since may is mental health awareness month i thought i'd finally open up about my own mental health(?). fyi, i was never officially diagnosed with...anything. and i won't self-diagnose.
i started writing this blog entry and wrote...idk maybe 200 words of my story and then i deleted everything because i couldn't post it. i guess it's still too personal and painful for me. so i'll just write some really tiny bits that i feel fine with posting.
at one point in my life, i talked to a psychologist who told me there was nothing wrong with me, that i was a narcissist and an attention seeker. (here's hoping she was wrong.)
at this point in my life, i'm literally lucky to be alive. (here's hoping it stays that way.)
where i live, mental health still isn't a topic i would be comfortable discussing, even with my own family. obviously, i'm not completely comfortable discussing it online, either. but i'm trying.
i've been on TDA for ten years and often i would tell people how it's an escape from RL for me. and it was/is. it's the same thing with HPFT even though i've only been here for a year. though no one quite knows how much it means for me to be able to lose myself in other worlds via books, or fanfics or graphics or computer games, but it means...a lot. (i'm sure it's similar to how a lot of people feel.)
so here's my tiny contribution to making discussions about mental health...if not comfortable then at least more manageable.
even this was hard for me to actually click on 'submit entry'
also, i like to talk to my cats. so, there. a bit of humour