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Hey Pix!
Hermione's melancholia defies romance beautifully. Draco's version can't find romance with both hands and a pack of dogs. The vampire thing has really settled into Hermione's Gryffindor soul, hasn't it? Draco has just accepted defeat in every element of his life. You've really given us a great contrast of characters and found their common ground - too bad for both of them that that ground is a trash-strewn vacant lot, eh?
This was a rough chapter to read - was it as difficult to write as it feels like? It's really good work, either way. Thanks!
George
Finally here for your review! I'm so sorry for the delay my friend! <3
This is so noir and so Pix of you and I am thoroughly enjoying this! I love your choices in weaving in the backstory regarding Hermione's experiences of the war, the way her relationship is sort of faltering with Ron, and this curse she had! We dive so much deeper into her head space, all the while she's limping along and just trying to get home.
I seriously felt for her here. Injured yet determined to find her own way. I can relate heavily to that. The interaction with the people in the middle of the night just show us the type of neighborhood she's in and always show us that she is capable. And she's more than her magic.
I am really digging the way you convey her character here! And the ending is a total 'oh shit,' kind of cliffhanger.
Also, there's something cozy about this too believe it or not. Like there are instances where she's seeking comfort from her present pain/circumstance. Of course those feelings are dashed by reality, but still you balance a lot of feelings and vibes very nicely in this chapter.
~ Courtney
Hiya, Pix! So you and Draco are back on speaking terms, sort of (okay, I'm pretty loose with my requirements for speaking terms and sundry vulgarities and curses count). He must have recouperated pretty quickly to do all that Magnolia Channel crap to the bar, though. I guess it's comforting to see he's still a twerp though, and treats his new admirer accordingly.
And his reaction to Hermione's arrival was classic. You didn't even need to waste time describing her outfit. A handful of sentences and you had her become the center of the universe again. That was really fine minimalism. I know this is moving in a really messy direction, but damn if it isn't a triumphant mess - better than the remains of Mardi Gras. Still reads great!
G
Nice cliffhanger, Pix! Especially after all the information you revealed in this chapter to answer so many open plot questions, that was a snappy finish indeed. Metzker seems to have really underestimated Hermione's logical ability - perhaps sheoverlooked her muggleborn status (after all, Metzker probably didn't know anything about who solved the potion puzzle to find the Philosopher's Stone, eh?).
I love how Hermione's new vampire powers help remind her of her friends, too. Another move backfired on the evil therapist! Now Hermione's got enough to go on that will let her fight back - can't wait to see how effectively she does so. A pissed off Hermione is nobody to mess with. Thanks for another fine chapter!
G
Mercy indeed, Pix. Despite all the bumps you found on the road to get here, you've made the turn wonderfully subtle. Now that she's undead Hermione seems to have regained her kindness, at least a bit, and at least as far as Ron is concerned. I dunno if she'd be kind to Burns if she thought she had the chance to light him up for a while. And that sneaky so-called therapist might need to be careful where she parks her coffin once Hermione gets settled into the shadows.
I really admire the way you've shifted gears after hitting the beat last chapter that started Hermione's journey to her new home. Undead or not, Hermione seems to have recovered her personality now and I look forward to how she'll take the future to task in resolving her situation. Again, thanks for this chapter - it's a pip.
George
Author's Response:Hi!
I'm glad you found the turn subtle. I'm still mostly in denial about the last few chapters, but here, Hermione is finally getting to the point where she's accepting her new normal. I'm not sure how I did in regards to making Hermione's change feel like she's changed, but still like the same person, if that makes sense. There were a lot of decisions I had to make, and maybe I did okay with some of them. Maybe I'm still overthinking others.
At any rate, it's interesting that you mention Metzker. here..
Pix
Hi, Pix! Here for our swap! :)
I will go back to Five and Saira, but I really wanted to take a break to see how Hermione was doing instead... hope you don't mind... also hope that I'm not missing too much by starting here instead of going back to the beginning after your edits... :P
Well... definitely she isn't doing too well... poor thing... but at least, it seems that she hasn't been turned, after all? Not fully? Unless the "bursting in flames when hit by sunlight" thing is a false belief, which is also possible, since I bet no one really knows much about vampires... uhm... but I suppose we'll find out more as the story moves on.
Ouch! You don't know what you're missing until you lose it, right? I didn't even think about how getting to the Ministry without magic might be complicated... and now Ron isn't there to pull the chain for her... or simply to be there for her in general with his supportive smile... But that's what she had wanted, right? Mmmh, not so sure...
