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WHAT SAM?! OMGAWSH WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! Ok, so from a writer's standpoint, from a "you really captured the theme and deeper meaning within this piece," standpoint, I tip my hat off to you! But from a reader's standpoint I am thoroughly frustrated because SHE HAD A DECISION TO MAKE AND WE DON'T FULLY KNOW WHAT THAT DECISION WAS. And how dare you make Neville so damn cute and wonderful and then we have no clue if Hannah chooses to marry him and be with other people or how it all pans out. Urghh. But I think you captured love in such a beautiful fashion throughout this entire piece. You grew Hannah into who she is, which is an open, caring, and most precious being. She's truly lived and it's a wonderful sentiment.
Brava!
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
Ahh! I am stressed because it's not clear if Hannah will choose Neville and I SO want her to. And I SO want him to continue to give Hannah everything she needs, which also involves Susan. But I think Hannah's entire thought process is totally valid. This idea that marriage is exclusive is one that's drilled into us since birth. So her struggle to see it in any other way is believable. But I also love how Susan points out that polyamory is possible because of Luna. And Susan of course is the most gd supportive partner on the face of the planet. Like telling Hannah "I'll say whatever you want," because it's always about the other person for her, is selfless, heart wrenching, but also lovely. She's precious too. And omgawsh I'm sorry I keep saying precious in all of these reviews LOL. But you make them all feel this way and you make me feel warm and soft with this entire piece. Thank you!
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
Sam I thought I was going to have to kill you for wrecking this adorable, soft, sweet couple again. But ok, I can accept this proposal because it is absolutely fitting for them omgawsh! I love how Neville's certainty that Hannah is his "everything partner," is back again. And i love his ability to give her what she needs in terms of stability and reliability, but also in terms of her freedom.
She has another partner too it seems, this Nat. Which, by the way, totally HOT smut in the previous chapter. I'm just kind of awkward sometimes and couldn't up with a long enough review to leave there. Also, Melanie (RonsGirlFriday) and I just tend to tell ppl "good sex bro," when reviewing smut. And it was GOOD SEX.
This chapter was sheer perfection!
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
I love the visual of Hannah, Susan, and Neville being linked together as they walk around shopping. And the woman with her judgments. And Susan's remark of "she'll just assume what is easiest." So true, in spite of how messed up that concept is. I love Hannah's anti-patriarchy rants though. "Do girls have to kiss every other step to be validated as lovers?" Like yeah, I'm with you with how ridiculous that is Hannah.
I love the psuedo mocking that Susan and Neville partake in. And I love that Susan calls him "Doctor Longbottom," man when did I think that would be so sexy? I don't know, but here we are.
"We parade down Diagon Alley, arms filled with ice cream and love, feeling unstoppable at our private intersection of outsiders and don't-give-a-fuck-about-it-ers." Love it! They're fierce, they're lovers, and everyone else be damned!
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
Ahh ok yes! I was totally hoping for a reconciliation between them. Just because I think my heart would break forever if Neville ended up being like Ernie in this collection. So I was SO RELIEVED that he was willing to be open and adult about the whole thing. And of course, he wasn't making excuses, he was really apologizing. Which is hard to do well. But he does it well enough and Hannah forgives him and they're going to be back on track and yet he might be changed, but he knows that he has to be honest with her from now on.
Also, I think what you highlight with Judith is what I've often felt with being bisexual. Some dudes can be gross about it and be all "hot," when you tell them you're into women. So while these types of relationships are different, I think those feelings are also present here as well. Of course Neville is not about that level of fetish or gross and he leaves Judith behind for the lovely, wonderful Hannah. I am glad they're back on track. Thanks for fixing that. ;)
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
Aww oh no. Poor Hannah. I mean she wanted Neville to be honest with her about his desires and wants in a relationship and she thought he was, and to learn that everything has changed against the back drop of this intoxicating whirlwind of a celebration...it feel harsh. And aww oh no, comparing Neville to Ernie. No me gusta. I am saddened by that. But again, I think it speaks of the tone and theme of this piece. You convey so many deep emotions with so few words in this piece. Well done!
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
Again, I love the effervescence of the beginning of this chapter. Ladies playing games and giggling and just totally enjoying themselves with total abandon. And then of course, they have a "serious, couple discussion," that feels totally necessary at this stage of things. I love how you continue to show their differences in terms of how they view relationships, but how it doesn't affect their compatibility. I think you show healthy relationships in a marvelous way here. I also feel Hannah's desperation so acutely. Her whole "please don't leave me," was just so darling. But I love that her and Susan are on the same page with everything. It's lovely. They're lovely.
