAIGHT TO AN ADULT, DO NOT PASS GO, DO NOT COLLECT TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS. I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU. GOLDSTEIN CAN BE SUMMONED TO THE HOSPITAL WING, THIS IS EXTREMELY A CASE FOR THE HOSPITAL WING OH M YGODDDDDD.
Yesssssss, Anthony and Neville together teaming up!!!! I LOVE IT.
"I have no idea," he said, sagging against the doorframe. "Ask me later. Or tomorrow." He lowered his voice. "Is there anything else you haven't told me that I might need to know? Anything at all?"
I don't know why I loved that bit especially but I did. It's something about the admission of vulnerability, even though he's a teacher and also her head of house?
VICTOIRE YOU TELL HIM THE WHOLE TRUTH AND NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH RIGHT NOW OR SO HELP ME
Someone give Anthony a drink, he deserves it.
Newly minted journalist Ginny Potter reluctantly reports on The National Gobstones Convention.
Written for the Game On Volume II Collab at HPFF
Zany banner by amoretti @ TDA!
I yelled when I saw this because YESSS. Job Fic is one of my favourite genres. I loooove how Ginny is like "this is so..why.......gobstones......." and how Hermione is probably mostly there to watch her suffer and giggle while she's not looking.
The pamphlet was the greatest thing I have ever seen and I want to frame it, ohhh my goodness. What a genius and beautiful moment. I also love that Ginny was able to find an angle she could actually enjoy reporting on! When in doubt, make it a human interest story, haha.
Your characterisation of Ginny and Hermione was excellent, as were the tiny details like the fact that Ginny forgot Hermione wouldn't have her reflexes and threw her the camera. I don't know what else to gush about but honestly I loved this whole thing. ♥
Even with the war over and Voldemort defeated, many wrongs remained to be set right. After nearly fifty years of paying for Tom Riddle's crimes, Hagrid is finally ready to clear his name. But there are still those who are not ready to hear the truth.
Hagrid!!!!!! I had always assumed Hagrid would finally be able to practice magic after the war but I'd never considered that logically, he would need that decision legally overturned -- and this was a wonderful fic that really illustrated how that would go down. Of course the end of the war hasn't meant the end of prejudice, and the fact that it was a halfblood instead of a pureblood who was the "villain" (though of course....he wouldn't have been if the conservative faction weren't 24 strong, but that's another argument for another day) because in an environment where society has created the idea that acceptance/magic/basic rights are a finite resource, of course even people oppressed under the system are going to end up reinforcing it.
Harry's dilemma was also delightful -- I'm really glad Hagrid had no knowledge of it. Absolving an innocent man by threatening to condemn an innocent man is....well, I can see how Harry might be turning that over in his brain for a long time. It was also nice to see that the war hadn't completely broken Harry -- sure, he did it in the moment, but he expressed uncertainty to Doge and didn't immediately justify it to himself.
I can't believe this fic is 6k, it reads so easily that it feels much shorter! Which I reckon is a good thing? It manages to be deceptively simple on the surface but raise a lot of questions about the state of Wizarding society after the end of the war. I loved it.
Hogwarts students cause trouble. Their professors know this.
So I was browsing the Anthony Goldstein tag, as one does, and I came across this and I LOVE stories about teachers and I also love Anthony Goldstein and Shenanigans, Capers and Hi-Jinks, so it was obvious that I had to read this.
and it was a delight!! I still think that Victoire was a fool for checking them all out at once -- spread it around, you have enough cousins, or at LEAST borrow them one or two at a time -- but I love that Anthony was alerted, presumably by the librarian. And I love that he told Neville, even though Victoire is in his house because he KNOWS Neville will have to be on the lookout for Fred doing animagus-related shenanigans as well.
Neville is clearly so relieved that for once he doesn't have to do anything and gosh I love these two and I love the way you've captured them in such a short piece, Branwen! Wonderful.
James and Lily Potter didn't have to die.
(banner by me)
KAYLA. IT IS TWO AM. KAYLA I AM REALLY SAD? KAYLA!!!!!!!!!!!
Look, I knew SOMEONE was going to die at the end of this because I accidentally saw Sian's review first. And then as soon as Sirius left Peter's, I knew it would be him, because of course it would be. To be honest, I thought Harry was going to die too, but I'm glad you didn't do that -- because it's the same sacrifice.
My favourite bit hands down was the confrontation between Sirius and Remus though, because I am a very predictable person. I imagine that the reason Sirius looks so wrecked when Remus comes in is because he didn't want to believe it and had just spent days trying to come to terms with Remus being the spy (and failing), and then -- aaah
"Is this just general paranoia, or is it the whole lycanthropy thing?" he asks lightly as he rolls his sleeves up to his elbows. <--- This is my faaaave line, it's just so Remus? Also the bit where he's ASHAMED OF THE WEREWOLF WORK. That had never occurred to me as a reason for him to keep it secret but it makes so much sense, it works SO WELL.