For a moment I wondered if the vampire bites had somehow given her the magical power to make the entry appear for her, but then the nice, unknown witch appeared and offered to help, so we'll never know... :P interesting moment, though. It's strange to see Hermione so lost, her brain coming up with alternative solutions, because Hermione's brain will always be hard at work no matter what, but the rest of her is just there paralyzed... it's a side of her we don't often see, but that makes total sense in context. And then the solution arrives, and she accepts it, but something's just off... not sure if I'm making any sense here... :P
Double ouch! That stare from Ron, and then him simply walking away, finally realizing that she does neither want nor need him... right when she's starting to realize that she both needs and wants him and fighting with herself if she should run to him or let him go... it's just so painful to see, honestly... :(
Great chapter as always! I'll be back hopefully soon!
Big snowball hug,
Chiara
Hey Pix,
For once, I can't tease you much about a chapter of this story, cause you snuck in a serious (at least semi-serious) one on me. Hermione's got such intense feelings about her self-image, doesn't she? True to canon-Hermione, she's more upset that she can't be what she pictured herself to be - a paragon of virtue, I guess - than she is that she's really and truly stuck with this for eternity.
Gotta love Burns, though. No sentimental bones in that guy! He'll take care of her because he can use her but he is clearly not impressed by anything about her. What a wicked bugger you've given us! Between the two of them, you've provided us a good, solid beat to turn the story towards home. Fine chapter! Thanks as always.
George
Hey, Pix!
You're doing such a great job piling on more intensity with every sentence of this story. It's really beautifully done and it has me reacting like a kid at a Saturday matinee - I was quite literally on the edge of my seat reading this chapter. Once again you've managed to create a visual impression even though the darkness hides most of what humans could see.
We finally get the reveal of wicked old Dr Metzker, who turns out to be even more evil than we expected! At least Hermione gets her teeth in the vile trickster before everything really hits the fan, but I reckon those boots she recognizes are our old buddy Burns so we can only wonder if he's going to grant her plea.
Really fine work, Pix. Thank you.
G
Pix! You do like Draco! Astoria still loves his sorry arse? That poor kid. And Hermione is still deluding herself into thinking she isn't a vampire forever? Pix, you wicked old softie.
Draco has taken her to St Mungo's to try and save his skin from Burns but he has to know that dude has no mercy. He doesn't seem to notice what he's putting Astoria through, either. He is such a twerp. I'm really wondering why Hermione wanted him to take her back to the warehouse, though, and I'm even curiouser about what good she thinks she can do there. Not do mention what Draco thinks his leaving her there will do him with Burns. You got me yanking my hair of again, kiddo!
Thanks for another fond chapter. I'm loving this story as usual.
G
You’ve done a great job setting up Hermione’s challenges, both physical and emotional, here. You’ve taken what we think of as a “typical Hermione” and adapted it well when faced with this tragedy. I like how you flow between her challenges in the taxi and her conversations with Dr. Metzker, back and forth as if he’s sitting on her shoulder commenting on her daily activities.
However, I’m really questioning Hermione’s intelligence here-going to an (probably abandoned) warehouse late at night when she has no way to defend herself. What was the doctor thinking sending her there?
The woman was just eerie and the danger alarm begins to ring in the my head especially when she says that Hermione is exactly what they need?
Great introduction to grab out attention. Definitely makes you wonder what will happen next.
Pix! Another lovely chapter! Hermione dancing with all those vampire dudes is a a trip. Too bad Draco is such a chickenshit that he missed all the fine choreography of fangs and blood so all we got to see was the aftermath. Sigh. She did look incredible when she was coming for Draco, though - right up until her magic charge ran down. Well shite, indeed!
Another fun chapter. Always good for Draco to wet himself. Thanks!