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
Awww poor Susan! This had all the trappings of a bubbly, flirty chapter w/two girlfriends. And then, Susan discloses her heartbreak and we see a whole new side to her.
"Her pain is not beautiful, but her unguarded heart is. Even in her suffering she offers me that heart in all its vulnerable honesty." This was seriously a lovely line. Pain isn't beauty, but vulnerability can be. And Susan's honesty is what makes her uniquely Susan. So I loved these two lines so, so much!
Also, the concept of a lover just silently laying down and holding the one whose hurting is so universal with its comforts. But some people don't always see the act as comforting. And Hannah has no idea if what she is doing is helpful, but it's how she sees being helpful in a relationship. So naturally, she'll do whatever she can to help her Susan.
Lovely, heartbreaking, and touching all in one.
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
Ok, first of all, I love that they are at a Herbology convention. I love that she's trying to take an interest in the thing he loves. But she's not very good at identifying correct plants, but Neville doesn't mind. Because Neville sees her trying and it makes him love her even more. And Neville is just a precious, loving boi with such devotion and we love him to death. <3
I love their swinging arms and hands clasped together. It's such a lighthearted visual full of sweet emotion.
And I love that Hannah tries to get Neville to start something with the Welcome Witch because it's now her way of loving and she wants to share it with him. But Neville is different, but not like Ernie different, like Neville different. Like he really LURVS Hannah different. And I love that now that she can't see any other way to loving someone, she starts arguing with him and then is like WAIT WHAT AM I DOING? And then asking for kisses like STOP. Stop they're so precious, I can't stand it. (But I can. I love this.)
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
Omgawsh I am here for this depiction of Neville! Him being all "I get it, I'm friends with Luna." And him being so into Hannah. Oh my gawsh this sweet creature, how I love him and how he is with precious Hannah. He is worthy. He can stay.
And them narrating what they're gonna do next. From Neville's "I very much would like to kiss you." To Hannah's "Oh yes kissing, let's do that." You create this sweet, awkward yet loving and accepting bond between them and I am totally about it.
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
Oh my how precious this was! I love everything from flustered Hannah to her trying to act as Sally Anne suggests she has to because of how Sally Anne perceives Neville. But Hannah is just totally her awkward, precious bumbling self and I adore it! I adore how she tries and fails to be cool, calm, and collected in front of Neville and just blurts out in a single phrase, "Do you wanna date me? I mean dance." And Neville bless him, being totally oblivious to Hannah's advances. At least in this moment. Did I mention I love soft bois? Well. I hope Neville turns out to be a way more softy soft boi than Ernie. Just saying.
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
Oh my gawsh this chapter was so fun and lighthearted and adorable! I love Hannah seeking relationship advice on the polyamorous front from Susan. And Susan is just so encouraging and sweet and reassuring with her. And is even trying to help her get Neville into bed. It's both hilarious and adorable because you totally would not think of Neville Longbottom in this way. But I also think that is what makes this story totally amazing and great. Showing different relationship dynamics and how there are more ways than one in terms of being committed to another person. I cannot wait to see how this all unfolds!
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
"I am hers in body and in soul, and yet I am more my own than I have ever been." Oh you know I am reeling with excitement on the inside for this level of agency. I love how you convey that it is possible to be your own person while loving someone else as deeply as Hannah loves Susan. It's a lovely sentiment that rebels against this idea of "you have to choose yourself or another person." I think all relationships come with concessions, but you should be able to achieve some level of both? I dunno. Maybe I'm getting a little too philosophical here LOL.
"My torso is warmed by her arms, my heart is warmed by her lips." Such poetic imagery! You kill me with this level of word beauty!
Oh and I love the level of growth and acceptance we see within Hannah. She loves Susan for her true self here and that is just beautiful. And eep! I was wondering when/how Neville might factor into this story! I am here for a precious, accepting Neville. I hope that's what I will receive? * crosses fingers *
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
"The girl I hadn’t thought to miss, the girl I never considered I’d love, the girl who is now the star that I wish upon." HOW DO YOU WRITE? HOW DO YOU FREAKING WRITE? This is so freaking beautiful!
I am sooo enamored with them. I appreciate Susan's honesty in that she will always be polyamorous. I love her coyly admitting to "maybe," loving Hannah. I love Hannah's reaction to it. This entire thing feels lovely and realistic. I'm not polyamorous, but like...you paint this in such a positive light and are making me consider ways of life that I never had before. I mean, not that I was judgmental about it, it was just like never presented as a thing to me? Ya know?
