Name: CheekyTorah-Lex (Signed) · Date: 01 Jul 2020 12:49 AM · For: Summer at Quidditch Camp

Hey Thanks for writing for my challenge!

 

i really enjoyed this story! You brought together a couple of my favourite characters in a pairing I never thought of much before. And you know what? I totally ship it now!

 

the characterizations of these men make me smile! You did an excellent job pulling out that smouldering broody feel over always gotten from Cedric and that happy excitement from Oliver! You brought in an original character who I just loved (Rian) and I really liked that pronunciation of his name! 

 

The plot was great, it wasn't all angst and love, there was adequate amounts of quidditch action and rowdy boys to break up the tension! And let's talk tension for a second because damn that was some lovely sexual tension!

i am craving the answer of what happens next? Do they get together or was this a summer fling? Will you be writing more?

 

great job! 

Name: Stella Blue (Signed) · Date: 18 May 2020 01:43 AM · For: Summer at Quidditch Camp

Hi! I'm so sorry to have kept you waiting so long, but I'm finally here with that review you requested ages ago!!

 

The Cedric/Oliver pairing is somewhat new to me and I really like it! I could read so much of this! Thank goodness for AU stories where Cedric lives happily ever after and we get stories like this. Who would ever be tired of them? I say keep on writing them :D

 

I love your idea of a Quidditch camp too! I could totally see this being a thing in the wizarding world. It must be so cool for the kids who attend to be surrounded by professional Quidditch players too. What a neat idea.

 

Honestly though, I'm kind of surprised the camp invited Cedric back as a co-coach, haha - considering the previous year he backed out at the last minute and whoever organizes the camp had to find Flint as a super last minute replacement, which would be frustrating for them to have to scramble to find someone.

 

I have to admit a lot of this I was really frustrated with Cedric. Much of the confusion and misunderstandings in the first half could have been fixed with simple communication, like he assumes Oliver is mad at him, and even without admitting his feelings, Cedric could have at least asked if Oliver was mad at him. Ugh! Bad communication irritates me so much haha. (But it happens all the time in real life!)

 

In terms of characterization: I guess it comes down to personal headcanon. I always imagined Cedric as someone who was better at communicating, is pretty straightforward, just given that he gave Harry hints in the Triwizard Tournament and was generally helpful and got a date to the Yule Ball without the amount of confusion that's going on here. Which isn't to say that your characterization is wrong - maybe Oliver just makes Cedric more nervous than Cho did and that's why he's bad at communicating here. But to me it just seems a little out of character to how I understand Cedric.

 

However, I did really like seeing a softer side to Oliver here than we see in the books, because he's pretty much 100% Quidditch in the books, and it's nice to see another aspect of him. And even with that, he is still very true to character, especially when he's pointing out even before his fun night with Cedric that they have to still be well rested for the Quidditch game the next day haha.

 

Poor Rian haha. I feel like it was always most awkward for him. Like even before he walked in on Oliver and Cedric cuddling up, he probably could sense that there was something going on. And he had to sleep on the sofa in his own apartment. I hope it was at least a very comfortable sofa.

 

You asked about grammar so I thought I'd point this out:
and who my co-assistant leader and the certified coach that we’ll be helping are. -- It reads kind of unnaturally to have the sentence end with the word "are". Maybe you could rephrase it to something like, "and the identity of my co-assistant leader and the certified coach that we'll be helping."

And here: “Were we ever evening fighting for real?” -- I think you meant "even"

 

Oooh but this: A muddled feeling of confusion, like milk when it hasn’t quite mixed in with the tea -- I LOVE this!! What a creative and effective description.

 

The end was really nice too! I like that you left it a little open-ended too. It ends on such a happy note despite the fact that they might not see each other for a long time. But I think they will ;)

 

I really enjoyed reading this story! Once again I'm so sorry for the length of time it took for me to get to it. Great job!

Name: potionspartner (Signed) · Date: 26 Apr 2020 11:10 PM · For: Summer at Quidditch Camp

Hi, I'm here for the BvB.

Poor Cedric! Too be crushing that long on someone and it must be really bad if he just takes off just before camp last year. (Not that I'm condoning it because it was rather irresponsible of him.)  Actually, I think I feel more sorry for Oliver being stuck with Flint because of Diggory's shenanigans.

I was expecting the one bed since it was for the challenge but the 2nd bedroom/closet completely got me. I can't believe no one stuck their head in to check out the new digs when they walked in.

As far as Rian, that guy is a saint. I'd be rather annoyed, not chuckling, if I woke up to that scene in the bed next to me.

Author's Response:

Hey there! Thanks for the review. This story definitely needs some love. Honestly I think just with how it worked out between the two of them it's kind of good that Cedric ran away last minute just because that gave them both time to be sure they really loved the other person. But yeah it was definitely a bit cowardly haha. Yeah. I mean, it was a one bed challenge but they ended up sleeping in the same bed so I think it's sort of a play on it haha.

Rian is a saint. He's my little Bulgarian cinnamon roll.