G
hah i kinda love that draco is supplying vampires with his own lil mix of blood - reminds me how he was quite good at potions while at school. i love even more the mysteriously dangerous vampire lady because she oozes danger and i love that, can't wait to see more of her :D maybe i'm deranged, who knows :P
i also kinda laughed at the vampires who are seemingly having problems with hermione's cursed blood lololo serves them right
i wonder whether her not turning immediately has something to do with that or maybe she won't ever turn for real? but it sure would be fun reading her dealing with vampirism if she did turn
draco meeting hermione is bound to be interesting, especially if he manages to figure something out about her/the curse/her condition :eyes:
kris
well i think it's safe to say things are not looking up for hermione and to me it seems that they're not likely to look up any time soon...more likely they'll just go downhill from here :/
which is sad for her but oh well...it is a noir story :D
i wonder what her boss' problem is. i mean...i wouldn't have expected so much animosity towards hermione who's basically a war hero, but who knows what's the background on that guy hmmm
draco being an informant is very fitting with his character and i suspect he won't be too happy that hermione contacts him heh
hopefully she err, does something about her whole...condition...because honestly, you write her so well that i feel a lil sickly just reading about her symptoms :sweat_smile:
kris
hm hm hm
is it possible all the stuff written in books hermione read about vampires is wrong? or, well, not all but some stuff...that's rude. considering our lil vampire is a bookworm. oopsie
okay but for real -- reading about hermione struggling due to her injury is just...painful. and super sad. she seriously needs a break. knowing she regrets pushing ron away makes me hope she'll try fixing up tgeir friendship because she definitely needs a friend.
kris
aw man
hermione is hungryyyyyy :eyes: i wonder how her moral compass is going to deal with *that*
but ron! i love the way you wrote him! i mean he gets on her nerves and i get that but i love that their friendship is still so strong and that her rejection of him as a romantic partner (which makes sense) doesn't mean their friendship is over and i think that's my favourite takeaway from this chapter *_*
kris
I reckon that flat out prurient is the only way I can believe Dramione, too, Pix. That's one well written bunch of naughty behavior there, kiddo! You do such a nice job of taking Hermione from sensually self-satisfied to shocked by her own lust to just rolling with it in a really short span. The bit as she's waking and stretching, up until she downs that potion, is really hot stuff. You're being nice to Draco again, too! Even nicer than cake! Damn,
Can't pretend Draco is really so down and out that he can't still spot the main chance and grab it, that's for sure. He's so true to his character here - nothing beats him when it comes to greed or arrogance, even when he's looking down at the world from the gutter. This is beautiful work, Pix. The description is among the best you've done in this story, too. Okay, so I'm gonna shut up now and go shower or something.
G
w o w
i love the way you write, honestly. it's just how effortlessly you weave the backstory of hermione's curse and how things developed for her (and ron) and how it fit so naturally into the story that's happening in the present...idk, it's just really great writing and i love it so much
but also. poor hermione, the state she's in, and not knowing w t f happened to her, i think she's not completely freaking out because of everything else she'd been through so far in her life, it's almost like she's become a little numb towards all the shitty and fucked up things that happen. and also...yeah okay, i suppose she's not yet fully aware of the state she's actually in, but still, i feel like her war (and even pre-war) experiences definitely make her more resilient in the face of hardship, but on the other hand...i suspect make her more fragile when it comes to other stuff as well. it's just a matter of if or when the fragility will present itself.
i'm super curious to read on :eyes:
okay so i knew vampires were like ~~teh story but i didn't expect them to flat out attack hermione who was going to try and help them. very rude of them but on the other hand, it makes for a great story and first chapter :eyes:
but to backtrack a little - i love the entire concept of this story, first hermione being handicapped (i suppose her arm was cursed or something? it reminds me of the thingy that happened to dumbledore when he was dealing with the gaunt ring) and magicless and like,,,she's the type of person who definitely would struggle *a lot* with that, she was so great at doing magic and losing that must've hit her pretty damn hard. i'm not surprised she went through a bunch of therapists before dr. metzker. who also seems very sus since he's the one who sent her to meet the vampires who rudely attacked her. damn,, she really can't get a break
i also love that despite the fact that the handicap must've hit her hard, she's still hermione and she's stubborn af so of course she'll try to do everything on her own, not asking for help. which might not be great, but it's still very much ~~her
anyhow.
whew
this was one hell of a chapter and i'm excited to read moreeee :eyes:
kris
Hey, Pix, good to see you've managed to beat this chapter into submission! It feels a bit different from the earlier ones, but still makes a solid contribution to your narrative. I like your handling of Hermione's internal monologue here - she seems to be getting a little control over her thoughts at last, although I'm not sure whether she's fooling herself to do so - seems likely, given all that's happened so far.