And Hannah is so DAMN precious. And Susan promising never to hurt her. What a sweetheart. Although, I imagine has to readjust her view on monogamy and relationships before this won't happen.
But Hannah saying she "may," love Susan back. The most adorable way to say I love you without saying I love you, if I do say so myself. Another well crafted chapter Sam. Another way to make me feel all the feels here.
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
"Maybe I’m thinking too much and doing too little." This is such a simple notion. But in Hannah's current predicament it's powerful. This next step will determine the course of her life forever and whether or not she will achieve what she perceives her version of happiness. I think her holding onto this notion of keeping Ernie while also seeing Susan speaks to this idea of "well I've put in the time for this relationship, so it kind of has to count for something." This idea that you've wasted a portion of your life with someone who may or may not be the best person for you is totally valid and relatable I think. And this idea of being blissfully unaware and therefore happy. It's comforting right? I think you show that Hannah is someone who values what feels comfortable (Ernie) over what feels daring and "real" (Susan).
I feel Hannah's indecision. I feel the magnitude of her choice and her weighing the possible outcomes. I'm rooting for her and I hope she gets the happiness she so clearly deserves in this piece!
And Ernie makes her choice quite easy by being the hypocrite that he is. So yeah. Good for Hannah. Seize your moment girl!
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
Once again you show such positivity in how Susan and Hannah handle their attraction to one another. Susan is such a good friend (with feelings) here. She listens to Hannah rant and rave on about what an arse Ernie is. She comforts her, she offers her hard truths that only a friend could. But she's doing it for Hannah's benefit. She isn't doing it in the hopes that Hannah will profess her love and fall into bed with her. Ok, so they do sort of fall into bed with one another. But (for now) it's platonic and it's precisely what Hannah needed at the moment. Such a beautiful sentiment about friendship and love and how to know when to go for which piece of the relationship the other person needs most. Susan is rather selfless in that way. I am here for them snuggle sleeping. :)
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
Oh my gawsh! I take everything good I ever said about Ernie back. What a cad! I am shocked and saddened because it seemed like Hannah and him had something special and they're a rare pair so...but. Of course he thought polyamory was dumb because he likes dealing with separate exclusivities. Gah I shouldn't totally judge because maybe he will surprise me in the next drabble or so. Or maybe not. Maybe I need to keep reading either way. But how said for Hannah to not even be noticed in that moment because he's all gross google eyes for his secretary. Especially when Hannah was going to do a nice thing for him and give him his lunch. Well he doesn't deserve his lunch now.
Must. Read. On.
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
Ooh ok, so I love the description of Hannah and Susan's love changing form into something new. Because people change over time and therefore, relationships will change as those people do. I think it's a very adult concept and I am here for realism. So I appreciate it wholeheartedly. <3
"'Beautiful.' She repeats the word slowly, her lips moving the same pattern as mine."
Jesus, Sam the way you describe lips. I feel like it's sexy yet romantic wrapped into this perfect, little gift.
Also, the way you depict polyamory as living by "choice of freedom," versus "choice of exclusivity." I really think you showcase this sort of relationship in such a positive and realistic way. I don't think people we're ever meant to be monogamous. But rather they choose to be because that is what they're comfortable with? Again, just my opinion and also how i am interpreting your meaning behind these thoughts and words. I really love how Susan is pushing Hannah to explore the full range of her feelings, but not in a way that feels manipulative or seductive. She's giving her agency. Which I am all about in all contexts. :)
“Living is kind of beautiful, period. People just complicate it by making up rules and pretending it’s not.” Like holy shit, I love this entire way of thinking. How you interpret the world is just gorgeous. Write me all the beautiful things. <3
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
I love how in chapter one there is this intensity between Hannah and Susan that leaves you burning. But this chapter with Hannah and Ernie just really leaves you like a ball of domestic fluff. It's vanilla and sweet and there is great care and thoughtfulness between them. But it's not like a passionate sort of love. It's comfortable. And Ernie's kind of romantic in a way that I would never imagine Ernie MacMillan to be. He's a soft boi and i love a good soft boi. I love this: "I am pleased to have a reason to talk about her, to shape my lips around the name that lingers in my mind." It is poetic and heartfelt, but it's also hella relatable. Even sometimes in a committed relationship other people flit into your lives whom you just want to talk about all the time. I love seeing that sentiment here. And I love how Ernie is all "you don't need my permission," like a good, solid man who isn't bothered by his partner's comings and goings. We need more men like this in the world.
