Name: down-in-flames (Signed) · Date: 13 Feb 2020 03:59 AM · For: Unbreak My Heart

back with part two!

 

oh wow, andromeda has alzheimer’s. and teddy’s reaction to it is so complex and multifaceted, which is really interesting to explore. because he’s still angry at her for the way she’s treated him and almost upset that she’s now got this diagnosis which justifies that treatment (at least in part), but at the same time, he blames himself for it and is upset about it. it’s such a huge range of emotions, but it makes sense given teddy’s relationship with andromeda, which is equally as varied and nuanced.

 

oh my gosh, and he’s found tonks’ diary! that’s got to really be something for him, to have this piece of writing connected to his parents about part of her life he didn’t know about before. it reminds me a lot of the scene in ootp where harry finds lily’s letter! the observation about the matching letters is i think what really cements it for me. but it’s really interesting to learn that a lot of andromeda’s behaviors towards teddy were also reflected in how she raised tonks - i always assumed andromeda was the way she was because of remus and tonks’ deaths, but it seems her emotionally manipulative/abusive ways stem from even before that. and it seems to me like tonks was probably so protected even within her own diary for fear that her mum would find it? which would explain why she crosses out every mention of andromeda, but also, god, to be that afraid of your own mother that you can’t even speak candidly about her in something that’s meant to be a deeply private possession? it’s awful that andromeda’s now more or less done major damage to two kids across two generations.

 

but god, i’m so happy to see teddy with the potters now. like, the moment where he asks them for permission to go out with vega and is just braced for the worse because that’s what he’s used to? and instead just gets a very casual ‘yeah that’s fine just let us know where you’re going’? it’s a really good moment where you can see just how much of a shift has occurred in what his home life is going to be like.

 

and once again, vega continues to be the voice of encouragement for teddy! i really like their friendship - i’m also consistently amused by their interactions when teddy compliments her without thinking about it and she’s just kind of shaking her head at him for being completely unaware of what he’s doing. it’s just such a funny dynamic.

 

this was a super long chapter, but honestly the whole thing flowed so well that it really didn’t feel that long at all! i’ll definitely be back soon for more of this story :)

 

-taylor

Name: justawillowtree (Signed) · Date: 05 Aug 2019 03:50 AM · For: Unbreak My Heart

Haha the chapters keep getting longer omg. I don’t mind so much, but in general I think it’s a good idea to try to keep your chapters on the shorter, consistent side! (I’m one to talk lol, the one multi-chap I started just had chapters that kept stretching and stretching. It’s hard, keeping it down. :P)

 

OH my goodness, I didn’t actually think that my reference to Alzheimer’s a few chapters ago was actually right. Aww, poor Andromeda—she’s not a very kind person by any means, but it still must be really awful to experience something like that and not quite understand what’s wrong. I think Teddy’s flaw here is really interesting; he’s right in that he’s thinking somewhat selfishly when he wishes his grandmother didn’t have this excuse for making him feel terribly because, I mean, forgetting about Leo genuinely was not her fault, and he spent so much energy feeling furious towards her about it…and he probably should have realized something more serious was up. But at the same time, he’s a teenager whose grandmother didn’t treat him well, so of course he wants something good from her.

 

Really quickly, this line—“…‘soon’ for him meant anywhere between a week and four years. No in between”—doesn’t quite make sense; I feel like I’ve seen you use a similar phrase elsewhere before, but I just forgot to point it out. You jump from saying it could be “anywhere between” to “no in between,” you know? Just a small thing!

 

YAY HE’S LIVING WITH THE POTTERS YAY YAY YAY.

 

Also, Tonks’s journal?? That was reallyyy interesting to read about. It was also heartbreaking, though, seeing this AU version of Tonks WHO STILL DIDN’T GET TO LIVE. It seems like Andromeda has been this way since before Alzheimer’s, which is really unfortunate. Tonks and Teddy seem to be experiencing a lot of the same symptoms of depression (at least, that’s what it seems like to me), and so I hope that he can follow in his mother’s footsteps and seek help at university or something like that. It’s really awful that Andromeda could bring both of them to this point, though.

 

Okay the difference between the Potters and Andromeda is like day and night; the amount of relief I feel when I see Teddy with the Potters is ridiculous. I can’t even imagine how much better it must feel with them. His constant worries from having grown up with Andromeda are unnecessary here, and I hope that he’ll grow out of his self-esteem problems. :(

 

EVERYTHING WITH VEGA WAS AWESOME I LOVED SEEING TEDDY PHOTOGRAPH THINGS AHH.

 

This is wonderful! Keep up the good work! <3

 

Eva

Author's Response:

My chapters just keep longer and longer, ahaha... My longest one by far is the next one--it broke 8k words! I think the ones after that are consistently around 6k to 7k, so it evens out. I'm not even sure why they're getting longer, but when I try to split them up, the flow is suddenly all off and I'm not sure how to fix it. Maybe it has to do with what you pointed out before--the explaining details too much? Yeah, maybe that. It's been a while since I've taken a detailed look at the chapters, so that's something I need to do again. 

 

You pretty much nailed it yeah. As we see from Tonks' journal, she was like this even from before having Alzheimer's, so on some level she was truly a bit abusive. And although not everything can be justified by her Alzheimer's, some of the stuff we see in the story can be. It's sort of something he tries to come to terms with in this story. Let's see if I'm able to do that justice, lmao.

 

Oh, dang, some things really escape my eye when I'm editing these chapters. Thanks for pointing that out. 

 

That was practically my own reaction to him living with the Potters, lol. As much as he needed better guardians, I think the change in environment will let us look at his mental state now, instead of having it be worsened little by little by Andromeda (or something like that). 

 

I'M SORRY! But if his parents were alive, then this story wouldn't exist and I really wasn't about to turn Remus and Tonks into abusive parents. (Andromeda though? I was a little bit more lenient with her.) Yeah, I agree. It sucks that Andromeda brought both of them to this state, and I truly feel sad for the both of them. I know this is a little morbid, but I find it funny that Teddy happens to be going through the same thing that Tonks is, but fails to realize that he is, but also, I made him do that, because he knows next to nothing about mental illness. I deliberately took out any mention of depression, anxiety, abuse, etc. unless it was in mention of someone else.

 

Things are a lot better with the Potters! And I'm really glad for that, but it's also sad writing about the moments where he feels out of place, like when he thinks about how weird it is that Harry and Ginny actually talk to him for fun. 

 

I'm glad you liked seeing them together! They were really fun to write! c:

 

Thanks for reading and reviewing! xx