The meeting with Draco is mighty civilized compared to the last time they met up - although I gotta wonder how civilixed it'll stay after you drop the curtain on them. Could be way less crazy than us gutter-dwellers are prone to assume, of course, but I reckon Hermione could go wilder than mortals expect, too. That line "her body was more truthful than her conscience, feeling all sorts of things" brings to mind an ancient Pete Townshend lyric "my dreams, they aren't as empty as my conscience seems to be" that is followed shortly by a musical explosion to bring havoc to what appeared to be a peaceful ballad. Everything that's happened to Hermione so far makes me expect the next chapter will blow up in my face!
Nice job on this chapter - you keep me guessing all the time, which is way more fun than letting me predict things accurately. Thanks again!
George
Author's Response:Hi there. So... this is the part where I start to pretend that I'm not responsible for writing this story. The tonal shift is definitely all Hermione. She is convinced that she's back in control. Is she fooling herself? Most definitely. Seems to be a talent of hers.
That curtain is going to be a heavy one for a while. If you're waiting for an explosion, you have *checks outline* just a little while longer. We're getting there.
Go ahead with the predictions. It will be fun to see if you hit anything! I promise I won't spoil things for you.
Pix
I'm back for the Project Tempus Linea event!!
I love how the beginning bit of this chapter read. It really sets the tone of the confusion Hermione is feeling by forcing us to feel the same way.We're also forced to take stock of everything and try to piece together what actually happened. It just adds even more to the feeling of being tossed right into the story which I absolutely love.
I also love how a little bit more backstory is peppered into this. And I love how Ron really truly is trying to help and is still supportive of her. It's honestly refreshing that he's not immediately the villain of a Dramione story so that is just more proof that I picked the right one to read lol.
Ooo, more context with the way that lady reacted to Hermione. Is she talking about the vampires? Does she know something about them? Or are they part of something even bigger? It's a quick and easy almost throwaway but it just adds to the intrigue of what exactly is the plot going on.
And damn, that ending. The cliffhangers are killing me but clearly they're working because I can't wait to read the next chapter!!
~Ashley
Hello!! Here for the Project Tempus Linea review event :)
Right off the bat, I am not a fan of Dramione but the summary and the disclaimer have me very intrigued. I love how we are tossed right into the story at the beginning and slowly get introduced to the premise as we go. And I have to say, I'm definitely intrigured. Hermione losing her magic? And what's up with her arm?? The questions are coming immediately and it's definitely got me hooked from the very beginning.
The vampires are so cool and such an interesting addition but now I'm immediately suspicious of her therapist. Like, they sound like a cool person who geuinely was helping her but like...they had to have known what they were sending her into?? What's up with that???
I am absolutely hooked right from the start and I can't wait to see more of the plot and where we go from here!!
~ Ashley
Oh, wow. A vampire of some power and importance has come to see Hermione in her office. Why? Burns, the vamire, is connected to the mysterious 'Council' that oversees vampires and is outside of the Ministry.
His goal is to 'exterminate' the rogue vampires who attacked Hermione (and other people too, apparently), but she doesn't want to exterminate anyone, no matter how dangerous and loathsome. I am reminded of the scene in Deathly Hallows where Neville asks the trio what they did with the dragon that carried them from Gringott's Bank to Scotland, and Ron says that they let him go, but that Hermione was all for keeping him as a pet. Could vampires be rehabilitated and rendered harmless? Hermione probably hopes so.
Hermione gets a lot of basic information from Burns. He says that she is only 'half-turned' into a vampire at present, but apparently one cannot remain thus indefinitely. She must choose, either to become fully-turned into a vampire, or undergo a ritual performed by the rogue vampires that would turn her back to her former self. A no-brainer decision, one would assume.
Really bad news. After I had been happy for her and thought that things were getting better: the improvement caused by the blood potion is only temporary, The magic she has just regained is not hers, it comes from the unwilling blood donors and will wear off. She will die in 24 hours if she doesn't do something.
A huge dilemma about what to do, whom to trust/help, and a very short time to decide. What a predicament, and just when I thought things were getting better You have quite the imagination and quite the convoluted plot.
Will we see Draco again? Will he be able to help? Hermione is really in a dumpster fire, to use your phrase.
Vicki
This is an exciting chapter, for sure. A miracle that, first, Hermione started to feel somewhat better, and that she had the stamina to look through all those books, hunting for the very scarce scraps of information that they provided, but nevertheless getting something out of it. Then beginning to look through all the papers that Draco had shared with her, and seeing that there were factoids, such as the address of the Night Hags organization being the same as the address to which her therapist had sent her. It sounds as if Hermione is moving off dead center, not by much, but some movement is exciting.