Kayla you nailed this whole piece, you nailed them both, god it was SO GOOD but it's 2am and I am sleepy. Thank you for emotionally destroying me, it was a pleasure to be ripped into pieces.
Beautiful Banner by Asphodelic @ TDA!
WINNER of Sameth Saboly's Flip Side Fic Challenge
Hannah Abbott has never owned a pub before, but when Madame Rosmerta is the victim of an untimely death, she finally has her chance.
Hi Kaitlin! I'm here to return some of the presents the nifflers nicked from you! I know you didn't ask for reviews for yourself but PLOT TWIST I haven't left a review for you before! So it counts! (Okay so it's an author you've never read before and I have read your entry for the Prefect Challenge, but that doesn't coooount.)
This was a delightful story, even if the ending was decidedly not delightful. :( Your horror writing is impeccable, and I love how you weaved the horror into the setup at the beginning of the humour chapter so it wasn't a complete surprise in the second. I know the whole humour chapter/horror chapter thing was the challenge, but you used it so well -- the reader is expecting everything to come good in the second chapter, because it did in the first chapter, even though the beginning was similarly spooky but then it DOESN'T. The spookiest bit is definitely the Jenna turning away, because it's so unexpected and she had seemed so friendly and normal and not part of whatever shenanigans were going on?
The way you characterise Hannah is so delightfully true to the glimpses we get in the books -- her cheery attitude, her willingness to laugh at herself and her desire to own a pub in the first place, because that's like… a building block of community and that's very hufflepuff.
Overall, I loved this Kaitlin, and I will definitely have to read more of your stuff!!
Absolutely stunning banner by the incredible Elenia @TDA // Pride of Gryffindor Awards 2017 Joint Best Novel
It begins with a disappearance: missing, presumed dead.
Pulled from obscurity at the Daily Prophet, Roxanne Weasley has the rare chance to cover one of the biggest stories of the year. But as she pieces the fragments of the mystery together, there's suddenly much more than just her story at risk.
Hey Sian! I'm here for the House Cup Maze 1 and also because I love murder mysteries and should read more of your work, so here we go!
I love the opening scene -- it's so visceral, you do so well creating the word-picture of the scene. Also, the way "dread worms its way through his body" is so evocative is excellent. I should use the word worm more often. The way the reader knows something is wrong because the man is sweating even though the sunlight is pale (idk, I associate that with the kind of weak winter sunlight that doesn't really bring much warmth) is just... idk Sian, I just really like it! There's a reason I don't take English classes at uni, it's because I struggle to write good reviews :P
The way we immediately jump to the excellent headline "GODRIC'S HOLLOW UNDER SEIGE FROM GARDEN GNOMES" reminds me of one of those procedural shows where the cold open is the murder and then we jump to normal things happening to Our Heroes, you know? It's very good. I love when fics have co-worker interactions for some reason, I don't know why. I love all the little details you've worked in -- calling the boss by his first name to show familiarity, the reputation of Violet, all of it.
I assume they're using nokia bricks or something. If they're not, don't tell me, I want to live in this world. :P Wait, no, if they're actually using enormous 80s bricks, please tell me that, it's hilarious.
"Since the Prophet has become independent from the Ministry" I have SO MANY QUESTIONS. I LOVE THIS SO MUCH. The whole state of media in the Potterverse is SO suspect and I love anything that addresses that, however tangentially.
Ooooh, intriguing Potter-Weasley dynamics! I wonder what she did -- I assume Daniel was a boyf, and Fred's friend first, and she.... Wronged him somehow? I guess we'll find out! I love Jane, too, and the way you've created her character immediately in such a short time.
A delightful first chapter, Sian!!! I look forward to reading more. :D
Hi Emma! It's so nice to see you stop by!
I'm really glad you liked the opening scene! That was actually a late addition to this chapter, written on the advice of a friend looking it over for me (way back in 2014, when I was writing this :P) but I'm really happy because most readers seem to think that it works, and that it conjures up the sort of images and questions that I was hoping to!
Yes, it's a bit of a change, but that section of the chapter was so fun to write! And the little details - I think I probably put far too many of them in this story in the end (hence the fact that it's a terrifying, 140k+ monster) but I have SO MUCH head canon for this next generation universe. So when reviewers pick up on those details (yes, I imagine the phones to be massive, 90s bricks) it's so exciting and makes it worth it!
You'll definitely find out more in time, but I can't really comment too much on Daniel and co yet - I will, however, say that you've picked up on quite a few of the hints I left in this chapter. Whether you've interpreted them correctly or not is something I couldn't possibly say :P
Thank you so much for this review - I'm really glad you enjoyed the first chapter!