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
Sam this is so freaking beautiful! You have a way of describing this love as delicate yet needy. You feel the depths of their history while also rooting for them in the future. They aren't touching much in this, but you wish they were. The care and attention to detail about certain ways they've touched in the past versus how they've touched no is just absolutely stunning! The history that borders on serious (them fighting in a war) to just being carefree girls together (making peppermint mochas and studying) is so vast. You literally say so much with so few words and I am TOTALLY HERE for this entire series of drabbles!
One more thing: I love how the world melts away when they're staring at one another in the street and have this moment of memories just flashing back. And then I love how in the pub when they hold hands we're left with "nothing else matters." You show they're pull towards one another as a natural force to be reckoned with. I just adored that element to this drabble.
<3 Courtney
* team ice otter *
Uuurrghh Sam, I need immediate relief after the cliff-hanger!! I can’t afford to have to READ??? SEVERAL LINES??? before I find out what happened! (edit, after having read the rest of the chapter: I’m just supposed to decide all of that for myself?? how dare you??)
(I mean, I know that just outright telling us wouldn’t be very good story telling, but a girl can dream.)
And then you tease us with all of those unhelpfully ambiguous descriptions! Whose arms? Which lover? WHICH PARTNER’S FACE? (And ideally, how many of them in the grand scheme of things; I’d like a detailed run-down of their names, addresses and favourite flavours of ice cream, thank you).
And, like, all of the descriptions are lovely and achingly pretty as always, but I need answers, Sam! I can’t just be expected to make decisions for myself?? But at least Hannah’s happy, so I’m just going to assume she has all the partners she could ever want in life, which most definitely includes both Neville and Susan (:
This was just such a beautifully lovely story, all of it, even the angsty bits (sob), Sam, thank you so much for writing it!
x Julia
I’m back!
I’m so scared to read on, because of those blatant threats you made in the discord! And the chapter title isn’t exactly promising, either, in terms of how well it would fulfil my incessant need for fluff :(
Oh, Hannah… Only you could turn a wonderfully sweet proposal of marriage, that hits all the milestones you want to meet with Neville in something to be anxious about – as if a dynamic that has been working for years (I’m assuming anyway, at this point?) was going to crumble and fall apart just because you wear a new piece of jewellery on your finger!
But just when I expect Susan to wash away Hannah’s worries, like she always does, she can’t do it for once, and is instead upset herself – I wonder if Susan’s and Luna’s dynamic has changed since Luna married, and if they’ve grown further apart, which is why she’s so unsure here?
And then you leave us on this cliff-hanger, which is frankly cruel!
x Julia
ADFSLKFKJJ SAM!!!
This was so adorable, I love Neville – he’s such a sweetheart!
And Hannah, too! I do love how excitable she is at the prospect of Neville finding someone else, and how she immediately pictures them involved in her life, too – but the minute she thinks it’s serious between Neville and his new mystery girlfriend, she’s immediately overcome by her old fear of rejection, and thinks she’s about to be thrown out into the streets. She really can be so oblivious when it comes to the affection other people have for her!
And I absolutely love Neville’s proposal, and how he meticulously spells out for Hannah that she’s it for him, and that he doesn’t want anyone else, because all of those needs Hannah finds fulfilled in different people (which he loves about her, and I love that he pointed that out!) he finds in her, and this was just so sweet!!
x Julia
Ooh, this is exciting!
I kind of love how you just throw us right into the midst of things, and leave us out on our own to find our way around, even if I do have some trouble fitting this in with the rest of the narrative. But I suppose that’s the fun of it!
I also loved seeing Hannah with another person we hadn’t yet met, and how her relationship with the mysterious Nat (or what we see of it, anyway) has yet another dynamic that’s different from both her relationship with Susan and with Neville, and how this new (for us, anyway) relationship seems to fulfil yet a different set of Hannah’s needs and wishes, and how there’s yet another set of ‘milestones’ attached to it!
I also really loved the line about the mozzarella sticks!
x Julia
Hi Sam, I’m back for the HC finale!
“A daisy chain of ice cream cones and lovers” – Sam, this is too pure; that’s the most adorable phrase I’ve ever read anywhere! (And I really needed that cutesy moment!)
But I also love that you tackle some more serious issues here! So far, the girls and Neville have mostly existed in this weird bubble of acceptance (discounting Ernie in the beginning, and perhaps Sally-Anne) but of course they must get a lot of shit on a regular basis – but they’re well-versed in dealing with that bullshit, so they can have a laugh about it without it ruining their day, which is lovely!
I am however, very put off by Neville’s choice of ice cream: balsamic and strawberry?! Is that two different flavours or just one? And honestly, I can’t even tell you which would be more horrifying because who decides to get VINEGAR FLAVOURED ICE CREAM???
x Julia
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