One concludes that there was something in those blood bags of Draco's, some ingredient in his 'secret sauce', that is making Hemione feel better, less like dying, and that's very welcome. Maybe her feeling somewhat better is the reason why she starts to act automatically a little more normally, such as by Accioing her tea mug without thinking about it, just doing like she did in the old days. What a shock! It worked! And then her withered arm and hand revived, with a spasm of pain as all the molecules aligned themselves into their proper anatomical configurations once again. Kind of like having a dislocated shoulder reduced without anesthetic.
It must be something in the blood bags to make such a drastic change so soon after she drank the contents of the bags. There's no other good explanation. Now I wonder if this is a permanent improvement or a medicaltion that will have to be taken periodically for an indefinite span of tiem. Hopefully the former.
What is the cold case involving a missing person that Hermione thinks her therapist might be mixed up with? Maybe you have already mentioned it in the earlier chapters and I have just forgotten, or maybe it will all be cleared up later in the story. At any rate, I''m really happy for her!
Great story.Vicki
Pix, you old softie! You gave him cake and a froo-froo drink? And let him get jinky? My oh my. I guess it really was Rick James after all, huh?
This chapter really cracked me up! Naming his hangover relief potion Everclear is classic. "At this rate, he could rent out the room for a photo shoot of the Spring Break edition of Witches Gone Wild: The Afterparty, and make a small fortune." I'm dying! But why the hell is Draco, of all people, sparing any thought for the possibility that Hermione is tanking her career? He's making a profit, apparently, even with the damage to his office and confusion to his libido.
As always, I'm here to tell you you're killing this, Pix. I dunno why nobody else is reviewing you but they're all missing out. Thanks for another fun read.
G
Author's Response:Hi George!
Still Looney Tunes over here. I don't know what you're talking about.
So here's where I have clearly thrown all propriety out the window, and yet, in attempting to lose the plot, I've managed to get it dangerously wrapped around my throat.
Also, let's pretend that Draco doesn't really care about Hermione tanking her career, he's simply remarking on it as an unexpected change in her MO. Because clearly, Draco only cares about one thing.
Maybe two.
You know what? I don't care what Draco Malfoy cares about. He's clearly not in a position to be a beggar or a chooser.
Haha, maybe people were scared off by my disclaimer in the story shell. Maybe it should have said: "Danger. Complete and utter nonsense ahead."
Thanks again for reading!
Pix
Hi, Pix.
You almost have to feel sorry for Draco right now.. An almost-unsolvable problem has just landed on his sofa. He thinks to himself, ' It eas incomprehensible that she truly had no idea what had hppened to her, or why.' That line echoes my own thoughts in a previous review, where i said that alarm bells should be going off in her head, but they're not. Of course Draco is seeing her at her worst, at this moment, but her ailmets have been going on for over a year now, and she still doesn't have a clue, despite being the brightest witch of her age.
Then Draco has to cudgel his brain about the freaky cursed blood that has suddenly shown up. My thought is that the vampires got infected with it when they drank Hermioe's blood, not knowing tha she had been fighting this magic-destroying, body-wasting disease for a year.
Poor Draco (and I do feel sorry for him) has suddenly had a load of pressure placed on him, and this chapter focuses on that as he paces around and thinks of all the potentioal trouble he's in. Hermione on his sofa, his need to manufacture more blood potion fast, Hermione's probable future requests for more blood, the strange problems in the vampire world (tainted blood, attacks on wizards) that can only spell trouble.
Thus the pressure on his bladder, which seems to be a symbol for all the other pressures he's experiencing.
Too bad those other pressures are not so easily relieved.
What kind of a birthday has this been for him?
Author's Response:Hi Vicki!
A Bad Birthday. That's what Draco Malfoy is having. I suppose you can feel sorry for him if you want to. I suppose I might have given him a little bit for people to feel sympathy for him. I suppose he might deserve just a little of that... or not. I don't know. Ok, yes, I do know. But I don't like it.
Even though Draco sees Hermione in this state, he still doesn't know she's lost her magic. He doesn't know how or why she's in the state she's in, but he's the character who understands how bad it is, and what eventually happens to people in her position.
And yes, he is in a lot of trouble. I don't think he's ever gotten himself out of it.
I love symbols! Lol!
Thanks for the review!
Pix
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